| | Author: Check_Username Forum: Dharma Overground Discussion Forum
So I've recently decided again, for the third or fourth time, that it's seriously time for Intensive retreat practice. Would love some insight into the last few things I couldn't figure out in preparation.
I've managed to figure out how to stay seated until my timer dings through most pain I've encountered so far, but find mucus is still a problem. As in, I have some annoying allergies and it sort of pool at the exact worst possible place in the back of my throat, very difficult to ignore very long, and if I manage to keep at it a bit of course after a while I either can't breathe or the gag reflex or nausea start to kick in. I almost vomit every day while brushing my tongue, even just the back teeth sometimes. This requires a bit of a snort to clear up. In addition to periodically breaking my flow (though less and less each time, apparently...), I'm afraid of bothering other meditators.
I've been mixing up techniques in single sittings when trying to prolong my sitting time, in preparation for the barrage of 1hour sessions. Is this stupid, since I'll have to stick to just one at an actual retreat? Little bit of ADD going here, arduous work pushing "unbearable" further and further back. Particularly with the shamatha bit; much easier to go longer with rapid fire noting.
Now, on rapid fire noting, I think I might be doing it wrong. I haven't been able to really notice many individual instances of each sensation arising and passing, and it ends up feeling like I'm just using it as a mantra, almost completely drowning out the original object. I shouldn't be trying to force the sensations to flicker by noting as if they did, should I? Do I just pick a broader area and try to move awareness between different points as fast as I can and note that?
I've started reading Daniel's MCTB again, and would appreciate any additional insight. Thanks. |