Benjamin Turale:
So here I am, in a place finally where I am able to observe all phenomena as phenomena pretty consistently. Here is what I'd really appreciate some enlightened perspectives on (from you guys - the cyberspace sangha). This is the best I've been able to explain it so far.
I did a 21 day retreat where I told myself 'bugger it, I'm just going to watch everything'. And I got into some interesting territory.
Now, after more and more practise in my daily sitting, I can stay in the present pretty darn well. I can move with things as they speed up, slow down, and the general curveballs that maya seems to throw. I know every phenomena is new (thus, anicca) because I have to keep renewing my awareness every second to the present. My practise every moment is like going 'here. here. here.' with my attention.
I worry though that what I'm doing is samatha practise - because Dan mentions in his book that we can develop concentration by observing reality and extending the illusion of solidarity, rather than observing it fall away. Also because this practise tends to lead me to tranquility, sometimes weird rapture.... I feel a bit stuck, not knowing if I'm doing samatha or vipassana. I know I can just "observe the stuckness" but I'd really like to know if something is wrong in my approach because otherwise I'm just wasting my time. This brings me to the point of noting and what is essential - I quote Mahasi - "never verbally repeat the words 'rising, falling', and do not think of rising and falling as words. Be aware only of the actual process of rising and falling movement of the abdomen".
Hi Ben,
I'm not a strict Mahasi Sayadaw follower (although I have used his instruction when it seemed to coincide with what we find available in the suttas), so you may want to take what I have to say with a grain of salt. On the other hand, if it makes sense, you may want to include it in your knowledge base. From your description above, it sounds as though your practice is coming along quite well.
Benjamin Turale:
So, lets define 'aware'. The best stab I'm going to take at it is 'experiencing and knowing that you experience in the moment'. That's what I'm doing. Is that vipassana, just seeing? Or am I developing concentration? Help me guys!
You are using both in developing both. Without the concentration, you wouldn't be able to discern phenomena all that clearly. And without discernment, you wouldn't know how to stay in and increase concentration in order to "see" phenomena. Although with regard to your statement in the above quotation (highlighted in red), what you are developing is vipassana (discernment) with the help of samatha (calmness, which fosters concentration). Does that make sense? So, for the most part, you are developing insight. It's just that it is being developed with the aid of calmness. This represents a perfect balance to your practice.
This process is better explained in an essay by Thanissaro Bhikku (
One Tool Among Many). You may want to take a look at that essay and see if it doesn't describe your experience and thereby answer some of your concerns.
The following quote from the essay explains this process quite vividly. Thanissaro is writing about the use of the terms "vipassana" and "samatha" in the discourses. The "they" he is referring to are the Pali discourses themselves: "In the few instances where they do mention vipassana, they almost always pair it with samatha — not as two alternative methods, but as two qualities of mind that a person may 'gain' or 'be endowed with,' and
that should be developed together."
In essence what I'm endeavoring to communicate to you is that you have no need to worry about the things you are worried about. What you are experiencing is perfectly in keeping with how the practice is to be developed. Keep up the good work!
In peace,
Ian