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Practice Logs

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
8/23/14 9:08 AM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
Metta Practice 22Aug14

Metta Practice = a fun activity that brings me closer to being willing to experience anyone or anything.

NOTE:  I recently noticed that upon awakening from a deep sleep my weight on the scales is about 1.8 pounds lower than it is when I get on the scales a few hours later (no, I did not add more clothing or eat or drink anything).    I'm going to call this "psychic mass" -- it either is the conflicted mind or the output of a conflicted mind.   When I do 6-directions metta practice technique for the psychic mass I get heated up and feel the fiery friction of it and sit through it until it diminishes, then belly laughter turns on.  Keep going...

Recently read one of the member's posts commenting about deep sleep and my personal insight is that deep sleep is using the body to withdraw oneself from the playing field.   Reminds me of Jesus' "...turn the other cheek...".   No resistance, no time, energy, space, or mass -- no contention or friction.   Potential at rest?  A type of capacitor?  

My mind:
- yawns / belly laughs (rejection of held on significances)
- the heat turns on (remain passive and willing to experience it)
- feels quite therapeutic -- scenes and energies of conflict coming up for enlightenment, even the most subtle
- lost the concentration -- eat something

To be continued....

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
8/23/14 8:47 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
Metta Practice 23Aug14

The Mind (Continued)

NOTE:  When I say "mind", in this case I mean the reactive mind that holds all past incidents of trauma and conflict and stuck pleasure moments.   It is the mind that intrudes into the present and takes me out of the "Now".   It is the part of the mind that I identify with, and these exercises break the identification, i.e., where you can watch your chattery mind and know it is not you, and eventually this mind goes quiet -- vanished.

The other "mind" is the analytical mind that is not influenced by the reactive mind (problem-reaction-solution).  It has its own logical goal sets, namely "To Know and To Be Known", and its negatives.

With the reactive mind, conflict is not an option; however with the analytical mind, everything -- and nothing -- is an option.



- yawns, some laughter
- increased awareness of compulsive conflict
- quietness, dead silence

How does your mind seem to you now?
-  sigh of relief

Image another creating their mind and put that all around you.
- sense this is necessary for a game (it takes two...)
- all of us just boiled frogs
- there is a contagion -- or resonance -- factor among local minds
- I'm seeing life from  his fixed goal sets (I must not be known/they must not know)
- yawns
- the idea I do not need to go out of my way to exert force to change his mind; the "universe" will do it.
- it is not even his own mind -- he was overwhelmed by s'one and now he is creating their mind as his own

This is taking longer than I thought it would.
To be Continued....











End of session

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
8/26/14 8:10 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
Metta Practice 24Aug14

"Have another create their own mind" (Continued)
- yawns
- admiration for how this was all set up
- my selection and doingness in this

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
8/29/14 8:57 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
29Aug14

Metta practice for last few days corresponds with my sessions to reduce thirst for sensation gotten from eating and drinking. Quite an interesting project, and supervised by my partner.   It is raising my awareness about processed foods and game strategies, and "to poison" is a non-life goal within the goal set of "To Eat...".  I notice my palate changing tastes, for example I noticed the ripe banana had complex flavors and textures and I realized I never really tasted it like that before these sessions.  Gradually I am able to retain my analytical awareness when confronted with processed foods.

My metta practice has been centered around (and around me) what is important to me regards "to eat", mostly food items and people I associate with eating.

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
8/31/14 5:07 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
Metta Practice  31Aug14

I nurture my mind as if it were my child.   One re-hashes pleasure moments because they think they can no longer create to the extent they used to create; awareness of "now" is not yet sufficiently grasped, and therefore not sufficient.


My Mind  
All around me, 6-directions, In previous "mind" mettas I dealt with conflict.  In this session I'm dealing with stories and scenes of pleasure moments, aesthetics, etc.  Recall of beings trading minds and showing off their minds -- they were more detached about the mind, but it was still important -- for games play.... a bit like collecting Dvd's of shows and movies.  The urge to be in there experiencing, interacting and playing was more important than winning or losing.  

-  Increasing thirst for sensation -- along with decreasing awareness/ability -- demands for total identification with body, with the "story".
-  Stuck in pleasure moments of "dancing", choreographing -- perhaps a sub-goal of "To Create ..."

How does your mind seem to you now?  More understandable - and quieter.   To be continued.  

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/2/14 8:42 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
Metta Exercise 1Sep14

My Mind:
-  yawns, considerations of beauty and sensations of aesthetics, making the mind seem attractive and valuable
-  enjoyment of playing games with my mind
-  "I must" vs "I must not" (body somatics)
-  law of Duality a consequence of the goal set of this universe, and the urge to create effects
-  pride, ego
-  feeling of having an itch that can't be soothed which provokes self-destructive tendencies
    --  I see my dog scratching herself until she is raw -- it's like that, except I gave myself this "itch" 
-  painful awareness of ignorance of exactly what all happened to bring me to this condition ("Wake up, Mr. Green")
-  destroy self (and "not selfs") by making mad/insane
-  control issues, "must control"/"must be controlled"
-  insistence on holding onto the past -- keeping it important

How does my mind seem to me now?   It seems to say something about me as a being -- I created it.

Prep Notes (From Dennis H. Stephens):  
The very best advice I can give you at the outset is to be very positive
when you do the exercises; then be very passive and willing to learn
when bits of your past show up. In this way you’ll most rapidly
discover all there is to know about that most fascinating of beings -
you.
There is a short list of "Do’s and Don’ts" to guide you on
your way. You ignore them at your peril.

Don't attempt the exercises while your body is tired, hungry, suffering from disease or dietary deficiency, or while under the influence of drugs or medication (including alcohol)

The exercises are done with the body's eyes open at all times

Do the exercises alone, away from interruptions or distractions

Before, during, and after the exercises, the mind having given up energies, etc., consciously repelenish or else the mind will do the job for you which will cause discomfort and an increasing unwillingness to have sessions, and sessions will not bring the results.   (My Metta practice seems to serve this purpose)



RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/7/14 9:53 AM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
7Sep14


Metta, My Mind

The change up that I've been walking around marvelling about is the consistency with which I am aware that, in spite of apparencies, all is "self-to-self".   I feel a resentment towards someone?   I realize it is me against me, and I see an incident from the past before there were bodies or much matter.   I wanted to create a persistent dream so I had to create a split, thus the barrier as described above.  I rail against the barrier and then I gnaw on myself too and have carried these non-life inclinations all the way to present time.   Yes, there were also the life goals of To Know and To be Known on this playing field, but the consideration of force entered into it early on and I could only operate on a limited basis as long as the ancient self-destructive postulates went uresolved.

I see a wall or barrier somehow composed of the postulates "must not know/must not be known," and a lot of feelings, emotions, and thoughts associated with that.   I am on both sides of that wall, however I don't know that, and that is the purpose, and I did it.  

I have been moving that incident around, 6-directions to reveal more of what occurred there and thus to get my attention on it unfixed.   This has resulted in my everyday viewpoint that all interactions are unreal, in that my reactive mind (which got formed on the basis of that program set of must not know/must not be known) wants to make others the cause of any discomfort, and truly the discomfort is with myself -- self to sef -- and what I decided to do with myself and from the viewpoint of the being who can know only what is on one side of the wall or barrier.  

I gave up the viewpoint of the creator ("creator" became a "not me") and now I am slowly regaining that viewpoint too.  Instead of the snake biting its tail or the scorpion blindly stinging itself there is an increased measure of awareness of how this playing field was created and, more importantly, that it was I, in the first place, who did it.   

When I look at others I see "I" more and more than before.   I still get mind chatter and incidents and every phenomenon that attends that, but more and more I can stop and sit while I track it back to that primal incident.  The idea of "not self" is now for me only one side of the story.  

When you can take on the creator viewpoint the interactions on this playing field do become more amazing and wondrous because it is all you -- entertaining yourself -- from that viewpoint and you are able to be more detached, but as long as the "wall" is there, both viewpoints can be valid, and I dare not say more because I would be getting beyond myself at this stage.  

So the prime objective is to "take down the wall" (Pink Floyd), more accurately to be able to take it down or put it up -- unlimited ability.  As long as I am limiting myself from knowing that I am the one who created this universe -- oh, there is the other postulate that I can only know things that have been brought into existence to be known in this particular universe..... I did it to myself.   We are all cast from the same "creator", and we are all that same creator is what I am ticklishly aware of.

As Niz would say (Nisargadatta), "that's not IT!"    I agree, and I do need to get back to my metta work.  I have known myself to get stuck in a more pleasant state and not want to move on.

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/7/14 10:04 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
7Sep14

Metta:  A Beautiful Mind

Ah ha!  My mind finally got stirred up enough to drive me indoors and do my practice.   It was a case of A did not want to know B and B was ignoring A in favor of knowing C, and D did not want to know A, and D also did not want to know B, and now especially since A made such a ruckus about it.   D wanted to know the aesthetic E's and be complementary in the situation,   "When in Trumanville, be as the Trumanvill'ers."   Futility of waking the sleepwalkers in that time and place -- could lead to upset and games conditions.  

- huge yawns, incident coming up for viewing
- the first time this life I longed to have a beautiful mind
- someone else's beautiful mind I admired and coveted
- "can't have"
- a beautiful mind co-opted by the ego, pride
-  Eckhart Tolle has a beautiful mind
-  is an unperturbed mind
-  is less mind


How does a beautiful mind seem to you now?

More realistic expectations.  Letting go is important; however rehabilitating native abilities also important.
 

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/9/14 1:42 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
9Sep14

Metta Practice:  My Mind - all around me 6-directions repeatedly until no more change

NOTE:  I've become quite familiar with my mind, at least how it operates within the template of the possible goal sets of "To Know", interacting with others' same template.   What's beyond that I have yet to learn.  Still having fun taking this mind apart.

This a.m. did some mental judo:   My mind wanted to create all kinds of scenarios, dubbing in where there might be lack of real data to go on.  So I decided I can do consciously what my mind does robotically -- creating scenarios.

Also, I had an AHA! moment just deciding I was going to really look at my environment and feel it, touch it, and VOILA! "I'm here".  It was an Eckhart Tolle moment for sure   :-)   Laughter -- the joke's on me  :-)

New discovery:   A small bit of a yellow pill with the brand name of "lipodrene", a blend of stimulants including ephedra -- helps me exteriorize a bit from the psychic mass and metta sessions run better -- not such a grind.

My Mind:
-  keep seeing the pile of scrap wood partner wanted to bring home, still needing to be stashed somewhere.
-  mind wants to make judgements, i.e., it's good, it's bad
-  "No mind" very detached, no conception of a "problem"
-  mind eager to have a problem to solve, hungry for a problem
-  "No mind" amused by this swirl of psychic mass -- "my very own problem solver, gee thanks"
-  "A" must know the wood, "B" in self argument, "must know/must not know", and how can I push "A" into a must not know?
-  mind doing its job like a well oiled machine, but within its limitations of the postulate "must not know" the wood
-  I am reminded that freedom comes from being willing to experience anything
-  fear of rejection; aversion to revelation (being made to know something)
-  Aha! Mind is not capable of being complementary -- it must have a player in the game, an importance.
-  mind must compulsively create best use for this scrap wood -- gearing up to do just that
-  "No mind" amused -- "why must we?", with emphasis on "must".
-  oak flooring has value (reason why)
-  compulsion/fixation and postulate (must know) come before the "reason why"
-  I am amazed at how the mind can focus in on something to the degree it does, hence the term "narrow minded".  no 
   scale of importances at this moment.  For the mind nothing else exists at this moment except the oak flooring.
- so, in order to be complementary with partner I pose myself the question, "what is the best way to be complementary?"
-  answer is:  be him and find out
-  have no dog in this game and do what he wants and even contribute to his own reasons why for having it
-  feeling relief as I see the relation with the being is more important than relation with created things.  At a higher viewpoint it
   is all a solid and persistent illusion, but not so engaging at this higher viewpoint.
-  I also see my partner as a higher being and we are both looking at the game pieces on the playing field, amused in our
   own way.

How does my mind seem to me now?   It is mind and it does what it does and I feel less identified with it and I can use it or not use it; very grateful for the tools that allow me to lift off from the turmoil of the mind.   I am creating a scene of both of us unloading the wood as if we were one -- the one who created both of us.

Tears -- egoic mind crying a dirge.  Thank you to all the others who helped to make me realize the direction I was headed in and gave me a taste of contrasting bliss and serenity as a spur to keep up the good work.   So grateful -- this letting go.  May grace and mercy follow you.

namaste

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/12/14 9:11 AM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
11Sep14 Metta Practice, The Mind:

-  pride, ego
-  dominant postulate, "must be known"
-  mind seems all over the place now as opposed to being "narrow minded" in last sitting
-  many hippo yawns  :-)
-  very thankful that my mind is not me and that I see that more and more

How does my mind seem to me now?       Interesting as a subject for sitting, and why not?  -- I created it.   Life can be so simple without conflicting complexities of the mind.   Calm.


Have Another Create a Calm Mind:
-  yawns as some mis-emotion leaves
-  become the other person and "change my mind" as if I were that person
-  increased compassion and understanding for that person's travails -- what they are doing to themselves which they
   do not need to be doing
-  now receive an email from that person -- never receive any communication from that person -- just now


End of Sit

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/12/14 2:29 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
12Sep14  Metta Practice  My Mind:

This is starting to seem to be one of those "infinite" practices.
-  yawns, mind as scenes
-  surrounded by my very own home movie theatre  :-)   Awareness of many scenes, none in particular though
-  recall of a time when I desired a richly complex mind - sensation of aesthetics; thoughts of acquiring the minds of others
   to add to the collection
-  hippo yawns
-  increasing importance of scenes for their aesthetics; spiralling degradation
-  force enters into the picture; getting more serious
-  desire to split the mind into life-goals and non-life goals, and good sensations and bad sensations, and eject the latter;
   perplexed
-  It is all about urge to experience, striving, wanting sensation without the kickback, but the urge to experience takes 
   precedence.   
-  some struggle between relative importance of the scene in front of me ("real life") and the panoply of scenes at my
   disposal
-  fearful of exteriorization of viewpoint from current scene -- wanting to keep making current scene real and solid
-  my viewpoint is ensconsed into solid 3D (I continue consciously mocking up current scene and putting it 360-degrees)
-  I'm so "in" it that I cannot see that it is only my mind that keeps it here.  Is this really my mind???
-  looking out the window at the natural scenery -- I want these pretty vignettes - the "realness" (to see, to hear)
-  questioning the validity of this operation:  why am I "here", what is my best and highest here?
-  what awesomely great "havingness" -- this "reality" scene
-  stuckness, frozen (do 6-directions on current scene to get moving again)
-  fear of separation from body, some grief about it, body somatics- a tearing away  (at linkage points?)
-  exteriorization of viewpoint is not necessarily a "leaving" -- it's more like an expansion, an enhancement of viewpoint
-  starting to see the difference between the conscious doing of this and the unconscious automatic doing of this and feel
   I can exercise my ability to zoom in and zoom out (similar to the zoom feature on internet maps)
-  previously only been an intellectual concept and now becoming a subjective reality about how this scene is in my mind
-  oh, now I see all the past layers of similar scenes overlayed on this scene; keeps the zoom feature locked up -- can only
   zoom into the past and project futures based upon the past (linear zoom but no vertical zoom)
-  dominant postulate:  Must Know.  "I know, therefore I am (more)"
-  spheres within spheres within spheres -- concretization
-  fear of loss - gut somatics (awareness of morphic field of "the animals" including body animal)
-  life awareness
-  life enjoys both zooming in and zooming out -- no real preference overall
-  zooming out can mean "no experiencing" "no game", sort of like a watcher ("oooommmmm")
-  I feel oneness and separateness with life
-  sound is turned on (reminds me of a tuning fork)
-  stuckness, forehead pressure (do 6-directions)
-  fascination with the "stereo-ness" of 3D (to see, to feel, depth perception, interplay of lighting and colors)
-  it's not simply a remote scene on a curvilinear flat screen anymore, more holographic (significant change-up for me)
-  Note to self:  run the command, "Create a holograph" (if still important)
-  "To Create" can get very complicated  :-)
-  a "must know" person cannot let go of anything, including scenes from the past (where to put them all? -- why, just stack
   them)  

To be Continued

How does your mind seem to you now?   I like this gradient and depth of approach and my mind seems more manageable.

Have Someone Else Create their Mind (as scenes):
(to be continued)



  

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/13/14 12:13 AM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
exteriorization of viewpoint is not necessarily a "leaving" -- it's more like an expansion, an enhancement of viewpoint

Yep emoticon

You've fascinated me.  I'm commenting so that I will be notified when you post more on this thread.  I know where you are going.  If you were in Arkansas, I would ask you to meet and sit with me.

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/13/14 8:21 AM as a reply to Jeremy May.
Hello, Jeremy, kind regards.

Thank you for the example you set in doing your clearing work and encouraging others.

Your past life reminds me of when I interiorized into the precious and beautiful teardrop of a laughing Buddha and it seemed like eons were spent there going from extreme dark explorations of evil only to be lifted up into extremely ecstatic and brightened explorations with the help of angelic beings....to eventually exteriorize, able to laugh finally with -- and at my mind's creation of -- the Buddha.

"...I will teach him Not Buddha, not mind..."   --Tao Te Ching

When you sit, please contemplate my full return to "no mind", thank you.

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/13/14 10:04 AM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
13Sep14   Metta Practice, Continuation from yesterday's uncompleted work:

"Have another create their mind":
  • A "must be knowner" collects scenes to be able to throw them out and create effects for others to know; hates  [but in actuality invites] rejection (separation/oneness issues unresolved)  -- the game must go on...
  • A "must know" collects scenes (from others) and stores them and concretizes; hates deprivation
  • We all [as mind] jog back and forth between 'must know' and 'must be known', and their evil cousins, 'must not know', 'must not be known'.
  • I'm feeling the generic 'must be known'er' right now -- it's so beautiful, so "right", that I cannot see it for what it really is. Self-deluded.
  • Even in the most ideal conditions the compulsive mind will find its rejection to agonize over
  • Egoic mind has a meal of all the juicy rejections and losses of the past (inverted ego)
  • Jupiter/Zeus energies
  • Glowing outwards in pulsations, captivating-capturing
  • I am now feeling my own hatred/despise for this type
  • I don't want to know this type, and I don't want to know myself being this type
  • But there it is...too close to home  :-)
  • Not willing to experience what I have done to others -- flattery, mirrors, showmanship, light shows, etc -- but it's already happened
  • How did it start?  Who started it?  (continue having another create their own mind game)
  • "I must be known either as overwhelmer or overwhelmed"   ....  "I must be known"...he consciously repeats to himself to break the thrall
  • I feel the excitement of anticipation while he does this (I put his exercise around me 360 degrees)
  • Remind myself to stay passive and be willing to experience whatever comes from his mind while he does this
  • He is scanning out the degradation of his life -- not easy to look at
  • I myself feel sorrow and responsibility for this being's condition.  "I'm sorry, please forgive me."
  • I feel the death of my own egoic sense of separation:   "A 'bad man' is a 'good man's job...'" --  Tao Te Ching
  • I am pulsing back and forth between oneness and separateness -- awkward
  • He feels the shift and egoic mind is in sorrow, shame, embarrassment -- a little death of this "child o' mine"
  • He repeats the exercise and yawns  (me too)
  • I myself feel I must never again shirk from contemplating another's return to "no mind"
  • At last he is going all around me as a being with no compulsion, more balanced, restored; this "havingness" of a beautifully sane being is my reward

"How does your mind seem to you now?"   He laughs  :-))

Interactions more voluntary now -- more able and willing to sincerely know others -- with no hidden agenda

I feel thankful for those who have likewise contemplated my return to totally voluntary interactions -- or no interactions at all.

You are all welcome, and thank you !

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/14/14 4:49 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
14Sep14  Metta Practice:  The Mind:
  • clutter
  • simultaneous message of I must know/must not know my mind.  Repeat "I must not know my mind"
  • it is not nice to leave the game and twice as not nice to take someone with you
  • very important to make the distinction between what is "me" and what is my mind
  • without mind what am I?    I see this mind as a framework of postulates and their opposing postulates.
  • It seemed like a good idea at the time  :-))
  • much laughter  --  joke is on me

End of process.   How does your mind seem to you now?  Okay and I get the idea I can take it apart and voluntarily create a mind and uncreate anew.  Scour the flesh and get to the skeleton of it - disassemble.

Have another create something:  

(to be continued)

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/15/14 12:59 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
15Sep14  Metta Practice, The Mind:

In doing this practice and keeping the process adressing a very general subject, i.e., "the mind", I find that my mind will give me any and all sub-topics of stuck importance and I'm getting adept at handling it and getting back to the general topic. 

I've noticed that my neurotic fears about the environment (tigers and snakes and spiders and ghosts, et al) is no longer a distraction (payback for being the archetypal "the writer of scary stories" -- serves me right, lol, scaring little kiddies like that)

I thought I was going to need thousands of hours of sitting to resolve a certain mental problem, did some i'net research and started taking borage seed oil -- problem gone  !     Appears one must pay a certain amount of homage to the lower life forms while still engaged in the process of unsticking identification as a body  :-))   Having an alkaline chemistry seems to be a basic importance for this body system, thus the Saatvic diet.

1st Process command:   "Create a beautiful mind" -- put it all around you 360 degrees

  • "beautiful mind" seems like an oxymoron
  • a mind engaged with higher aesthetics
  • "To Create/To be Created" games 
  • even a beautiful mind can be a trap unless one can knowingly, voluntarily create it and uncreate it
  • aesthetics seems to have been the first sensation lure, and "To Create..." the first sub-goal-set of "To Know..."but if I were to create a mind and play a game I can't see anything better than aesthetics 

Note to Self:  what about a compassionate mind?
  • The creators are more important than the created/creation
  • respect for Life is more important than any game
  • I am not my creation -- I create s'thing in order to have something to know and to be known by - it's a fun game, but only a game -- I will never ever again forget that, once my current mind is de-fragged, then wiped off.  
  • I am the installer of my own preferred mind games -- or I can leave the "drive" blank for as long as I wish
  • I'm a systems programmer and I create an AI with a "beautiful mind" matrix; start-change-stop, and repeat with new variables

Note to self:  create a "complementary mind"  (turns the other cheek)

  • see mind as created "entity"
  • created mind includes identity:  I am this, I am that ...  and He is this.... He is that ....   let the game begin !
  • it is not so much a problem of having a mind, but thinking one is the mind, identifying with it, trying to 'not know' it - games conditions with one's own mind -- problem/reaction/solution over and over again in a descending. constricting spiral into seemingly irreversible degradation/destruction - sub-conscious noise as truth/commands - and finally abject insanity trying to appear sane -- or saner than the other insane brothers and sisters
  • when doing any subjective practice "not mind" is doing the exercise -- just that alone is helpful to pull oneself out of the mind chatter
  • a beautiful mind never has to use force or prevent another -- the consideration of force and prevention never has to be part of a game....bumper cars at a carnival, where everyone is having a great time -- walk away without any hard feelings or compulsions

End of exercise.   How does a beautiful mind seem to you now?  A construct/entity for a fun game. I should probably also look into this compulsion to 'must have a game'/'must not have a game'

Have another create a beautiful mind: Our dog, Blondie
  • I feel she already has a simple beautiful mind -- I find her beautiful as a being
  • but compulsively scratching herself
  • I thought this process would be to change her and I find it is changing me instead  :-)
  • she feels limited and frustrated -- as a dog -- re: creating a beautiful mind
  • in her dreams
  • aura, glowing, smiling
  • can make running a "dance" (figure 8's)
  • her beautiful mind potential is smaller due to having a dog form - re aesthetic espression/creation
  • is she capable of aesthetic sensations? Can she see colors?
  • she puts her growls on an aesthetic wavelength - croons
  • give her a bath and trim
  • beauty + scarcity = importance value, thus ...

"Have her create an importance"
  • a cute little one to take care of - a 4-legged playmate
  • a healthy body, shiny coat
  • running, jumping, exploring, smells, surprises
  • peace of mind - the infernal itch

End of Sit

Notes:    With this type of exercise -- having another create an importance -- I as a being am exercising my ability to pan-determine another being and I get insights into that being's mental condition.  But I can also project onto that being what would be important for me towards them.  For example, I could mock up Blondie wanting me to bathe her, if I thought it would be good for her.  A de-stressing exercise when applied to someone whose goals appear to
be opposing your goals, like a mother-in-law who wishes you'd never married her daughter.   Sometimes I begin to actually be 
that person in terms of their mental complexity, and then from there change my mind about something, create an importance.   Very powerful.

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/17/14 7:47 AM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
16Sep14  My Beloved Metta Practice:   My Mind:

Time out for some self-enquiry:
  1. If I am truthfully Allness and Nothingness potential then how do I best loosen from a viewpoint that tells me otherwise and has me thinking about suffering and sensation gratification?
  2. What is my mind apart from the brain?  What am I apart from my mental structure?
  3. How do I create a mind?
  4. How do I un-fix myself from my current compulsive and non-life mental structure?
  5. What is life and what does it do best?
  6. What postulates/demands did life make that created this 3D reality?
  7. By what exact formula did life descend into degradation and how can it use that formula to regain the condition of existence called "Nirvana"?
  8. When does wisdom become more important to me than compulsive egoic pursuits?  I.E., "Must know/must be known".
  9. How do I resolve the conflicts within and with my own mental reality, much less with others?

Big Note to Self:   When upset do not dive into 6-directions re "The Mind".   First, take the edge off the stress by placing around me images of "nice" things, or by walking around and looking at and touching things until the stress bleeds off.   THEN AND ONLY THEN dive into "The Mind".   Always end "The Mind" exercise by replacing any lost significances with significances of my own creation.   Lesson learned.   Yawn.

Observations of my current mental case:   There are two overwhelming incidents which I attach a great deal of significance to.  One is this lifetime and it can still be re-stimulated by interactions in the current environment.  Once that is re-stimulated it throws me back to an incident that occurred before there were bodies, involving self separating something out from self, and that is where the basic goal set of "To Know ..." is still very hot and active with a great deal of intense negative emotion, including apathy and catatonia, and non-life thoughts, and on the flip side some "godly" emotions/thoughts/sensations (love,  joy, ecstasy) that stick me into wanting to re-live past experiences -- stuck in past pleasure moments...delusional to the dual nature of this universe and what I really am. 

The trick is to let go of the importances I hold onto within these two incidents; importances are always determined by my postulates that contain a "must" or "must not", especially when they are butted up against each other and carry equal weight:  "I must create a new creation/I must not create a new creation".  "I must have a body/I must not have a body".  "I must know Joe/I must not know Joe".

My current important postulate re resolution of my mental case is "To square everything away with love ", which was Lester Levenson's goal when he was told he would die.   No more non-life inclinations towards myself or others.  The stuck incident this lifetime carried intense anger, hatred, self-destruction, degradation -- the whole gamut of negative, non-life mind-set and a beautiful near-death-out-of-body experience/sensation.  A double whammy.  Thus I do mostly Metta practice and have come to love this practice more than any other.

Rules of Current Metta Practice:
  • Choose a general topic of address -- in this case the entity I call "my mind".
  • Check self and make sure I'm entering the sitting with a positive attitude, not upset; if upset, do positive process.
  • While doing core practice bleed off emotions/sensations/feelings just enough to locate and run the underlying postulate(s); remain passively open to whatever the mind presents.
  • Locate and "run" the underlying postulate(s) using a repeating technique, i.e., "I must not know Joe ... I must not know Joe .... " until no more change -- no more phenomenon -- occurs.
  • Check if it is okay to end the core exercise by asking self:  "How does your mind seem to you now?"
  • Always run a positive process before, during, and after running a process that is likely to bring up and release stuff, and especially when I feel like I'm getting in over my head.
  • Always run the core practice for another too - the viewpoint of another being  - as if it were my own (I'm still working this out).   Follow the rules of doing the positive process also.  
  • Failure to follow through with ample positive process can send me crashing and then not wanting to do the core Metta practice for days.

Other Necessary Practices Towards Vanishing the Mind:
Bring up past events of the day at the end of the day until no more "energy"  or stuck attention on anything that occurred that day and they can be filed into the past where they belong and I am sitting in serenity re day's events.

Continue working with partner on clearing own mind of compulsions re "To Eat..." and "To Taste..." to better work with others on these issues.

Live life watchfully and wisely and let it prove you.  :-)

End of Notes.


Start of Metta Practice:
Create/image something/someone I like and put it all around me
- smiling eyes; gives me deep satisfaction

Have s'one else create/image and put it all around me
-  s'one sitting

"Take your mind and put it above you"
  • yawns, fleeting thoughts, scenes, etc.
  • "To reason"  1175-1225; Middle English resoun, reisun (noun) < Old French reisun, reson < Latin ration- (stem of ratio).
  • "I must reason" -- it is a bit of a lie in order to keep an interaction ongoing because in truth there is no reason except, "it seems like a good idea at the time"
  • "I must not reason" --  I hate it when people can't be reasoned with, can't see the rationale, the logic -- they want what they want when they want it and they can't see the long term consequences.  People cannot reason very well through pain and suffering and they will take drugs with a page full of contraindications as a palliative instead of resolving the root cause.   Without reason people create solutions that create more problems, that add to the complexity and degradation of life.  
  • I see how I twist myself into a knot; therefore to love, to have compassion, to allow one to create their own experience, to allow one to know or to not know is the higher ground.
  • I agree to allow one to create an experience of being dictated to by his compulsions, his thirst for sensation -- I have no need to get into a games condition with that person
  • With myself, I find I generally enjoy being reasoned with, but not its negative, i.e., feeling "mindfucked".
  • A "must know" personality would reason differently than a "must not be known" personality
  • The aim of my Metta activity is to remove the "must-ness" and "must not -ness" so that interactions become more fun, or easy to let go of.
  • "All your viewpoints are mine"   :-))
How does The Mind seem to you now?   Less fixated on need to employ reason which led to frustration and negative mind-set.

Positive Imaging for self
Positive Imaging for another

Another's Mind 6-D:
yawns
he asks, "what am I?"

Positive Process

End of Sit

 

RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/17/14 11:00 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
17Sep14  Metta Practice:  The Mind

"Whenever you have to attend to your daily affairs, or undertake any matter, always spend some time in meditation and everything will be all right".   ZuXi, neo-Confucian scholar in Song Dynasty
  • First, getting mind quiet and discharging energies from yesterday's events; bringing up scenes from yesterday - yawns
  • viewpoint starts to exteriorize -- how does yesterday seem to you now?  -  more scenes, laughter, objects in environment more delineated, brighter, no mental overlay from yesterday -- how does yesterday seem to you now?  -  what yesterday?  :-)  LOL
  • some realization about "I don't have to feel/do that anymore".  Can walk through yesterday with more ease.

My Mind 6-Directions:
scenes and other "stuff and nonsense"  :-)
"To Administer"/"To Organize"/"To Clean"/"To Own"/"To Dispose of"/
"I must own/I must not own"  (repeated)









RE: Practice Log toward vanishing the mind
Answer
9/18/14 8:49 PM as a reply to Colleen Karalee Peltomaa.
No more non-life inclinations towards myself or others.  


Hi, Colleen,

Good to read you. I think I get what you're writing here and in its context (up thread). I also wanted to say, to me, it's natural to have "non-life inclinations". It is very natural to want stress and source of stress to end and it is very natural to realize being alive requires constant re-fueling of actual food and water, constant re-fueling of one's safety or efforts towards being in safety, constant re-fueling of social dignity, then re-fueling of sensual gratifications (Mmm... peanut M&Ms). To be alive entails exhausting maintenance and being alive often results in being non-alive with unpredictable timing. So a mental perseveration on non-living is also a natural question of "How do I end these stresses inherent in being living?"

One can answer that impatiently via violent/harmful actions and patiently with something like artistic/curious/helpful action. The last scene of the movie "District 9" comes to mind: human-alien making a metal flower : )

So I guess I just felt a caution when I read that sentence (excerpted): it is likely, to me, that the volition of "no more non-life inclinations..." can go beyond a proper healing work into a resistance/aversion/avoidance to seeing things as they are: That living beings can also feel the exhaustion of being alive and the foreseeable, constant hustle of being alive and naturally living beings can become overwhelmed at the prospect of propelling oneself forward, especially if one's future looks stressful (harmed, unsafe, undignified, in pain..). To see this exhaustion, it's a good thing to see, a real, permanent source of compassion for all living beings at work to be alive whilst there's no promise of life (of safe, pleasant living).

What you are writing about, to me, is the heart of the two truths: "Wisdom" and "compassion". Wisdom sees the conditions of life and compassion is what allows one to transform information (even information that we don't like, such as urges to be non-living or causes of non-living) into wisdom by just sitting with that experience with kindness for self and other living beings feeling the same roller coaster of being alive and being on the edge of discomfort, indignity and certain death despite all efforts.

So a gentle artistic/curious/non-intrusive intention can develop in this, and certainly kindness and compassion.

Maybe I've really gone tangential to some of your thoughts in this thread : ) Anyway, thanks for sharing your practice.