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RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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I don't know. From what I can gather most people are fairly happy not to examine "absolute reality". Many people wouldn't recongnize such a thing. This doesn't make sense since all figures take...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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At least you recognize it as a pessimistic assessment. ;) At times, I've had a similarly cynical position (though always more so when in the dark night). I remember at one point talking to Daniel...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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I used to have a real burning desire to communicate what I was doing with my wife or even my older children. That's a relatively common but also an immature urge I now believe. They don't care....
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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I've never felt compelled to tell people that "I am a meditator"--rather, the issue is trying to get anyone--usually my financee--to understand why you are trying to find "alone time". "I am having...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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I think it is more productive to ask, "How do you respond to honest questions from someone who doesn't necessarily have the model to accept a response?" There are people who think meditation is...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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I guess I have a different angle on it, Nathan. I'm happy to let people use whatever model they have "up there" as an explanation of what I'm doing. Usually I tell them it's a way to relax. If they...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Oh, I'm not even talking about models of enlightenment here necessarily, I just mean I feel like most of the time people ask those questions they're doing it expecting a particular answer that I...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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The vast majority of people who ask me about meditation (all six out of seven of them) aren't expecting a detailed answer. They're looking, I believe, for reassurance that I'm not weird or they're...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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"I just like to do it". The same response is given to people who question my motives for not eating meat, for listening to my kind of music, for reading the books I read, for dressing the way I do,...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Joseph Goldstein has some thoughts on all of this: http://meaningoflife.tv/video.php?speaker=goldstein&topic=complete
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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That's a nice interview. Thanks, Chris, for posting the link. The "why meditate" bits start at 32 minutes, for those who don't want to watch the whole thing (recommended, though). Cheers, Florian
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Author: adammorse I'm actually writing under my husband's log in, so hello all, this is Megan writing, not Adam. Adam showed me this discussion thread and it comes so perfectly timed because just...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Hi Megan, welcome to the Dharma Overground. (To avoid confusion, I think it would be best if you set up a login here for yourself.) The kinds of tension you describe sound very familiar to me....
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Hi Megan, Welcome. So far as a I can tell, there are many people who have a very dedicated relationship to meditation and who have amazing partnerships with those that don't share their interest....
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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So, I guess I'm sharing this with you, because I suspect what I would be looking for (by and large) would be some form of understanding from my partner. Obviously, that doesn't have to equal you...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Good points. However, there's a wider frame of meaning and purpose of which meditation is just an expression. The other partner may be expressing that same wider passion in a different way. I don't...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Hello, Megan! What you describe is almost identical to the spats and "discussions" I used to have with my wife. We couldn't get on the same page about my desire to practice and she has little,...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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"... a relationship can be viewed as a platform for moving beyond one's obsessions, while pursuing the discipline nonetheless." Hokai, that is perfectly said - you must have some experience ;-)...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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I'm really glad you said this. I'm being critical and I hope that people don't take this personally, but I think there is almost an obligation to give anyone who asks about our practice a little...
RE: What Do You Tell Them?
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Reading my earlier comments here, I realize what I meant to discuss was the questions people would ask me about going on retreat rather than practice. If I said, "I am glad for a chance to go on...
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