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Girls and Friends always on Mind: Morality hindering Concentration

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In the last few months, a flurry of strangely-halted friendships and new crushes have just popped up in my life. Not a usual for me. I find my concentration practice, previously on a great track, now has almost no efficiency, the monkey mind takes over no matter what.
I usually keep to myself and don't have a lot of drama in my life, so this isn't normal for me.
Has anyone had this problem and perhaps a skillful way of dealing with it?

Jack:
In the last few months, a flurry of strangely-halted friendships and new crushes have just popped up in my life. Not a usual for me. I find my concentration practice, previously on a great track, now has almost no efficiency, the monkey mind takes over no matter what.
I usually keep to myself and don't have a lot of drama in my life, so this isn't normal for me.
Has anyone had this problem and perhaps a skillful way of dealing with it?


Hi Jack, what helps in my case is to do some noting, like just note thoughts.

When meditating I "stand back" oberving everything, and everytime a thought arises i note "THOUGHT".

Works great to apease monkey mind.

RE: Girls and Friends always on Mind: Morality hindering Concentration
Answer
3/14/19 3:14 PM as a reply to alguidar.
Thank Alguidar. I do note "thought" in my practice. 
I suppose I was more curious if there was any skillful decisions on adapting morality/sila for said situations.
That said, I'll make a point to note even more frequently. Thanks again.

Hey Jack,

Yesterday I was working with a more senior and experienced coworker on a project. I watched myself become extra self-aware of my own work and started to become a little bit hard on myself when things weren't moving as smoothly as I hoped while having irrational thoughts that my coworker might be annoyed with my abilities. I looked for the source of the suffering for wisdom. I observed that it was my own pride and expectation of myself to perform at the level of my coworker that was the source of suffering. I was doing the best I could with the abilities and experience I had but my ego had built up a false reality for me to live up to.

Similarly, in your barrage of thoughts, see if you can find the source of suffering. Often our minds will try to cover up a deeper issue by projecting stories and fantasies about how we think things should or shouldn't be. As you said...
"I usually keep to myself and don't have a lot of drama in my life, so this isn't normal for me." 

This is an expectation, a fantasy, an ideal you have for yourself that is ego projected. You are very likely to have much worse drama at some point in your life. Remember that we aren't trying to solve our problems so that we can have a practice that is "on a great track"; We are working to understand why our problems make us suffer. The more you make 24/7 Right Effort to investigate (Right View) and watch mindfully (Right Mindfulness) your thoughts and emotions, the more wisdom you will find (and the better your concentration practice will become). Instead of trying to resolve difficult thoughts and emotions, simply learn from them. Just watch. Turn your daily life into your meditation.   

Best to you and your practice!       

I have a mind that wanders a lot. Also, I am often sleep deprived. I used to think that meditation when I struggle to concentrate was waste of time. But everytime I would see benefits later. I believe it is a good equanimity exercise. To accept your state, your thoughts and resist temptation to crave for this 'better efficiency'. Efforts pay off, just do the best you can.

RE: Girls and Friends always on Mind: Morality hindering Concentration
Answer
3/17/19 10:34 AM as a reply to Nick O.
Thanks Nick O. That makes sense, on my own closer analysis of causes, see that my ego has also built a false reality to live up to.
And then what? Did that realization alone help you with practice, or at least help deal with people?
For me, the false reality still seems to exist, even though I can better rationalize it now....

RE: Girls and Friends always on Mind: Morality hindering Concentration
Answer
3/17/19 10:37 AM as a reply to pieva.
Leva. Ok, yes! This is awesome to hear. I've definitely been lessening my meditation timer because I've felt it's of no use when my mind's out of control. But it makes sense that this of all times is a perfect chance to practice.

Nickol Lindsay: good advice as well. I shall do this.