Hello,

I got some energy stuck in my head and face by meditating too hard during a 10 day retreat. I didn't know that you were not supposed to imagine an upward flow :-(. It moves around and feels like an invisible octopus attacking me with its tentacles. I have been struggling with it for 4 months and it has created depression and anxiety and I lost my job. I have gotten most relief from accepting the situation as it is and focusing some attention whenever I remember on the heart or belly areas of my body. I seem to be learning very slowly how to relax and settle into myself or "ground". Any advice or practices to help deepen or quicken this process would be great. I get scared when I read online warnings about rising energy and having it stuck in the head producing insanity and early death.

Thank you.

Okay, squats have done wonders for me in this area. Squats especially when you go down, you're holding the weight on your shoulders and upper and lower back, then as you go up you're using your leg muscles and glutes, lower back, abs, lats, upper back, and shoulders. The force travels up and down your body.  Especially when I'm going up, I feel a lot of energy moving toward my lower energy center under my belly button. It really works better than anything else I've tried for this problem. Combine that with steak and masturbation and will hopefully see some positive results. It is not hard to make the energy start moving down. If you prime it, give it a push, it will move on its own. Physical exercise is not a shortcut or a copout, it is a way to immediately involve yourself with the energy in your body.

Edit: and of course you can be mindful of the sensations during the exercise at the exclusion of other thoughts and sensations and gain insight while you're getting ripped! ;)

Hope this helps.

Nice! Thank you! I have been thinking I need to do squats lately anyway.

Regarding masturbation...I experience a lot of guilt after masturbation. I never used to, but I have this whole idea that whatever I was doing before was bad and led to my breakdown and so I have tried to turn a new leaf and get rid of my old patterns and addictions. Masturbation was one of those things. Especially to pornography. In general I always got a sort of sick, naughty, evil feeling when watching porn so I definitely think I will continue to abstain from that. I have masturbated a few times recently but then later on if I have low energy or tension I find myself blaming the masturbation, which is kinda dumb I guess. At the same time, I do think there is some sort of dopamine anxiety feedback loop which can become problematic in certain brains with tendency towards addiction and OCD. Anxiety->compulsion loop that ends up in binging and freaking out. Really trying to solidify myself, stabilize myself.

Steak sounds great but I have noticed I have hemmoroids I guess I need to eat more fiber. It is difficult not to resent being "trapped" inside this body and mind which seems to be so ultra-sensitive and can't handle the pleasures of life without falling apart!!

if you want to stop accumulating energy in your head, you are going to need to masturbate.

you don't have to watch porn. it is a natural human process, no guilt required.

i used to find it helpful to focus my awareness on my navel throughout the day, even during meditation.

Seriously? Is it not considered sexual misconduct and against Sila?

If it is a known and approved practice for balancing energy then that may be just the excuse I need!!

Diet, exercise, and orgasm might play a role for some, but I've never noticed this to be the case. What I have found most helpful is simply time. Time provided the space I needed to grow accustomed to the sensations and eventually to realize, Hey: whatever is going on, it's totally harmless. It was this latter shift in attitude, I think, that proved most beneficial.

Related to this, spare yourself the horror stories. It's just people projecting their fear-based paradigms onto experience, and those ideas are about as toxic as they are infectious. If you cop to what you actually know, odds are it won't amount to much more than a) I have a head, and b) there are some funny sensations there.

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night with nightmares again. Happens multiple times per night every night. Then I noticed the energy was moving down into the body and I was having visions of past traumas. I decided to go sit on the cushion and let it happen. Energy was unraveling. It seemed to be twisting out of my left upper chest area. Not sure what is there as the heart is in the center no? Images of past mistakes, rejections, embarassments, scary situations started flooding my mind. I remembered a time when I was away at marine biology camp in second grade where some drunk counselor came into our dorm room and started screaming and bangning a broomstick on the floor and threatening to kill us. I guess we were up late giggling or something. Then he grabbed me out of the bed and made me clean his bathroom, then he sat out on some stairs with me and apologised (while drinking a beer) and begged me not to tell anyone. I never told anyone. Then I remembered missing the spelling on a word in the spelling bee, a girl I liked rejecting me, being taken out of a private school I loved and put into a public school where I got beat up a lot. I remembered later on when I forgot what love was and started lying to women to have sex with them. Saying "I love you" when I didn't mean it. I felt energy unraveling from my throat as I remembered how much lying I did. My whole body is sore today but it seems I can breathe a bit more easily. Still, I feel tension returning. It isn't like this is the first time I have remembered all of that stuff. I thought I was past it already. What is happening to me? Why does this happen and how can I get all the way through it? How can I let go of all the past trauma for good? Do I have to remember it all and re-live it again? Is there something I have to do or just keep meditating and being mindful and aware of the whole body and get my emotions flowing smoothly and functioning properly again and it will all resolve on its own? I am 40 years old. 

It's helpful (insofar as you can manage it) to not engage with this stuff as it surfaces. Try to adopt the witness stance and simply observe as the garbage flows past. Investing past traumas and stresses with attention and reactivity as they arise won't make these patterns dissipate any faster or with less pain (quite the opposite, actually). Try to remember that the dredging up of this stuff is also its release. 

So, hang in there. Grant yourself the time and space needed for unfamiliar territory to unfold and become more manageable, as it surely will.

In the moment it comes up it always seems to come up as a story pointing to some insight that I need to have or something. Some deeper realization where I will go "Oh!" and then all the tension will disappear. So, I get caught up a little bit in craving for this insight. I will sort of search for it or dig deeper. Maybe there is a repressed memory in there I need to identify or something. And when I catch myself doing this I lovingly will just step back and say something like "That may not be true, you don't have to remember or figure anything out. Best not even to pay too much attention to these images. Return to the breath. Return to your true self the observer or witness." When I do this the images become blurry and the movements of energy seems to become more generalized over the entire body rather than in a specific place such as between my eyes or in a particular organ or chakra.

There is an experience that happened the other day where I felt like I was being drawn out of the body and into that pure witness space. Sounds around me started to go down in volume, sensations reduced in intensity, it was like I was disconnecting from every sense, even thoughts and emotions. But then fear caught me and pulled me back in. I only felt myself drift off or fall into this emptiness for about a second. And now I am trying as hard as I can not to make achieving that state again a goal. I noticed though that it was fear that pulled me back into the body. Like fear of falling or drowning. I can feel that fear now as a constriction and irritation throughout my chest and throat. It gives me something to breathe into and make my meditation object and allow to be there and allow to dissolve.

As the saying goes ‘what goes down, must come up’. You don’t have to relive all that stuff but the tension and tightness that gets locked in to our bodies during our life must get released and so kind of like eating some bad food - what comes up has something of the same flavor (sorry for the bad pun) but is more the distilled essence of that stuff. When it is fully released it will be gone and you will feel much better without it.

As for the energy in the head thing. I think the back channel (Du) is open and the front (Ren) is blocked. You need to open up the front channel. Look into microcosmic orbit and Du and Ren meridians - in particular, look into the main points along the ren meridian and try a practice of breathing energy in and out of these points - spend time with each one until you feel some warmth or tingling there and then move to the next - do this with a relaxed mind and body - smile, don’t frown.

Try this: focus on the point between your eyebrows - hold your hand over that area but not touching such that your palm is facing your forehead. Then slowly sweep your palm down from your forehead down to the abdomen. As you are doing this imagine that you are drawing or sweeping the energy down and keep your focus of awareness on the skin surface following your palm as it moves down. Do this slowly and in a relaxed and calm way. Keep doing it for at least 5 or 10 minutes. Repeat as needed.

If you want to practice the microcosmic orbit - without opening the front first - you will probably keep getting pressure built-up in the head area so try working with the points along the front first.

http://www.mudrashram.com/kundaliniemergencies.html

good luck, you will get through it.  also read the dark night reccomendations in mctb

Seems like this dark night is pretty much the same in all people... Kundalini is awakened, which means that you become ultra sensitive to tension in the body. Past traumas which were stored in the body as tension release and this release process can be scary but once it is over you feel liberated and your emotional system functions much more smoothly and you become more of a real human being than the robot you were trying to be before.

It seems to me this should be standard psychiatry / psychology and they should be able to identify those who store emotions as tension, trigger the release process and provide an ideal environment for it to all be released as quickly and completely as possible. Why does this not exist in our society? With spiritual awakening and meditation becoming more mainstream this is going to be a huge issue in society soon.

I'd like too know what kind of meditation you did and what kind if retreat you went to. Goenka? 

If you are going to start doing squats and maybe deadlifts (I love deadlifts ) then it is extremely important that you learn good form, in order not to hurt your lower back and knees. The most important things are to keep an arch in the lower back during the entire movement and to push your knees outwards. If you're doing squats, then go down as far as possible while still keeping the arch in the back, or to when the hips are about knee height.
Some good programmes could be Starting Strenght  or maybe the Russian Squat Routine (works for deadlifts as well).

Maybe these form tips apply to meditation posture aswell, what do you guys think?

So, right now my sense of self is generally what is looking out my eyes. It is a complete stillness and silence and emptiness that is somehow aware and intelligent. There is some thought in the mind about a person, some judgement, but nowhere near as much as before. I feel my true self as what is looking out my eyes, and what can feel the sensations of the body. It seems located in the center of the head. When I meditate, This sense of where "I" am expands into the space around the body, and sometimes I can sort of feel myself as space itself, everywhere. Very rarely in meditation, I feel all my senses start to drop away, but then I catch myself... like choking or falling... and I am involuntarily pulled back into the senses.

If I am the space, then certainly I am the octopus, because the octopus is created at the border between space and mind/body. It is space trying to enter through the head and being blocked, probably by the false self.

But if it is me then why do I have no control over it? When I meditate into it and feel myself as it should I strain for control over it? I would guess the answer is no.

I appreciate your advice and I am happy. I used to think the sensations were chi or prana. Many great teachers do. However, I have often wondered whether it is something else... Something beyond energy.

I do have conviction. There is fear but I am not afraid of fear anymore. Come fear, pain and be felt. I am done with resisting and running. 

I second Pal's recommendation of the importance of good form and checking out "Starting Strength" by Mark Rippetoe. 

Some progress after reading Pawel's comments...

I spent most of the day realizing I could in fact feel my true self... the one looking through my eyes... and in fact can feel myself in the space all around my body. Basically, if I can sense it, I must be touching it, so I am everywhere because I can sense everywhere. Just by holding on to this perspective of surrounding and permeating the body, rather than being stuck inside the body in the middle of the head, has completely changed the character of the sensations and made them much more gentle. I am the energy trying to flow into the body and there are some eddy currents around the head and face. I am not even sure it is prana or chi anymore. I look forward to exploring this new perspective.

Bodhi,

Well, every time this stuff comes up, let's call them samskaras, mental and physical formations, meet them with out judgement or reaction as best you can, like a scientist would observe phenomenon in the laboratory.  Just observe, that is all you have to do, but observe without getting involved.  How?  Well, why get involved? All that stuff that happened before, it done , gone, irrevocably lost to the past, unrecoverable, it only exists in your mind, as a formation.  These formations, or samskaras, exist only because they are ignored, i.e. in the unconscious and not thought about, so they stay alive, or they exist because every time they arise the mind "feeds" into them, gives them energy.  You have to starve them out, cut off their nourishment.  How? How, again does one cut off the nourishment of these samskaras?  By observing with equanimity, like the scientist in the lab, the more you react by dwelling on the memory or react by emotion the more you feed the samskara.  You have to starve them out, these samskaras are all trash, junk, garbage, useless, let it go by equanimity.  

But, you want to learn insight from these past experiences, you want to examine each and every instance.  No, it is all trash, past history , gone, it can not come get you, it is now no more than an ephemeral formation in the mind and body.  There is no need to examine trash, just throw it away.

But, the insight of the samskaras, is this, do not repeat the actions that caused the samskaras in the first place, this is done through Right Livelihood, Right Speech, and Right Action.  

So first step on the path, Morality,  quit creating unwholesome samkaras.  Then, and at the same time, starve out the old bothersome samskaras, and each time you meet them with equanimity they will grow a little weaker, when they arise again, meet them with equanimty, they grow a little weaker.  Wash, rinse, repeat.

Alot of us have gone through the same types of things you have, some have had easier path, some a harder path, but the process is the same, you are not alone.

It works, it takes time, it takes effort, you won't be succesful at every opportunity, but keep getting back up and meeting these samskaras with equanimity, just observe without judgement or criticism, as best you can.

Fall down seven times, get up eight.

And Balance, don't over do it, don't underdo it, find something fun to do on the side...

And Time, nothing really changes quickly, it takes time, and daily effort...

And Hello Bodhi!

Goodbye Bodhi!

Hope this makes sense, now or some day, or maybe you have already heard this , eh?

Psi Out

Anddon't forgett to do light warm up sets!

As a quick addition to Chuck's comments. In general, move the center of identity downward... Another approach is to meditate on the body center, below the navel. Inhale with the intention that the energy concentrates into the abdomen, exhale with the intention that the energy diffuses out of every pore of your body. It's a gentle, releasing, calming meditation. Like sighing, ahhh...

Just want to throw in a quick suggestion: recently I was dealing with something similar, a persistent blockage in the head, such that when I would sit the pain would occupy most of my attention, even though I didn't feel particularly upset with it. What was annoying was that I simply could not focus on my object (or non-object) of meditaiton with this throbbing "thing" continuously presenting itself. Eventually the idea of doing a meditation on dependent arising came to me, and it seemed like that was the switch that threw everything back in order. I seem to remember this happening before, too, maybe not with a blockage in the head, but some other type of blockage, emotional, intellectual (like doubt), etc. I don't know if you have a practice for parsing out dependent arising, but mine goes along the lines of just seeing how everything that occurs in the mind is dependent on conditions, i.e., for every output (like a thought or judgment, which I might tend to identify with in my normal consciousness) there is a corresponding input (sensation). The whole world is in a constant exchange; every part of "you" comes from "it", and there's no real boundary that can be drawn. Once you see this enough times, a deep understanding may arise. Another way of getting at it is to see how things are always "bubbling up", or, as Chris Marti described in his practice log, that the mind has the quality of a lava-lamp: you can watch something happen at the level of initial contact (sensation) kind of travel upward to the level of expression (thoughts, judgments, redirections of attention, etc.), but without identifying with that process itself. Also, though I haven't picked it up myself, I've heard that Rob Burbea's book, "Seeing That Frees: Meditations on Emptiness and Dependent Arising", is an excellent resource for different techniques, and judging from the title, I'd wager there are some practices in there that deal with dependent arising.

I hope this is of help to you,
Kyle

hi i post below text for a group of doctors but they didnt answer me.plz read it if ur sympton is like me reply or email me.i found some way for it as i wrote in text but its too bad and i dont know i can cure it or not.so plz read it carefully and tell me ur sympton is exactly like me or not


hi
befor i start i should say sry because its long but my issue is realy serious.just if u r proffesional dr plz read it if not plz dont waste ur time

i born in 1993.and im male live in iran and i had epilepsy when i was 7 year and now i havent epilepsy and dr after many test cut my pill(carbomaspin) and now i havent any problem in my body.liver,heart,..all r okey and i test them. and again i apeall if u r professional doctor help me.because i talked with many consulter and psychologist and they couldnt diagnose my issue and i have it for 5 years.
and another thing i want to say befor start im pretty sure its not delusion.i dont use any drug and alcohol.i had mri and no tumor

i was 17 and i sense very weird sense in my head and nose area and up of my nose i mean center of my forehead and sense is so bad and annoying.imagin is fire allways under ur skin head and bother u.its hot and it make lots of presure like hitthing me from inside.lots of presure .it make me red and my nose go bigger it effect in all part of my life.change my character.never stop and all the time is with me all the time even when im sleep.so i cant go out or i cant do anything no relationship no trip and....realy i feel it.all the time for 5 years plz belive me its not delusion.its exactly like mass of energy that trapped in my head.

but hear is important 3 years ago i had very hard concentration and meditation level and with concentrating i tryed so lots of that energies go out from center of my head in up side, when they exit i feel them like how i feel my hand it was so clear.that was best sense ,that never i experience that before.that was so good.but lots of them still remain in my head and i focused and tryed hard but i couldnt put them out again.and now realy im so tired.
it was just a brief of thetnsense and im pretty sure that anyone think im mad but plz if u r professional and know about it help me to diagnose it till im alive
something else perhaps help.
it make me so angry and i want to escape from anyone and anything.energy put me under lots of presure and i cant escape from it beacause its in my head.reading is hard for me.and consentrating so hard.i hadnt any meditation and consentration befor it.and when this issue start i find meditation.
and i dont know how it exactly start just i remember weird sense start in me.
i didnt say to anyone about myself but my family know that im so weird because all the time im in my room and consentrating to experience that again.
and i should add when part of that energy go out presure is so lesser than past.and exit of energy from center of my head was same u have bootle of water and make hole and lots of water go out from that hole.lots of that energy went out from center of my head.hot place instigate it.i dont remember anything else
thanks alot

I had some trouble with enery stuck inside the head for 3 years, I can't tell if it was as bad as your situation --certainly not--, but I had serious headache, strong diziness (to the point I was sometimes about to faint) and a constant feeling of stupor with this energy being so strong it would take all my attention.

After trying a lot of things, what helped me was :

• concentration : at first concentration got me energy in the head, so I was avoiding any type of concentration by fear it would worsen my situation. But I found that actually going deeper and through the energy "knots" was actually helping me to dilute and assimilate it
• noting or at least noticing : noticing the enery moving, pulsing, etc. time frame by time frame, helped me to get rid of the sense of a continuous phenomenon. This new perspective allowed me to drop it once and for good
• also taking some time every day to direct the energy through the front channel (along the spine but on the front side of your body), feeling the energy going down and diffusing in the body.

So now I still have energy in the head, and it sometimes still bothers me when I'm tired, but I can manage it and it's not a bother anymore.
Whatever strategy you might adopt, be patient and give it a few weeks or months before it works.

I wish you the best.

"a persistent blockage in the head, such that when I would sit the pain would occupy most of my attention, even though I didn't feel particularly upset with it. What was annoying was that I simply could not focus on my object (or non-object) of meditaiton with this throbbing "thing" continuously presenting itself."

Has this throbbing thing left you now? Are you now able to sit and relax without automaticly attending to it?

Love,
Jonas