Any help wold be highly appreciated

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Levi Paradox, modified 3 Years ago at 1/18/21 9:51 AM
Created 3 Years ago at 1/18/21 9:51 AM

Any help wold be highly appreciated

Posts: 2 Join Date: 1/18/21 Recent Posts
Hi everyone,

Very easy to misunderstood things in meditation world I guess so please forget me my ignorance and the following questions.

I'm a bit stuggle with my practice, so I would describe very briefly what I do experience, please send help what's next.

Usually when I do meditate daily I sit nearly 60min. My very best was 120min.

I experienced every time I do sit down to meditate each session going to be easier than the previous one. 
Sometimes I have the feeling I went that distance shorter time than on my previous sit. So I do archive equnimity state under 5 - 10 min duration. Previously took me 30 40min but still wasn't that deep than now under 5 min sometimes even when I close my eyes after  5 -10 breath I'm in total equinimity. I mean under equnimity pulse comes down the breath nearly 6 - 9 under a minute. 

I never did struggle with concentration i guess because I done all my life sport and play guitar. 

So what I'm experiencing right now? My muscles absolutely in ease mind is very one pointed breath 6 - 9 / min.
On visual field many nonsesnse images poping in an out I don't really pay to attention to them. 
Sometimes i have a feeling oh hold on where am i? but I'm fully aware of everything body sensations, mental pictures, sound.
so I would carefuly say a bit of out of body feeling. Not sure I use the right term.
I did try noting technique from Mahasi but it's feel boring to me and won't let my meditation deepening, so if i just let everything go and experience must say track but without the head on my voice "body sensation" "mental pictures" whatever, but I am aware of everything what's going on. 

Sometimes I have a little pause on audotory field. I use headphones with Theta waves. But sometimes for a half secound like everything gone it usually happens on end of a long exhaling feels like there is a gap between the exhale and inhale while everything just stops. Its happening 1 to 3 times under a sitting usually. 

In everydays life. Since i do meditate, anger is gone from my life that was the most significant what i spoted. I was before very self defensive and arguing people unless i proove my right. But by now even if I'm getting any critique just don't give a shit about can't get me angry. Excuse my language. Last day happen some incident in my house somebody shouted right to my face and I just watch her very stil tracking my hearth rate and breath my hearth rate went up was so heavy, but in mental side I was very very very sharp with much clarity what answer should I give. I did answer fully calmed. 

I still feel a lot of bad moments when I overthink situations mostly my on my job place I'm getting very much down. I feel people suck out the life out of me. I cannot enjoy that atmospehere it feels a bit like i feel their vibe straight to my spine. 

That's all about it please help me what to do next, I do really enjoy sittings, won't fight with pain, but after an hour usually my eyes just opens because sometimes I feel "yeah it's cool but I'm bored" 

Please only do answer if you experienced these or further.

Thank you.
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J W, modified 3 Years ago at 1/18/21 1:18 PM
Created 3 Years ago at 1/18/21 1:18 PM

RE: Any help wold be highly appreciated

Posts: 675 Join Date: 2/11/20 Recent Posts
Levi Paradox:
Hi everyone,

Very easy to misunderstood things in meditation world I guess so please forget me my ignorance and the following questions.

I'm a bit stuggle with my practice, so I would describe very briefly what I do experience, please send help what's next.

Usually when I do meditate daily I sit nearly 60min. My very best was 120min.

I experienced every time I do sit down to meditate each session going to be easier than the previous one. 
Sometimes I have the feeling I went that distance shorter time than on my previous sit. So I do archive equnimity state under 5 - 10 min duration. Previously took me 30 40min but still wasn't that deep than now under 5 min sometimes even when I close my eyes after  5 -10 breath I'm in total equinimity. I mean under equnimity pulse comes down the breath nearly 6 - 9 under a minute. 

I never did struggle with concentration i guess because I done all my life sport and play guitar. 

So what I'm experiencing right now? My muscles absolutely in ease mind is very one pointed breath 6 - 9 / min.
On visual field many nonsesnse images poping in an out I don't really pay to attention to them. 
Sometimes i have a feeling oh hold on where am i? but I'm fully aware of everything body sensations, mental pictures, sound.
so I would carefuly say a bit of out of body feeling. Not sure I use the right term.
I did try noting technique from Mahasi but it's feel boring to me and won't let my meditation deepening, so if i just let everything go and experience must say track but without the head on my voice "body sensation" "mental pictures" whatever, but I am aware of everything what's going on. 

Sometimes I have a little pause on audotory field. I use headphones with Theta waves. But sometimes for a half secound like everything gone it usually happens on end of a long exhaling feels like there is a gap between the exhale and inhale while everything just stops. Its happening 1 to 3 times under a sitting usually. 

In everydays life. Since i do meditate, anger is gone from my life that was the most significant what i spoted. I was before very self defensive and arguing people unless i proove my right. But by now even if I'm getting any critique just don't give a shit about can't get me angry. Excuse my language. Last day happen some incident in my house somebody shouted right to my face and I just watch her very stil tracking my hearth rate and breath my hearth rate went up was so heavy, but in mental side I was very very very sharp with much clarity what answer should I give. I did answer fully calmed. 

I still feel a lot of bad moments when I overthink situations mostly my on my job place I'm getting very much down. I feel people suck out the life out of me. I cannot enjoy that atmospehere it feels a bit like i feel their vibe straight to my spine. 

That's all about it please help me what to do next, I do really enjoy sittings, won't fight with pain, but after an hour usually my eyes just opens because sometimes I feel "yeah it's cool but I'm bored" 

Please only do answer if you experienced these or further.

Thank you.

Keep going!
emoticon

Seriously though, if you're struggling with boredom, well, you mention you play sports and guitar. Have you tried working these hobbies into your practice as concentration practice?  I've found these both can have a synergistic effect.
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Levi Paradox, modified 3 Years ago at 1/18/21 3:22 PM
Created 3 Years ago at 1/18/21 3:22 PM

RE: Any help wold be highly appreciated

Posts: 2 Join Date: 1/18/21 Recent Posts
J W:
Levi Paradox:
Hi everyone,

Very easy to misunderstood things in meditation world I guess so please forget me my ignorance and the following questions.

I'm a bit stuggle with my practice, so I would describe very briefly what I do experience, please send help what's next.

Usually when I do meditate daily I sit nearly 60min. My very best was 120min.

I experienced every time I do sit down to meditate each session going to be easier than the previous one. 
Sometimes I have the feeling I went that distance shorter time than on my previous sit. So I do archive equnimity state under 5 - 10 min duration. Previously took me 30 40min but still wasn't that deep than now under 5 min sometimes even when I close my eyes after  5 -10 breath I'm in total equinimity. I mean under equnimity pulse comes down the breath nearly 6 - 9 under a minute. 

I never did struggle with concentration i guess because I done all my life sport and play guitar. 

So what I'm experiencing right now? My muscles absolutely in ease mind is very one pointed breath 6 - 9 / min.
On visual field many nonsesnse images poping in an out I don't really pay to attention to them. 
Sometimes i have a feeling oh hold on where am i? but I'm fully aware of everything body sensations, mental pictures, sound.
so I would carefuly say a bit of out of body feeling. Not sure I use the right term.
I did try noting technique from Mahasi but it's feel boring to me and won't let my meditation deepening, so if i just let everything go and experience must say track but without the head on my voice "body sensation" "mental pictures" whatever, but I am aware of everything what's going on. 

Sometimes I have a little pause on audotory field. I use headphones with Theta waves. But sometimes for a half secound like everything gone it usually happens on end of a long exhaling feels like there is a gap between the exhale and inhale while everything just stops. Its happening 1 to 3 times under a sitting usually. 

In everydays life. Since i do meditate, anger is gone from my life that was the most significant what i spoted. I was before very self defensive and arguing people unless i proove my right. But by now even if I'm getting any critique just don't give a shit about can't get me angry. Excuse my language. Last day happen some incident in my house somebody shouted right to my face and I just watch her very stil tracking my hearth rate and breath my hearth rate went up was so heavy, but in mental side I was very very very sharp with much clarity what answer should I give. I did answer fully calmed. 

I still feel a lot of bad moments when I overthink situations mostly my on my job place I'm getting very much down. I feel people suck out the life out of me. I cannot enjoy that atmospehere it feels a bit like i feel their vibe straight to my spine. 

That's all about it please help me what to do next, I do really enjoy sittings, won't fight with pain, but after an hour usually my eyes just opens because sometimes I feel "yeah it's cool but I'm bored" 

Please only do answer if you experienced these or further.

Thank you.

Keep going!
emoticon

Seriously though, if you're struggling with boredom, well, you mention you play sports and guitar. Have you tried working these hobbies into your practice as concentration practice?  I've found these both can have a synergistic effect.

Hey,

Yes! I always was completly disoluted on this hobbies so sort to say never was over excited when it happen in meditation. 

It was like" yeah nice, but that's it?" some people talk about like something mirracle for me this is a basic. So that's why hard to get this things in my understanding. 

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