Jason Snyder:
I grew up in the Baha'i Faith, which is a theistic tradition which has its roots in Islam but became independent. One thing that is emphasized is the soul (same as in other Western traditions, thought of as a unique individual non-physical identifyer) that continues on its spiritual journey after this life (approaching heaven or hell). While I am no longer a Baha'i, I still carry deep emotional roots of having a soul. This is why I have asked a few other questions pertaining to "not-self", because every time I feel like I am getting close to some kind of cessation, I partially draw back, out of fear of losing my "soul" thus becoming unsavable (like in a Christian sense).
I know this is an irrational, I have heard people make the fine grain distinction between "not-self" and "no-self", and I understand that the self that Buddhists deny is the one that can be noticed as a sensation, not necessarily the "soul". I also suspect that this deep seeting emotional attachment to a soul is something that I just need to confront more and see through, etc.
Has anybody else struggled with this kind of thing? Particularly those who grew up in a Western tradition believing in a "soul". What is your take on how the "self" that should be seen as illusory relates to the "soul" as something eternal, unique, but non-physical/non-sensation based?
Yes, I have felt the fear and terror directly. The answer to the Universe is #42, Rule #42 is: When experiencing the dissolution of the soul into an ever expanding realm of infinity, use mindfulness to drop the fear before it arises, and remain equanimous at all costs. If you fail at this crucial juncture, Fear and Terror will arise, and you will have to ride it out and watch is fade away, or use some other means to ground yourself.
Also, if one has previously developed jhanas and/or big mindfulness to a stable point of equanimity, fear and terror won't arise, or can be dismissed/abandoned.
Also, each time one reaches this juncture in practice they can "push" themselves a little farther, deveoping courage and strength from the fact "you" seem to come back anyway, so what was so bad?
Losing the Soul. For me, it helps to realise through wisdom that I am made up of atoms and energy that has been around and passed around for billions of years, this is , for me anyway, a basic scientific fact, and the atoms and energy that this organism has now are ever exchanging themselves with other atoms and energy.
Use a Small Sand Dune (or Sand Castle) as a Metaphor for the Self. The Small Sand Dune is made of sand from the beach, it came about due to causes and effects, it is made of sand from the surrounding beach. Eventually, the Small Sand Dune will erode and flatten out or blow away, yet the sand is still there just as it always was.
And as the Sand Dune was never really separate from the sand on the beach, neither are we ever really separate from the Ocean of Cosmic Dust, which we call the Universe.
If you are actually asking for confirmation of whether there is a Creator God, or a Heaven of Hell, and that you are going to lose your soul to hell in an everlasting damnation for practicing a wholesome spiritual path, for that I have no answers.
Psi Phi