End in Sight:
Supposing that you still have issues concerning the desire for sex or romance
Yes, though the issues have become less bothersome than before.
End in Sight:
* Do you hope to fall in love or find a romantic or sexual partner?
* Would you take the opportunity to do one of those things right now if it presented itself? Why / why not?
* (Assuming "no" to the previous question) Would you take the opportunity to do one of those things in the future, were circumstances different? If so, in what way would circumstances have to be different?
As a
feeling identity with
hopes and dreams - yes, yes and yes.
Why? Bliss.
Sometimes the answer is a more clear "no". And this is the most interesting aspect of my current practice. As I've already remarked in the other post, I arrange situations so as to tremendously
minimize the visual exposure of the females. This leads to
less triggers for the desire for bliss (and its concomitant neuroses). Further, this leads to leaving more time for thinking and doing
other activities (dislodging the bliss-neurosis), which leads to a generally more pleasant life. Under this mode of living, I experienced certain excellence experiences a couple of times (happened serendipitously): there was greater ease, pronounced lack of worry and anxiety, and a sense of just having fun, with feelings of motivation at imminent activities. And these experiences motivate me to keep doing whatever it is that I am doing. Contrary to the forewarnings of the wordly wise (that I am "missing it all out"), I know that I am in the right direction because I want majority of my days to be experienced like this.
End in Sight:
I wonder if you have considered making an absolute future commitment to actively preventing yourself from falling in love or searching out the experience of falling in love, making an absolute commitment to never having future romantic experiences and actively preventing yourself from having future romantic experiences, and never (as an identity) having a future sexual experience with another person, and actively preventing yourself (as an identity) from having a future sexual experience with another person.
Prior to embarking upon the above strategy, I told myself that this will be a temporary thing (so as to not freak out "me" who fears being alone forever) and that I'm experimenting to find out how far I can be carefree without desire for bliss actively thwarting it. If, in the end, I get to experience the aforementioned excellence experiences more often, all the better! If my life would be like that 100%, then I don't mind living without romantic and sexual partner. But since currently my life is not like that, deep within I tend to "welcome" any such opportunity, yet at the same time cringe at the thought of having to "be assertive" and "act phony" in order to persuade the identity inhabiting the female body so as to form a long-lasting emotional bond between "me" and "her" (which is what dating in the real-world is). Makes sense?
End in Sight:
On one hand, [actively preventing yourself from falling in love, etc.] may seem extreme. On the other hand, it seems that the problem is that 'you' believe that this is how things are already likely to be,
If by that you mean, 'I' believe that I will mostly likely not form a romantic bond with a female identity due to my lack of assertiveness, confidence and general dislike for acting phony, then yes.
End in Sight:
but 'you' cannot accept it,
If by that you mean, 'I' cannot accept the reality of not ever being able to form a bond with a female identity due to my lack of assertiveness, confidence and general dislike for acting phony and further freaking out on the conflicing "me" continuing to desire "bliss", then yes.
End in Sight:
and so 'you' are consequently battling against 'your' dislike for what 'you' imagine the future will be (the three-way fight between 'you', 'your' lack of acceptance, and the future 'you' imagine and cannot accept literally being 'you' vs. 'you' vs. 'you').
Hmm, the only conflict or battling I see is between "me" (the desirer of bliss) and "I" (the thinker of reality). And this conflict is reduced by the aforementioned strategy (remember the disloding of bliss-neurosis by other activities?).
End in Sight:
If your goal is AF, and you knew you were getting AF soon, you would expect that every single one of these things would come to pass, yes? And that would be profoundly good (nothing that 'you' would regret) as it means having reached the goal you set out for yourself, yes?
My ultimate goal may be AF, but right now I'm mostly aiming for VF. I don't know what you mean by "one of these things" - could you clarify? If I understand you correctly, you are saying that commiting myself to not bothering about not being able to fall in love ever again is "just fine" because when I reach a VF or AF, it would not be a big deal anyway. And I agree. Which is why I am aiming towards allowing more of those two excellent experiences I had.
End in Sight:
If it isn't a bad thing in principle that this state of affairs could come to pass,
It isn't a bad thing in principle only when experiencing those excellence experiencs. Other times, the "bliss" is so alluring as to make even longing for the bliss a worthy pursuit (I know that "longing" sucks no matter what) -- "I" would be so commited to worrying than being happy that it would take a while before getting back to feeling good (thankfully that duration is reducing).
End in Sight:
and if it already appears that things will never be otherwise anyway
No. "sex hope" (and "romance hope") still exists in me. I've had a few women stare at me, which only fuels the already existing desire for bliss. This is why it is even more important to maximize excellence experiences.
End in Sight:
, why not simply make it official, and resolve to do everything in 'your' power to keep it that way?
I hope to do that when majority of my days are spent in such excellence experiences.
Does what I wrote above answer your question? Please let me know if you have something more to share.