Hi Brady
This is a trifle longer than I set out to write, but here it is

Brady Ehler:
The advice you give works well for the examples you give, but the examples you give prefigure arrogance from the speaker.
What happens when you're angry for a more justified reason?
What's the difference between arrogance and justification? Arrogance (to me) implies someone overly confident and closed to other perspectives. While feeling justified happens to provide confidence and results in being closed to other perspectives.
Think of a time when you felt arrogant, and think of a time when you felt justified. One comes from a first person perspective (thinking on your own behalf), and one comes from a third person perspective (thinking of how you must be coming across to someone else).
Let's keep perspective in perspective (hehe). It is just a complex set of thoughts. Promoting perspective to be more than just thought is where the problem begins. Does it seem to you that your perspective on the world IS the world or the way the world is?
Think about times you've been wrong and didn't know until later. I don't know about you but I'm frequently discovering I was wrong. I never know at the time, I thought something was true but it turned out to be false. Much of the time it may seem as though you are right. Does it ever seem as though you are wrong? I don't recall ever coming to that conclusion myself. The only times I think of myself as being wrong are from a third person perspective when I have been told I was wrong and I accepted that as true!
Another key ingredient for anger is the notion of importance. This is the want part of the equation. We want things because we have decided they are important to us. Without importance, anger does not arise. 'Should', 'need' and 'must' are watch words for detecting importance.
With importance, conscious thoughts become sticky and we can't ignore them so we can form a habit of acting upon them. Acting upon the things we take to be important makes them pass away.
With importance, subconscious thoughts are the beliefs which we react to almost unthinkingly when we get upset. These form a large part of our identity.
Brady Ehler:
Examples:
Why am I always alone? I deserve a girlfriend/boyfriend.
Why do I have this debilitating disease? I deserve to be healthy.
Deserve is another word for should. I 'should' have a girlfriend. Aside from it denoting its importance to us, what does this say exactly? That someone owes it to us? The universe? God? Our parents? Why would we deserve anything at all? Are those the people we should blame for a debilitating disease? Must we have someone to blame? Will that make it better or solve the problem?
It begins when the thought of a possibility occurs. I could have the girlfriend/boyfriend I do not have. I could be healthier than I am. Then importance arrives, and I start wanting things to be the way I have conceived of. The more I want it the more upset I become and the less chance I have at changing things. It's all happening in our imagination yet it's causing us real suffering.
That is a disempowering thinking pattern.
Consider an alternative. I can take responsibility for every decision I took leading up until this very moment, which is pretty much why I am where I am today. I have a choice to affect the future but that choice is now and I take full responsibility for making this choice myself under my own free will.
I cannot be healthier than I am right in this moment.
I cannot have a girlfriend/boyfriend right now because I do not have one.
If I want a girlfriend or boyfriend I can start taking chances - introduce myself to strangers, ask people on a date, try speed dating, whatever. What I can't do is change the past or make the present line up with my imagination.
Only right now do I have a choice. Right now I can accept things the way they are, and even make the most of them. If I am alone, it means I am free to meet someone new tonight. If I am unwell, it's better than being comatose or dead. If I am dying, I can make the most of every minute I have left. It may sound morbid but it's a simple fact of life that death is coming for every last one of us, whether we like it or not.
Mahatma Ghandi said "Be the change you want to see in the world"
Is there room for anger when we approach life in this way?
Craig