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Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:16 AM
Thanks in advance to anyone taking the time to answer this. I’ll try to keep it short.

I was noting 5 sensations per second, got passed the A&P (huge sexual energy, erection, etc.) then it was if everything got far away. I felt as though I was expanding. Then body felt a little harsh, but in waves. I’ve had this feeling before, in a bad dream. I noted things like “harsh” and “unpleasant”, slower than 5 per second. Then I got incredibly calm and got even more expansive and couldn’t tell if my hands were sitting regularly on my body or twisted in some weird shape. Felt like both. I could note but didn’t really want to, just wanted to sit and be. I did note the peaceful feeling, this time I was noting about 2-3 per second. After a few moments of this it kinda felt like the session was over. Everything started to go back to “normal”, even with me noting. Now that it’s been a few minutes since I stopped, I still feel an incredible calming sensation.

My question is, was that last part equanimity? Or because I lost focus to noting I went back down?

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:24 AM as a reply to Travis McKinstry.
Did you get the feeling of having the hands backward? Haha, I get that too! No, that’s not equanimity, but it’s one of my landmarks indicating that I’m going in the right direction. Might be an aspect of third vipassana jhana. I see it as a glimpse of realizing kinesthetically that the division between subject and object is an illusion. You are the first one I have heard of who shares that quirk with me.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:26 AM as a reply to Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö.
Thats so interesting! It definitely felt like my hands were all twisted up. The last time I passed the A&P with such deep clarity I felt like I was hanging upside-down or something.

Sot that calmness I felt at the end, what was that about? Perhaps me just easing more into the meditation?

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:27 AM as a reply to Travis McKinstry.
Exactly, it feels like both. Like being both the one that touches and the one that is touched at the same time. Inside and outside. Both sides of the mirror. The kinesthetic version of looking back at oneself.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:28 AM as a reply to Travis McKinstry.
Travis McKinstry:
Thats so interesting! It definitely felt like my hands were all twisted up. The last time I passed the A&P with such deep clarity I felt like I was hanging upside-down or something.

Sot that calmness I felt at the end, what was that about? Perhaps me just easing more into the meditation?



That’s a jhanic factor, I believe. I get that too.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:30 AM as a reply to Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö.
The kinesthetic version of looking back at oneself
Woah that’s bizarre... that’s a very interesting way to put that. Thanks for that clarification.

So I can be relatively certain that was Dissolution at least?

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:32 AM as a reply to Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö.
I actually perceived myself as hanging upside down once! I was so surprised that I just wanted to get back on the mat. So I imagined sitting inside a circle and sliding down the inside pf the circle until I was firmly on the floor again.

At one time the backward hands came together with the perception of sitting in front of myself, mirroring myself.

Later in my practice I started having similar experiences with all the other senses, all in third vipassana jhana. Cool stuff, but hard to describe without sounding outright crazy.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:40 AM as a reply to Travis McKinstry.
Travis McKinstry:
The kinesthetic version of looking back at oneself
Woah that’s bizarre... that’s a very interesting way to put that. Thanks for that clarification.

So I can be relatively certain that was Dissolution at least?



I’m definitely no expert on mapping others, but yes, I would assume that it is past A&P. For me this was so typical for the dukkha nanas. That’s a favorite aspect of them. I really like that feeling. And for me it’s a stage I go through in the sittings later on as well, and the feeling tends to stay with me although it doesn’t stand out like that. In third vipassana jhana the periphery stands out very clearly, so if you are focusing on the breath, it is rather typical to have that sensation in the hands standing out much clearer than the breath.

Are you mainly kinesthetic too? Is the sense of touch more important or more fundamental to you than vision and hearing?

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:44 AM as a reply to Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö.
I very much appreciate your feedback. I’m sure no one considers themselves an expert in diagnosing paths (except for maybe Daniel). I’d like to see what others have to say. Thanks again Linda emoticon I hope your practice is going well!

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:46 AM as a reply to Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö.
Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö:
Travis McKinstry:
Thats so interesting! It definitely felt like my hands were all twisted up. The last time I passed the A&P with such deep clarity I felt like I was hanging upside-down or something.

Sot that calmness I felt at the end, what was that about? Perhaps me just easing more into the meditation?



That’s a jhanic factor, I believe. I get that too.



Third (shamatha) jhana is where the feeling of equanimity starts to appear, and third vipassana jhana has some features in common with third jhana. So one way to put it is that it was the feeling of equanimity as a quality, but not the equanimity nana.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:48 AM as a reply to Travis McKinstry.
Oh, you are very welcome. I was thrilled to see someone else sharing the same landmark as me.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 10:55 AM as a reply to Travis McKinstry.
I’d recommend that you use this experience to investigate no self. Embrace it fully and take it in.

RE: Was that equanimity?
Answer
7/9/19 11:04 AM as a reply to Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö.
Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö:
I’d recommend that you use this experience to investigate no self. Embrace it fully and take it in.
I will definitely investigate it. Thanks again