After a few weeks not writing down my practice, and as my first log is becoming a bit too heavy to read (even for me), I open this new practice log (*roars from the crowd*).

My practice, on cushion:

• shamatha at least 30 min per day, doing anapanasati (ANP) ; sometimes longer, and sometimes twice.
• vipassana / bare awareness, 10 to 20 min after shamatha

My favs off cushion:

• keeping awareness of the breath at the forefront (KABF): as much as possible
• lion's gaze (LG): diffusing awareness in space, delocating the sense of "I" being "here"
• self-inquiry (SI): investigating for components of the sense of "I"
• noting and bare awareness

2016-04-20

On cushion:

• noon : 20 min APS, lots of dozing. Last days' loss of sleep are clearly not helping.
• evening : 10 min APS + 10 min bare awareness / noticing. Lots of dozing again, I need more sleep. When noticing, there is a sweet spot of presence not being affected by phenomenon. As strong as they may be, I just have to step back to that sweet spot and watch the show. It seems to unknot a lot, like rising into higher and higher planes of equanimity, but it does not seem to come to an end. Maybre something to get rid of as well.

Off cushion:

• LG: as much as I can, definitely a favorite practice. Learning to function as much as possible from panoramic attention, using focus attention to consider objects more closely. Into that mode, things are much more felt than seen. Some fear though, so I'm diving deep into that practice as much as I can, to gain confidence. Eg: knowing when the traffic light turns green without having to look at it.
• KABF: still not consistant at all. I manage to know the breath for a few minutes when I think about it, then it's lost for most of the day.
• SI: mostly used when dealing with negatively-perceived phenomenon. I turn my attention towards the feeling of I and actively investigate its components. A quite frustrating practice as it is very elusive, probably a lesson to be learnt here. The good point is I'm more and more reckognizing a "savor" of me, coming with a strong and moving sense of intimacy.