Jason Emmanuel Snyder:
I have been formally meditating now for about 6 weeks and came across MCTB and the insight map maybe 3 weeks ago. Today was my first 3 hour meditation (usually 1-2 hours) and now have some questions as to whether I am cycling through the first few stages, possibly up to Equanimity, or if I am still just in the first stage. Here is first a reflection and a question, followed by a description of some experiences I had today. I would really appreciate some diagnosis here:
First a reflection: Except at the very beginning in order to frame the object of focus and maybe build some momentum, I find the mental labeling process fairly distracting. I feel like I am able to directly perceive things (emotions, body sensations, vibrations, thoughts on process, etc) which a fair degree of precision and accuracy. But when I start trying to mentally label everything, it seems like 75% of my mental energy is dissipated in just coming up with words to describe things. And in order to try and keep up the pace my mind starts manically noting on autopilot, saying many things that weren't even perceived or directly forcing sensations in order to perceive them. Then when I drop the noting again and allow myself to just be aware, the precision, depth, and speed of awareness quickly picks back up.
I know that as people progress they tend to drop the noting. But my question is. Am I finding noting distracting because I have progressed past needing to use it, or is it because I haven't progressed hardly at all and still need to build that skill?
If you are finding the practice of noting to be distracting, then you are not the first person to make note of this. Not everyone needs to learn (or practice) this noting business in the way it is being taught. Its practice is usually meant to help people who have trouble observing (taking note of) subtle mental phenomena. If you are not having any trouble noticing these subtle phenomena, then the practice itself can become annoying or distracting. In which case, it is better to stop using it altogether.
When you have to stop briefly in your mental observation to come up with a word, this holds you back (interrupts you) from making progress in the direction in which you were proceeding, which may have been a very fruitful direction had you not been distracted from continuing to follow it. The distraction may have even "bumped" your progress toward whatever insight or observation you were on track to discover that now it has completely slipped your mind and observation. Are you beginning to see how detrimental to one's practice that this business of noting can be?
I have experimented with this practice myself and speak from experience. Noting is an innovation that was developed by the Burmese monk Mahasi Sayadaw. He used it in teaching his householder lay practitioners who were having difficulty in discerning subtle phenomena. This practice helped them to become able to notice phenomena more clearly as it was occurring during the early stages of their meditation training, so he continued to use and recommend its use.
However, it is not always necessary, depending upon the individual. If you want to continue using this practice, here is a suggestion that may help make it more palatable. When you come across a phenomenon that you notice, simply make a quick mental note (without verbalizing it) and continue on. In other words, just recognized that you have recognized what just occurred, and continue on. In the discourses this is called "knowing." For example, from the
Satipatthana Sutta (MN 10): "Here a monk knows a mind consciousness affected by lust as mind affected by lust; and a mind consciousness unaffected by lust, as unaffected by lust..." It is just an inner knowing (or recognition) that takes place. See?
This way, noting should not become a distracting practice.
Jason Emmanuel Snyder:
Now a description of my practice today and the stages I feel like I might have traversed.
At a certain point my awareness felt very refined, I started cycling through the different sense gates - in hearing for example, I could follow multiple continuous sound vibrations at once and still notice discrete sounds as they came. While doing this I started incorporating body sensations, thoughts, and feelings. Occasionally I would drill down into one sense gate and maybe one particular area and after a while widen back out. I knew exactly which were thoughts and which were body sensations. Everything felt alive. Everything became less content oriented and more energetic. "Mind and Body" or "A & P"?
To answer your question: you were aware of the arising and passing away of mental and physical phenomena. This is good. It means that you are on track to develop a deeper practice using insight meditation.
Jason Emmanuel Snyder:
Then after a certain point my neck became stiff and I got thrown off a bit. "Cause and Effect"? Then I noticed some distinct pains in my knees, and also a certain anxiety came over me, a feeling that "I want this to end" and "I need to rest". I then shifted into some direct inquiry approaches. I started asking: "who wants this to end"? and "who is feeling this pain"? and "where am I". In other words I started directly undermining the perception of myself as somebody having this experience. This led to the last few minutes where I calmed down and kind of spaced out a bit, I became relaxed and peaceful.
So I am wondering if I was possibly cycling through the first few stages of insight. The skeptical part of me suspects that this was all part a parcel of the "Mind and Body" first stage and I am making too big a deal out of this.
Perhaps. At least in a minimal way. Richard Zen's comment regarding observing phenomena with the three characteristics in mind (and so forth) is more to the point, though, so keep that in mind when you are seeking confirmation of observation of the "stages of insight."