Something's (slightly) wrong here. - Discussion
| Something's (slightly) wrong here. | Eran G | 4/14/11 7:42 PM |
RE: Something's (slightly) wrong here.
|
tarin greco | 4/14/11 11:39 PM |
Again the sense of something slightly wrong with experience arises.
Feeling as if a certain part of experience has been blocked off. The mind is reaching out to it but there's nothing there. Some of the usual sensations still arise and attention is called to them (e.g. Attention goes to the back of the head) but there's no feeling of ownership, just another sensation.
I want to be able to describe this experience as non-dual. At least for the simplicity of it, for having a name, for closing the door on 'what is this?'. That may be another part of the problem, trying to make the experience into something or anything doesn't feel right anymore.
Can I say that 'there is just this'? Can I say that I am one with experience? Often experience does not feel at all different and it is very easy to just fall into old habits and continue life as it always was (at least in some ways). There seems to be a difference in the feeling of having a point of view, in that there's nothing there and there's nothing special about this point from which the view appears.
A sense of deep dissatisfaction despite the fact that this is better than it has ever been. Or maybe the other way around. I think this is the driving force behind this questioning. Still the same pattern of aversion although with less avoidance. Something hasn't quite been resolved yet and it is esthetically displeasing to the me (what is this me? Don't know).
Is this pointing at some deeper level of self that has not been uprooted? Where is this coming from? Compared to this, looking at the One Who Knows was easy
Feeling as if a certain part of experience has been blocked off. The mind is reaching out to it but there's nothing there. Some of the usual sensations still arise and attention is called to them (e.g. Attention goes to the back of the head) but there's no feeling of ownership, just another sensation.
I want to be able to describe this experience as non-dual. At least for the simplicity of it, for having a name, for closing the door on 'what is this?'. That may be another part of the problem, trying to make the experience into something or anything doesn't feel right anymore.
Can I say that 'there is just this'? Can I say that I am one with experience? Often experience does not feel at all different and it is very easy to just fall into old habits and continue life as it always was (at least in some ways). There seems to be a difference in the feeling of having a point of view, in that there's nothing there and there's nothing special about this point from which the view appears.
A sense of deep dissatisfaction despite the fact that this is better than it has ever been. Or maybe the other way around. I think this is the driving force behind this questioning. Still the same pattern of aversion although with less avoidance. Something hasn't quite been resolved yet and it is esthetically displeasing to the me (what is this me? Don't know).
Is this pointing at some deeper level of self that has not been uprooted? Where is this coming from? Compared to this, looking at the One Who Knows was easy
