Hi,
Since my primary language isn't english, I had misinterpreted the haietmoba slightly. It did have some impact the past few weeks, put the difference once I saw the mistake was quite powerful.
What I had translated it into and understood as, was to ask "how am I experiencing this moment of (so far so good, but then...) live".
Now you english folk make the difference of the meaning of the words life and live pretty complex, and this is the last place to get into that. But when I say live at the end of the question, I mean live as a given. Just "that's live, that's what all the people say."
But then I realized the actual thing was to focus on being alive. This is a whole different perspective. It's not focusing on life/live (?? argh

) as in "all around you".
But it's on the being alive.
This is a powerful difference.