Cedric in Miami, FL.:
I was just doing some walking meditation and some insight regarding self/no-self personality/impersonality arose. It occurred to me. I am not mine, the I is not mine, I don't own me/I. Phenomena that arise aren't mine and are impersonal. So, consistent with that insight, I ask myself the question: If I am not mine, how much less are a would be wife and or child mine? I don't know maybe that is crazy and maybe there is value and wholesomeness to having wife and child beyond the delusional clinging to them as mine.
I am no advanced practitioner... far from it! I'm just starting out!
But my opinion is that you should just do what you think is best. If it doesn't harm anyone, then why not start a family?
I daresay the world could use more enlightened parents. Teaching, as is often the case with parent-child relationships, tends to be one of the most fulfilling experiences that this "real" world has to offer. Share your insights with your children so that they can build a better future and so that they too can become enlightened.
Having children and a family will test you in in ways that you would never even have dreamed about and you might come out of it wiser and better for it. They say that the best tests of spiritual progress are not how many visions or how holy or wise you claim to be, but by how you deal with the day-to-day difficulties and how meaningful your interpersonal relationships are. Applying what you've learned in a very "real" world manner is where the challenge is at, in my experience.
In short, try to live the life you feel best exemplifies the person you would like to be. Consider it part of your "morality" training in addition to your insight and wisdom practice. Remember that the Buddha didn't just stop at becoming enlightened himself. He wanted everyone else to experience that, too. If being a monk helps you in that goal, then by all means. If being a layperson helps, then by all means. Size up your particular talents and see where you can do the most good to the world.