Rick M:
5 January 2013
30 minutes, then a break, then 60 minutes. Better than yesterday, but mind kept racing. I'm starting to worry that I'm lacking basic concentration abilities after all this time, so I went back to just focusing on the breath, and bringing it back to that over and over again. Helped a bit, but was a struggle most of the time.
5 March 2013:
90 minutes this morning. Started by sensing the breath, and then my pulse. Rather quickly I started noting sensations all over my body, which became ~5 Hz vibrations as they got more rapid. Almost as soon as the vibrations started, my body started shaking with them. The shaking was much finer than yesterday, almost a quivering.
Twice during the session my mind was all over the place, so I stopped the shaking, went back to slow noting out loud, and let things develop again.
One time the shaking started again, the second time it did not. This was shortly after the 45 minute chime. I got distracted at this point by how to sit (back of the chair vs upright), how cold the room was, etc. Managed to get focused again, the vibrations started again at an even lower amplitude, and it was more of a dissolution-like feeling of being in a sea of things that I noted.
Take a look at the gradation pattern of your practice over this period of two months. What patterns do you see? How far have you traveled?
Are you seeing the same one's I'm pointing out?
First, let's address the sitting position issue. Don't think that you
have to be seated in any particular position.
Choose whatever position is most comfortable for meditation. And that means at any time, at any place. If that means sitting in a chair, then so be it. Don't fret over it. Just do it and get on with your session. If you find that you have to adjust your position during the sit, then do so and return to your meditation immediately without thinking about it. The lesson is:
don't let your sitting position become a hindrance to the development of concentration. Make whatever adjustments are necessary for comfort, and then return to the meditation.
For example: I usually start out sitting cross-legged on the edge of my couch. If I feel the legs losing circulation and it becomes mildly distracting (yes, only mildly for me at this point) I will adjust my legs by dropping my feet to the floor to allow circulation to resume. I don't think twice about it. I immediately return to the meditation and resume where I left off. Takes less than a couple of seconds to do. Bam! I'm back in a concentrated state examining phenomenon.
One thing to be aware of when following the Burmese instruction for "noting" is that by doing so, you have given up, to a certain extent, focusing on calming the mind and allowing the mind to sink deeper and deeper into that calm tranquil spot where concentration develops to its maximum potential. So, whenever you have to break away from that endeavor, you encourage the mind to become active by "noting" this and "noting" that. See?
Once the mind becomes active, it ceases to search after the calmness and the tranquility which helps to fuel the development of concentration. Concentration is developed through the practice of
samatha meditation techniques. Mental activity, on the other hand, stimulates examination and evaluation which is a necessary ingredient for insight to arise during insight contemplation.
If what you wish to accomplish first is a mind that follows your instructions whenever you issue them, work at developing concentration states. Once your mind begins to obey your instructions, then you are ready to pursue insight meditation techniques. "Noting" is an insight meditation technique.
Perhaps you might want to set noting aside for a bit to focus on becoming absorbed in the natural calm and tranquility of the mind. Once you begin to master this ability to enter the "silence of the calm," then you can return to the insight meditation techniques that will help stimulate discovery of insight into the Dhamma.
If you set your mind to accomplish an appreciation of calm and tranquility and keep bringing the mind back to that intention time and time again during your sit, eventually the mind will "get it" and obey your commands. When that day comes, you'll think: "Wow! I never knew this kind of control over my mind was possible!" But it is; if you focus on it.
Don't be surprised if, after you have been able to accomplish entering into a calm and concentrated state
at will, that the idea of "noting" suddenly becomes dull and boring. The activity of noting is only supposed to serve a brief part of your overall practice: which is to alert the mind to those moments when it loses concentration so that you can then switch to bringing the mind back to the meditation object. Used in this manner, noting is an insight practice which allows you to catch yourself from indulging in a wandering mind.
However, once you are able to enter into a concentrated state at will (through the development of concentration abilities), you will find more intriguing objects to focus upon than simple noting will afford. A concentrated mind (states of
appana samadhi or "fixed concentration") allows the mind to examine and evaluate objects more clearly, in an atmosphere of ease, in order to better see them for what they are. It is in such states (or momentary states) that fruition moments (realizations) occur.
So, think about whether or not you want to continue using insight meditation techniques while you are still trying to develop and master sufficient concentration states. Perhaps focusing on attaining to quiet and calm states (extended moments of calm, quietude, and unification of mind in pure unadulterated silence where the only focus is on BEING in that moment, and the last thing the mind has a tendency to want to do is to wander away from that tranquility), at this point in your journey, may profit you overall when you want to begin developing insight into the Dhamma.
Make sense?