Alexx alexxx:
Did Buddha really say that lay practitioners should avoid sexual activity ? I never heard of any such thing. None of us here have shed the householders life and taken up the ochre robes as far as I know. It is my understanding that the Vinaya was put in place to regulate the behavior of bhikkhus so that the Sangha could achieve the optimum state of harmony. In other words they were rules put in place in order to keep order in a situation where hundreds or thousands of monks were living in close quarters. They were not general rules to apply to all human beings across the board. I feel that the idea that the Vinaya should apply to lay practitioners is a result of the christianization of the doctrine, or perhaps just plain old warping and misunderstanding of the doctrine over the ages.
Please re-read this:
The idea of budhism, simplified goes like this: every effect has a cause. You exist right now because of a cause. Because of this same cause you existed before and will exist again, until the cause is extinguished and you will exist no more, thus be in nirvana. That cause is attachment and the whole point of budhism and meditation is to get free from attachment. Suffering originates from attachment.
Attachment or clinging is not the result of contact with sensuality, it is the result of ignorance of the nature of all dhammas. An awareness of the how all phenomena bear the three marks of existence can grow in your consciosuness without completely withdrawing oneself from pleasant sensory phenomena, this is a fact. In other words it's possible to eat pleasant tasting food without misapprehending the experience, and without allowing ignorance to ensnare you, the same applies to sexuality. It does take practice. If you feel that at your stage in the practice it is too difficult for you then perhaps that alone is good reason to avoid pleasant sensory contact, but as you progress in the practice you will not have to fear these things.

Alexx alexxx:
Sex is to be avoided like any other pleasure, like drugs, money or jhanic pleasures. To get from one jhana to another in concentration meditation you have to renounce more and more and in the 4th jhana it is no pleasure or pain, unlike the first jhana witch is the biggest pleasure that you can experience in this world. The budha thaught the patch of renunciacion and as far as I know neather budha nor jesus or any other extraordinary human been had girlfriends, money, drugs etc. The whole point of budhism is renounciacion, seen the emptiness in all things throught insight meditation in order to renounce them.
Buddha taught that the path to the dissolution of dukkha is within dukkha. In other words the practice consists of choosing progressively more skillful objects to cling to (jhanas) until finally at the very end you stop clinging to all objects. Therefor you should indeed cling to jhanas, they are skillful states of mind that cause very little suffering. They are the skillful abodes of the Noble ones.
Jesus was married and I believe he was initiated into the tantric Mysteries described elsewhere in this thread. I believe that water in the bible is a reference to sexuality. Jesus walking on water was an allegory of Jesus' mastery over the sexual waters. I think that the ritual of baptism represents the transmutation of sexual energy.

"And the companion of the savior is Mary Magdalene. He loved her more than
all the disciples and used to kiss her often on the mouth. The rest of the
disciples were offended. They said to him, Why do you love her more than
us? The savior replied in this way: [You had better ask] Why dont I love
you the way I love her?"
-Gospel of Philip (NLH II, 3, 63.32 64.5)
The kissing incident in this Nag Hammadi scripture dislodges the old belief that Jesus was chaste of carnal love, and allows for other options, other things to believe about the savior. Under the impact of this new material the mind reels and we are left speculating wildly: either Jesus was divine and carnally active, or he was not divine after all, or if he was carnally involved with Mary Magdalene and was indeed divine, their sexual relation may have been somehow sacred, or she herself may have been a divine incarnation; or, on the other hand, if both she and he were mere mortals, they may have been man and wife, a married couple who shared a spiritual mission, or she may as a mortal woman have offered her sexuality to Jesus in a sacramental act with an incarnated god, if Jesus was indeed such a god, or even if he was merely a man, but a man blessed with a special mission by God, then his intimacy with Magdalene may have been instrumental in his fulfilling that mission....
The mind toggles rapidly between narrative (Jesus kissing Magdalene) and belief (carnal love is sinful, or it isn't), back again to narrative (Jesus prefers Magdalene above his male followers) and again to belief (women can be spiritually superior to men, or they can't), again to narrative (God sent his only begotten son from heaven) and to belief (the Incarnation did not involve human sexuality, or it does), and so on through many issues. The sexuality of Jesus is the denial of his divinity, according to some arguments, yet it may be the proof of his humanity, according to others.
In Mary Magdalene: Christianity's Hidden Goddess, Lynn Picknett notes: "Although it is usually assumed that the Magdalene's message was indistinguishable from that of the New Testament, there are as we shall see good reasons to believe that was not so" (p. 95). Despite the anticipation she sets up, Picknett does not deliver even a rough sketch of what the message of Magdalene might have been. Typically, Picknett ranges across the usual slew of clues, including Cathars, Templars, the John the Baptist enigma, the Mandaeans, the Priory of Sion, etc., before veering around to the hot issue, sacred sexuality in Pagan religion. We are left supposing that Mary Magdalene taught the rites of sacramental sex, whatever that might mean.. I have reason to believe that I've 'uncovered' at least one of the key principles in these rites, as I've explained elsewhere in the thread relating to the orgasm
We can get into this if you want, but first I recommend studying what scholars know about the Magdalene as much as you can.
More on tantric sex in esoteric christianity here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JlKBIoAr9g
Alexx alexxx:
I think that if you choose to be sexual at all, then you should allow yourself the full expression of sexuality within the confines of what fits into your training in morality practice
"I think that if you chose to drink one beer at all, you should allow yourself the full use of all the drugs in the world withing the confines of what fits into your training in morality practice." That means hm..... everything except heroin ? Or maby even heroin just a couple of times to see how it is.
Well no the ingestion of intoxicating substances is a violation of the precepts while having sex, or eating pleasant tasting food is not a violation of the precepts. It's that simple.
Alexx alexxx:
help her achieve lasting happiness
Is sexual pleasure or a good husband a pleasure infinite in duration and also intensity ? Is at least one of you 2 imortal ? Even if both you 2 were imortal the pleasure is for sure a limited pleasure in intensity. Why is there necesary to not get attached to the pleasures of first jhana in order to progress to the second ? Why is there imposible to achieve the first jhana if you desire to achieve it ? Because only through renunciacion you can progress on the budhist path.
I'm sorry friend I think again you are mistaken, and you have it the exact opposite of what is true. It is impossible to attain the first jhana UNLESS you desire first to attain it. The desire for awakening is perhaps THE MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR to develop in all of buddhist practice.
Alexx alexxx:
you can go on almost indefinitely with this technique and you build chi
and the goal of this is ?
It is very important that the tremendous energy that gives mankind the ability to create be used efficiently because it is connected to the same energetic force that sustains the individual's own vitality. It is well known that the sexual energy is intimately related to the health of our psyche and our physical bodies. Not only is it necessary for sustaining physical vitality and thus the five physical senses, but also the vitality of the seven superior senses that unite mankind with the Divine.
Anyways I hope we can agree to disagree friend, I respect your viewpoint and I hope there are no hard feelings that I see it differently. Metta