I've been having some challenging experiences of late -- primarily off cushion -- and they seem like they might be meditation related. They are concering enough that I've been making my dukkha ñana speed-dial calls to the necessary trained specialists (meditation coach, therapist), but I'd appreciate thoughts from the community on this too.

The first experience was about a month back when I was microdosing psychedelic mushrooms. I don't do this often, but I've done it enough that I felt pretty confident in how I would react. It usually gives me a subtle pleasant feeling, but this time I started to have feelings of panic which were made worse by being at home with my family and not wanting to freak out in front of them. I was able to stay in a room by myself, but I started having intense unpleasant feelings throughout my body. As I was lying in bed trying to relax through the experience, my body started to convulse. This continued for about 30 minutes until the unpleasant feelings subsided.

Last night, after an exhausting day, I woke up from a nap and began to experience the panic again. Again, it was made worse by knowing my family was in the house. This time the feelings were much clearer. There was an unpleasant vibration all throughout my body that reminded me of Kenneth Folk's description of dukkha ñana type sensations as dissonant jazz. Everything felt awful, and the thought of making any mental choice felt unbearable. I didn't want to see or talk to anyone or direct any energy to acting or doing. There was a strong sense wanting to get out, wanting it to end and feeling hopelessly trapped. I had intense sensations in my brow area and my face began to smirk and convulse. This led to my whole body convulsing. There was a moment towards the end where it started to feel okay. I was doing metta and thinking about it as a form of spiritual purification and the panic subsided, even as the sensations continued for awhile.

Panic attacks are not a common occurrence for me. The last time I experienced anything close to what could be called a panic attack was over 15 years ago. It feels like something related to meditation as it seems to fit descriptions I've read of dukkha ñana experiences. I've had a low grade feeling of aversion and fear since then (and in retrospect I can see that I had similar feelings immediately before). 

I appreciate any thoughts from the community on how to approach this. I am practicing about an hour a day currently doing a mahayana style vipassana. I'm also starting a new job next week which could certainly be adding an additional layer of stress.