Hello everyone and thank you for reading.
This is my practice log and it has the obvious purposes of allowing:
- For others to read - this has the benefit of allowing others to guide me and to be guided by me.
- For me to read - which may motivate and remind me of what I passed through.
Therefore, if you find something interesting here and want to know more, please ask. Also, if you can add something helpful, please do so.
Initially I will describe how I got interested in buddhism and meditation, then I will give a background on how my practice has been developing.
My aim is to post at least 3 times a week, the more the merrier.
--
My interest in buddhism goes back to when I was about 15-16 (I am 20 now), when I got interested a little bit in meditation and other explorations of the mind such as lucid dreams etc. Unfortunately I didn't find much to go on and was not interested enough to be a real practitioner back then.
About one year ago, though, my interest came back in a much stronger way. It didn't start with buddhism itself, but with general 'philosophy' along with psychedelics (what a nice mix).
I was often with a friend who is quite intelligent and on late summer and through autumn of 2013 we had some life-changing experiences, not 100% mystical in nature. We would spend afternoons tripping on LSD while walking through a park or maybe downtown, simply observing with awe the shattered reality which is the psychedelic experience. After walking we usually went to a pub nearby and talked about the nature of the mind, of the universe, of society, of arts and related things.
At that time I began to discover that I am not a separate being, that my mind is not disconnected with the outside and that the world has a much more beautiful aspect to it than I thought possible. Although at that time I didn't put it on these terms, I guess I would have agreed with that previous statement back then.
Around October of 2013 I started listening to Alan Watts' audio lessons, which actually I strongly recommend to anyone. The things he said would 95% of the time explain something that I was aware of but hadn't quite got the grips of what it was. In simpler terms, Alan Watts' lessons untangled my view of the world.
Therefore I started getting more interested in buddhism and meditation. My practice would basically consist on sitting and get lost in thought while trying not to get lost in thought. The reason for this, I think, is that I didn't have a clear goal nor method on meditation because I had not yet found guidance which really resonated with me. It was rare the occasions that I did practice, although I remember some occasions when I felt a very strong bliss during meditation back then.
--
After reading MCTB things changed. This book changed completely my course in life (if I am to say such thing). Daniel's concise writing with undogmatic approach and powerful statements strongly resonated with what I had been finding during the 4~6 months of self exploration prior to reading it.
Therefore, I suddenly found myself with this goldmine in hands. It provided me with all the material necessary to reboot my approach of cushion-time, retuning the settings and rebalancing my efforts. Also, having a clear goal: enlightment, and knowing it is possible, renewed my faith.
--
I started working right away on setting my Morality right, getting grips with my daily life and transforming my relationships with the world and with myself onto something I was proud of. This instantly affected my practice: my thoughts got to a 'less sticky' consistence, gradually becoming something which I could simply let go of since I knew that my way on living life was on the right tracks.
Regarding the cushion-time, my first objective was to consistently reach 1st jhana with breathing techniques.
After some weeks of half-assed practice (about 30 mins a day, 3 to 4 times a week) I was comfortable on reaching 1st jhana.
Then I worked on solidifying that state further. I got there a few times, with strong concentration on the breath and highly blissful states, but my practice started to be even more sparse for I was busy with college and other stuff, which is not really and excuse, since I could have found the time.
Fast forwarding a little bit, some weeks ago I started vipassana practice. At first I was not very comfortable with it as I was with samathi, in such way that I was not finding the cushion time as productive as I knew it could be. After reviewing some chapters of MCTB Part 1 I was back on track and my meditation started to regain speed.
My last few practices consisted of rising in concentration with the breath as object into a solid samathi jhana and then begin investigating the present moment with noting practice. Usually, I start noting the rising and falling of the breath and then begin to add other sensations that are being shown. After some time I usually drop the noting and stay with the present moment as it shows itself, being mindful of whatever my attention gets contact with.
I have been able to easily detect vibrations on my body while meditating, more so in the hands, which sometimes I try to sync with and notice every component of the vibration, other times I keep noticing it but choose to not place too much attention.
With this background, I begin my practice log.