| | Hello ,i just completed my first month since i restarted noting practice ,and i think i am in 3rd nana ,and i need some advise,encouragement and motivation ,Let me write down what i feel ,please have a look
1) Intense Pain is been the feature ,i have pain in one side of the body,either at head (it will spread to whole of the head at times) ,or at shoulder ,or chest
2) The 3 characteristics are really dominant ,like the pain is always unsatisfactory ,its changing,and i am trying to see no-self on those with no luck
3) At Morning times ,i am pretty comfortable ,i have high equanimity and bliss ,and i do my formal sitting at that time,and when the day progress i tend to be on an anxiety side as the pain described above will affect my mind . At the time of evening i feel bit relaxed (not that high equanimity as morning time) and i do the formal sitting or walking practice
***my practice is like starting with samatha ,and investigating the sensations after 15 minutes or so***
4) Apart from formal sittings ,i tends to note my pain which is dominant in my body (these days more of a head ache ,which was succeeded by chest pain and shoulder pain)
i tend to watch the feeling ,trying to split the physical and mental component of the pain ,hacking vedana method by Nickolai etc,but the pain dominates ,and i surrender to it (or tries to)
Now like 6 months back (at that time i didn't had that much idea about the maps) ,i tried noting practice (not intense or aggressive) ,and i reached a similar stage with intense headache ,which was diagnosed as sinus headache and i developed a small rise in hypertension ,so unconsciously i stopped practice,and my pain eventually gone away .
So all these sensations re -appearing after i re-started my practice
What i initially thought the experiences i had 6 month's back was dark night (After reading MCTB clearly,and since i had lucid dreams ,out of the body experience etc i thought i passed A&P) ,and when i restarted my practice i was in a high bliss ,equanimity state where i thought it would be an end of re-observation and starting of Knowledge of Equanimity of Formations
But soon the old monkey came up ,and i am passing through all sorts of similar physical/mental pain i passed through 6 months back,and while going through some old posts in DhO i really starting to think like am in Three Characteristics State
So i really need help to get past ,My urge to realize is here as it is,but this physical/mental stuff is really hurting
Do i need to do any specific noting in this stage?,and i would like to hear what kind of stuff you guys had in this stage,so that i will feel like i am not alone ,Thanks r0ny |