I've been playing with some of
these instructions this week, especially the business about grooving on sensations, fakin' it until you're makin' , making believe I'm in vacation/somewhere exotic, stopping to smell the roses to the max, that sort of thing. No PCE yet, but I find it puts me in a marvelous mood (guessin' that's what you kids call an "EE", right?), so I don't really mind.
And when I say "marvelous mood", I mean it puts a smile on my face, it makes me friendly toward people, it makes me less resentful, it makes me happy to be alive, it makes me feel like I'm appreciating things more, it makes me feel like I'm living more intensely, and it just makes me happy.
Ironically, I think these are the sorts of reasons many of us got into Buddhist meditation in the first place: wanting to be here more, wanting to miss less. It would be great to experience the PCE again, but honestly I'm happy with what I've accomplished so far.
Also, doing this gives me a better sense of humor, not just about external events, but internal ones, as well. I know it's very anti-AF, but if some dark or mean thought passes through my mind while I'm doing this, I often find it really funny. Thankfully we're in the age of smartphones, so if someone sees me laughing out loud for no apparent reason, they just assume I'm reading something funny on the internet.
The only problem with this is that it takes energy, and it feels a little exhausting at times or like it takes too much energy to get it going. If I can push myself to start taking things in again, it gets some momentum, and there's less effort required. Though I find that in the hours after lunch, I'm inclined to just allow myself to be in a spaced-out or even negative mood rather than give the push. So I'll watch that and see if I find some ways around it or if I just get in the habit of pushing through that.
Some of
this stuff is inspiring, too.
I'm not terribly interested in AF. I am in favor of being more present-centered and enjoying being alive, though. So I'm finding this practice useful.