| | I got this email and after a brief exchange it was decided to post the question here as it is a topic of practical relevance, as a VR can derail days or more of a retreat, as can its counterpart, the VV (Vipassana Vendetta).
Here's the original question copied from the email:
"Dear Mr. Ingram,
May I ask you one question? My name is Katrin, I work for the guardian and I want to write a small article about Vipassana Romance. Could yo tell me something about this phenomenon? Why does it happen? How often does it happen? How many people experience this? Did you experience it, too? How can I do to avoid it? I'm looking forward to hearing from you! Regards, Katrin
-- Katrin Schmiedekampf" of the Guardian, UK
I thought that more perspectives than mine would be of value, as I never came down with a full-blown VR, though I had a number of VV's (usually people who had very loud breathing who were sitting near me, one guy who snored loudly and kept me from sleeping).
Anyway, I thought that some could chime in, as this is a relatively common phenomenon.
As to my take on avoiding it: practice, keep your eyes down and on non-distracting objects, and realize that the chances you are right about how wonderful they are based on first impressions is low. Not much fun, but better than wasting days of a retreat on a fantasy.
Daniel |