Zendo Calrissian:
This thread has been very useful to me. Keep posting!
Glad to hear it. Enlightenment is a team sport, after all.
Droll Dedekind:
When I was in this territory I threw nearly every technique I had at it. I experimented constantly with tuning the effort up or down. Though, sticking with my practice was probably the hardest lesson at this stage, and still is when I'm in EQ.
I agree with Jen on not underestimating the power of resolutions. Notice the subtle difference between desire/craving and resolve/will. Try making a strong resolve that resonates with you at the start of every sit. Become absolutely convinced that you'll get SE soon. Then, during your sit, act on that resolve by not wondering about progress. If you're truly convinced SE isn't far away, then there's no need to wonder.
That's basically been my MO. It's kinda like a craftsman working in his shop; he'll grab and use this tool for a little bit, set it down and pick up that tool, then step back and contemplate for a minute. Some of the tools I've been using, in no particular order: body scanning, noting, direct inquiry (who am I?), doing nothing, following the breath, searching for hidden processes, disolving chunky sensations, letting go, and probably some others. Though it sounds eclectic and all over the place, my sits have actually felt pretty productive, and so I'm not super angsty about not getting SE right away... though it would be nice.
As for resolutions, I've taken and used this advice, but it always feels ingenuine when I make them. Like I hear the thoughts making the resolution and have a no-self moment of thinking who the hell is making that and who the hell is listening. I feel like the best resolutions are made in a desire-for-deliverance-like moment where you've just had enough, which I've also had in EQ. Today in fact I had a good long sit, and at one point near the end I had a thorough feeling of "fuck it", and with it a feeling of striving dropped away that I didn't know was there until it dropped. My immidiate awareness of it's absense brought it back within about a second, but now I know about it – the jig is up for that feeling of striving!
Dream Walker:
From nother thread -
http://www.dharmaoverground.org/discussion/-/message_boards/message/1978584#_19_message_1973107Daniel M. Ingram:
Or, one might be high up in Equanimity and yet not be able to land a Fruition. One might ask oneself, "What core process, subtle background or foreground sensations, or other patterns of experience are not yet brought into the clear light in the way I have done for so many objects?" In this way, one sees what one is missing and, having learned to see those objects naturally also, lands it.
I hope this is helpful,
Daniel
DW, you're like the archivist of the Dho, always trotting out the pertinent threads for someone.
Thank you, this is a good one, I had forgot about it. I did some of that investigating today and uncovered some such sensations. We can certainly get lulled into patters of feeling. The trickiest feelings for me (and I think others) are in the head which localize our sense of self. They are so tricky that it almost seems like a waste of time to untangle them at this point. What do you think?
Jen Pearly:
Yes, again. For me it was all the sensations that I normally think of as "me" that I wasn't seeing. And then, when I tried to, I grew weary of searching for a self. But as soon as I focused again on exterior objects--BAM, I had a sense of self! This was a key realization for me, and XX put it so well, subsequently--that subject and object create each other.
So good advice to remember--ask yourself what you aren't seeing clearly.
Best to you, Teague. So great to see how well your practice is going!
I actually had some success in rooting out some self sensations today. I used to try the direct inquiry method of asking "who am I" and I would get some Teaguey feelings in the chest and head and then I could vipassanate (yes, I just verbed that noun) those. But up in EQ, things are quieter and when I ask "who am I", I get crickets. They don't respond to being called to in EQ, it seems; you have to go in search of them. I wish I could remember the successful example I had from my sit today, but I can't.
Can you elaborate on what you mean by exterior objects? By that, do you mean opening your eyes (cause I know you do that)? Would you not get the sense of self from focusing on your foot, say, because it's part of "you"?
Thanks everyone,
T