Hey all.
From hitting SE back in July, on Friday I think did MCTB 4th path, done is what had to be done. (Prior to this I have been sitting daily for probably 2-3 years). Basically I noted my way to 1st and 2nd, exactly like in MCTB, then switched to a truckload of other practices, basically anything that felt creative and useful. Namely self-inquiry, visiting a non-dual guru type, tarin's way of doing 2nd, creative writing exercises, watching loads of youtube, books, artistic self-belief exercises, meditative contemplation of sutras and writings (in a koan-like way), magick, going on phase of spiritual tourism, a bit of mahasi noting and choiceless awareness, and a lot of walking around doing my own imagination practices.
Finally on Friday I feel like I fully realized that "in the seen, only the seen, has always ever been only the seen, will always ever be only the seen, for everyone, whether enlightened or not", I could understand fully what it means to say "everyone is enlightened, whether they realise it yet or not", at that moment something popped, and my state since then has been characterised by a seemingly total lack of sense of agency (no-ONE in particular trying to do anything, just many instances of doing), lack of ability to really believe in any idea or thought of "doer", and a sudden and total drop away of the huge existential seeking drive which dominated my life for the past 3-5 years. And also zero self-conflict drag, despite being in stressful or indecisive situations. The word mindfulness as understood previously just doesn't make sense anymore. I am 80% sure it's done, but open to accept ideas that it isn't and I am tricking myself.
Why I am I writing this? Well I do quite like talking about myself

But seriously I feel there is a lot of a value in posting achievements, esp quick one or ones that use different techniques, as it inspires others into what's possible out there.
but also aware that I wrote a bit on what I think was
My SE experience and noone replied at all, which led me to believe that I guess what I wrote wasn't particularly useful or interesting to anyone... so I will put it out there, is anyone remotely interested in hearing anything about my experience? (it's ok if you're not

)
1. does anyone want to ask questions to check out/diagnose/ see if I am deluding myself? I would really welcome/appreciate this.
2. My approach was pretty eclectic and I feel that all the tools I pulled off the shelf helped smash this thing, so maybe there might be somethings in there for people.
3. I see now that for me, the core of this thing was really all about self-belief, and the techniques are relevant only in they suited my mind and my belief system, and created the chance for insight to occur. I think that some practitioners could do with more tools to work with their belief systems.
4. I think it's all a very interesting story, as it happened to me! but then I would think that

and thank you to everyone here, very heartfelt! as I am feeling full of gratitude right now. especially those here who post a lot and Daniel for MCTB.
Much love, Anthony