I really have nothing to complain about. I am doing the Bahiya sutra practice I
outlined previously in the midst of my day for at least several hours a day, which is a huge gain and it feels like the karma encrusted around my life is starting to come away in massive chunks. However, it tires me out. Wednesday, I did the practice while eating breakfast and watching an internet video, and was so tired afterward. Not too surprising, since food and looking for cool stuff on the internet then arguing about it are my most pernicious addictions (skinny as a rake, but I have all kinds of digestive problems as a result.) So Thursday, I practiced just eating with the Bahiya meditation, and that worked well. (Eventually, I was running out of time, and decided to just let the addiction run so I could finish in a reasonable time. Oh, was it pleasurable.) But each day at work, I start to get dull around 4 p.m. or so and by 6 p.m. the practice is just a meaningless mantra, in that I know dukkha karma is running but I can no longer see the self constructed in reference to it, even though I was able to in the exact same situation earlier in the day. Then I come home, and fall straight into the internet animal realm, because I want to rest. (No porn, just browsing/arguing.

)
Is this a familiar problem for anyone else? Any suggestions for how to relate to it? I have tried cultivating mudita. It's helped a little.