hi,
richard weeden:
I haven't experienced much in terms of arising passions
take care to discern clearly whatever arises ... if there is 'being' then there is passion; the texture of feelings will change from relatively gross to relatively subtle, and so what was once discerned as 'fear' (or desire, or aggression, or nurture) might not register as that anymore (perhaps because it doesn't feel like 'fear') ... but fear by any other name (or no name at all) is still fear.
richard weeden:
1)I am backing off - the retreat opened up a very big space - and I am closing down and resisting at some level - which is somewhat familiar from my vipassana days.
why are you closing down and resisting at some level?
richard weeden:
2) I have actually moved to a more subtle way of working and am struggling with finding the right way employing the method, or motivating myself.
motivations and feelings go hand in hand, and so the more one progresses, the less of both there is. pure intent is the key ... here's a paragraph particularly relevant to your situation:
richard:
It is the quality of pure intent is what pulls one forward with impunity ... pure intent transforms into action one’s determination to live a life full of gladness, peace and harmony with oneself, with a person of the other gender, and with all peoples. Pure intent produces total dedication – it is experienced as an irresistible enticement – and it makes it impossible not to do what is required (or to sweep an issue under the carpet and to let sleeping dogs lie) and to continue to conform to the long-failed dictates of the status-quo. Pure intent is not to be confused with being a ‘do-gooder’, or being full of ‘righteousness’, or being ‘moralistic’ or being ‘principled’. Pure intent is the quality that encompasses what morals and ethics aspire to but never reach. Pure intent is a manifest life-force; a genuinely occurring stream of benignity that originates in the perfect and vast stillness that is the essential character of the infinitude of the universe. Freed by pure intent from the very necessary social constraints – designed to control a wayward ego and a compliant soul – one can have generosity of character without striving. Pure intent guides one in each and every situation and circumstance – it is an essential prerequisite to ensure a guaranteed passage through the psychic maze – until the primacy of ‘me’ as a psychological or psychic entity withers away.
With pure intent one will not rest until one has gone all the way.
trent