fivebells .:
This is dullness, which as it happens is being discussed over
here this week. I notice that your first post talked about observing thoughts. Do you also attend to physical sensations? Attending to all six sensations at once is often a fast way out of dullness, for me.
In fact I use to pay more atention to the breath, physical sensations, where sometimes I recognice some thoughts coming, specially in the times between inspiration and expiration (when the air is not passing through my throat). I noticed also how if I want to pay attention equally to my physical and psychic sensations, I mean, not closing the atention so much to one object, is more difficult. Even if Im paying atention only to physyc sensations, its difficult to open my awareness beyond my breath without loosing some precission and speed.
Yesterday I was focusing on my breath and I was having very good concentration. I was only sitting and experiencing just the present moment all the time, very cool. So I decided to mix two objects at the same time: I started to hit the floor with two finguers, trying to be aware of every hit at the moment, and at the same time trying to be aware also of the breathing. It was like I could pay attention quite deeply to one object and the several sensations that it has, and then I had to change to the other object to perceive the sensations of this other, but it was difficult to mix both. I mean, I think the perfect way of doing it is perceiving several sensations, one after one, but from both objects mixed.
fivebells .:
When the observation is clear and stable, the next step is further insight practice. When you see an identification, what collection of sensations is construed as the identification? Are they stable? What is experiencing the identification?
When I see identification, It use to happens when Im doing another exercice (the one I talked about in the other post 'What is happening to me'). Its quite simple, I think about one situation, person, memory..., and an identification comes automatically. Its very easy to see it because some sensation of suffering, or joy comes with it, sometimes deeper than others. For example: I think about last night in the bar and how this girl rejected me, even laughing about me. Obiously some thoughts of suffering comes and its very easy so relate this suffering to it. You feel ridiculous. You automatically question your skills as a lover, you feel yourself maybe ugly. You lost your confidence by some moments, while you think about it.
Sometimes is not so obvious because you think about something and this feelings come with it, and you dont know how are they related, why i feel bad when I think about it.
Other example is you go to some friends house and you automatically take a role in that situation, in comparation with the others, this role is changing constantly. But sometimes I pay atenttion to this and I can stop it in real time. I mean, I notice the identification Im having in the moment and I reject it intellectually.
Its hard...