| | I ended up taking the afternoon off to practice and I will intensify my for the weeks coming. It seems that I lost some momentum I had after crossing the A&P a few days ago. It wasn't the first time I crossed it but but this time enough reprogramming happened in my brain to leave me stable in dissolution. All the tension I had before the A&P disappeared instantly. I had good momentum and I experienced terror quite a few time, especially when things get weird visually.
It seems that there is three modes to dissolution: In the first mode things feel pretty normal except that I'm lost in my thoughts a lot. In the second mode, my mind is very quiet and I feel embedded in my environment. I feel heavy and has no wish to move. In the third mode, I start to have all kind of weird phenomena, vibrations, distortion, foggy vision, etc. This mode open the door to fearful events.
I do everything to remain aware as much as possible. In MCTB, Daniel says that it get harder to sit for long period of time during dissolution but my sitting time is still pretty good. I get to stabilize in some jhana after some time so it helps.
In this post (http://dharmaoverground.org/web/guest/discussion/-/message_boards/message/155171) Daniel give some instruction on how to deal with the dark night. He recommend to not getting too tense. It can be hard sometimes in dissolution to follow this advice since we get lost in thoughts so easily before getting into a jhana, or even when getting into one. I guess some moderation and occasional tension cannot hurt... |