Hello, I need some advice

Mathew Poskus, modified 8 Months ago.

Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 212 Join Date: 10/24/15 Recent Posts
Hello, I have anger issues, I was abused alot mentaly psichically, in the morning the anger I feel whole body is just  burning, I feel locked inside,anger is stucked inside, maybe somebody has advice, I feel really fucked up  
Sam Gentile, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 1345 Join Date: 5/4/20 Recent Posts
Mathew Poskus
Hello, I have anger issues, I was abused alot mentaly psichically, in the morning the anger I feel whole body is just  burning, I feel locked inside,anger is stucked inside, maybe somebody has advice, I feel really fucked up  

Hello, with the level  of anger issues, I would sugest perhaps seeing a pschologist or counsolor first
shargrol, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 1620 Join Date: 2/8/16 Recent Posts
The first step is taking responsibility for yourself. What research have you done on anger? Any approaches seem promising to you?

When in doubt, google it out.
Mathew Poskus, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 212 Join Date: 10/24/15 Recent Posts
Just forgive and breath deeply emoticon not really works, I mean maybe somebody has some expierence that could relate (narcissistic abuse) to be more pricecly
George S, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 2062 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
It sounds like it wasn't safe for you to feel the anger when you were being abused, so it got locked inside. What could help is really allowing the anger to be felt in the body without judgement or acting on it, so it can be released into awareness. It's a really tough long process though, so you need to be in a safe place and preferably to have the support of a trusted friend or family member or professional. It's hard to forgive until after the anger has been fully experienced and honored. Somebody did something wrong to you and you had every right to be angry about it, but you couldn't, and now your body is telling you it's time to feel the anger. It might feel like you are being re-traumatized by the anger, but assuming you are not currently being abused then experiencing the anger like this is healthy (even if it doesn't actually feel like that right now).
Mathew Poskus, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 212 Join Date: 10/24/15 Recent Posts
Thnx
Mathew Poskus, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 212 Join Date: 10/24/15 Recent Posts
I feel now dread in my belly 
Emil Jensen, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 305 Join Date: 7/16/20 Recent Posts
Hey man, sorry that you are stuggling so much with this. I'm not trying to give advice here, as that is not my place. But thought I might share a small story of how I healed something in myself using the help from therapists. Perhaps this will inspire you...

I won't go into too many details, but basically I painfully learned as a kid that I wasn't good enough for others whenever I was being myself. So I had to put up an act in order to feel welcome. An act that I kept for the next 20 years or so. Man, this caused so much pain in my life as I felt I couldn't belong anywhere. Oh, and also I thought that something was wrong with others because they were so damn stupid to seemingly prefer this fake version of me. Like, who'd prefer that?!

Aaaanyway! Pain was there.

In a few therapy sessions over a couple of days I discovered this problem, recognized it and actually came to let go a lot!

In the process I had to revisit the scenario where it all started. I had to really go back there and feel the full blown impact of those associated emotions. Not only was this super scary in and of itself, but I also had to go there with the bravery and strength to accept them and meet these emotions with infinite love and compassion.

This allowed me to bring compassion to the memory, the trauma - and this allowed space required for the healing to finally take place.

The letting go was like ripping off an old rotten bandaid.
Consisted of convulsions varying in strength over a whole day. On the therapy table they got strong. Tears were running down my face, my breath was shallow and sharp, my body shaked vigurously. But all the while I was feeling compassion towards this little kid who stood there in the kindergarten, feeling like utter shit for being who he was. Man, all he needed in that moment was a hug and to be told that he was awesome just the way he was.

As I imagine I myself go and give this kid a hug right now, tears coming to my eyes again. I guess this wound has not healed 100% yet, although it's sooo much better than before emoticon


Perhaps healing from trauma could be about acceptance and strength to revisit our memories with the bravery to provide the love we needed in those moments but didn't get. 

This can be tough as hell, especially if the trauma is stronger. Therefore I just wanted to give you this story, in case you need to hear an example of how it can be done.

I don't know what you've been through, but I firmly believe that you deserve nothing but love as well. May you heal well from your experiences emoticon
Mathew Poskus, modified 8 Months ago.

RE: Hello, I need some advice

Posts: 212 Join Date: 10/24/15 Recent Posts
Thank you  , great ur healed, compassion for emotions is great idea!

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