I believe that I have recently started to reach equanimity in my meditation and wanted to get a second opinion from the more
experienced folks here at the DhO.

A bit of background:
It's quite likely that I passed the A&P through drugs use 10 years ago (I posted a separate thread about this here: http://www.dharmaoverground.org/web/guest/discussion/-/message_boards/message/1172841). During the next 10 years I
practiced several different disciplines, including hatha yoga, kundalini yoga, ashtanga yoga, chi kung and various forms of
concentration meditation whilst trying to deal with the dark night like symptoms I was experiencing. I tended to flit from one thing to the other quite a lot when the going got tough and stopped practicing completely a couple of times, so my progress through these disciplines has been somewhat limited. About a year ago I read The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, which turned me onto buddhist practices. I began meditating using the instructions from this book for short periods every day (usually around 10 minutes).
I discovered MCTB last summer and decided to focus my practice on achieving access concentration and the samatha jhanas, so that I would be ready to begin vipassana and get out of the dark night. In October last year I started to hit the first, second and third jhanas fairly consistently (I resolved not to get fourth because I wasn't keen on unleashing any siddhis at that time but felt I could have got it if I wanted) and decided it was time to start vipassana. Things seemed to move quite quickly and I had very noticeable symptoms of the three characteristics nana - aching muscles and a really tight jaw arose one meditation and stayed with me for a few days (I must have looked like a bit of a weirdo when I was talking!). Since then I think I have re-passed the A&P twice. Once in early November then again in early January after some backsliding due to a reduced practice over the Xmas period. I've also had some fairly difficult dark nighting in between.
The past couple of months, I have increased my practice schedule. I now do 1 vipassana noting mahasi style sit in the morning for 40-45mins. I have a added a samatha sit in the evening using a Yantra as a kasina object for 20 mins and I've started to do walking meditations on my lunch break, usually around 30mins. I also try to practice as much as possible in daily life but this is difficult because I work with computers and it requires fairly
intense concentration on what i am doing in order to solve problems. I do note when I go to the bathroom etc.
This past week I feel that I have reached equanimity a couple of times in my meditation but it seems to slide back to re-observation as the day wears on and I haven't managed to get a foothold as yet to make it my centre of gravity. My general experience while meditating is:
- I begin noticing the sensations where my body contacts the floor.
- After a while my attention is brough upwards to my upper body and head as it feels that the energy has moved upward. Noting becomes easier at this point and it's fairly rapturous, which I suspect is A&P?
- This tends to give way to an uneasy feeling, with tightness in my throat and chest. (early DN?)
- Folowing this is fast, harsh vibrations that seem rather disjointed and irrating. They remind me of white noise. (late DN?)
In the past week the fast, harsh vibrations have smoothed out and it's like a big space opens up, full of calm and serenity. The space feels huge, as if I was standing in front of the hoover dam or some other wide open space. I become more intrested in the sounds in the background and note the different frequencies of my buzzing radiator and the different engine noises from the cars that drive past. There have been times when distances seem to get a bit arbitrary and it's difficult to localise the sounds in space.
No-Self seems like the most interesting of the 3Cs to investigate at this stage and I have been adding some 'who am i' investigation. I noticed that my consciousness seems to be located in my head and chest, so I was playing around with moving it into my legs and other areas of my body. I had a realisation that my consciousness only exists because
it has sensations to notice. This was an intellectual realisation but interesting nonetheless.
In my daily life I feel kind of 'normal' again. I still seem to feel angry, jealous, annoyed, irritated etc but it doesn't feel as much of a problem and tends not to linger as much as it normally would. I can see why people could get comfortable at this stage and stop practicing as it feels really good compared with dark night.
Does this line up with your experiences of equanimity?
Does anyone have any tips to stop the backsliding - Is it just a case of practicing consistently and skillfully?
Is there anything special required to reach high equanimity?
Thank you if you've read this fairly long post!