ego death and waking up out of the dream

shalomdukvpsiyaniyna yiklaknauikpo, modified 14 Days ago.

ego death and waking up out of the dream

Posts: 12 Join Date: 4/28/21 Recent Posts
i wish to share an experience i had a few years ago.

I was regularly lying in a bed outside, thinking about holographic reality, and the self. If i can see a roof, my direct current experience of reality fully includes the roof, so "I" must be this roof, at this very moment. Going on with this logic, I tried with success to fusion with auditive landscape. Everyday sounds were becoming part of "me", or was it me becoming them? When you fuse, there is no more "you" and the other object, only one.

Still, my experiences were shorts and limited to earing and somewhat to sight.at some point I found a passage in the shobogenzo stating something like "you must do nothing. if you try to do nothing, you are doing something: trying".
​​​​​​​Indeed, trying is an ego-centered action, that locks you in your self.
Great point.

So i get out of bed and go walk on the beach, and I start to mentally "do" nothing, not even trying.

then "my" ego, illusion of a self, disappears. all buddhist texts start making sense. importance about things are all equal: grains of sands, water, "other" persons around "me"... not the slightest difference of importance (equanimity).
It feels like waking up, and realizing that the avatar in your dream wasnt really you: all pain experienced in the past gets retroactively eradicated (it has never been _your_ pain).

this experience lasted a few seconds, maybe 5.

although during that time, "I" was selfless, the sight I was able to see was restricted to what the eyes on what was my body could reach. Due to this it still subsist a possibility that it was only a trick of my brain. To fully validate that the self is fake, I'd have to astral project to a place ive never seen, and then check in the physical world if it is actually the same thing.

a few years later i still can't reach this experience simply by meditating, tho I haven't really "tried".
​​​​​​​
what is your opinion on "my" experience?
George S, modified 14 Days ago.

RE: ego death and waking up out of the dream

Posts: 1629 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
Thanks for sharing. It sounds like an impressive nondual experience :-)

although during that time, "I" was selfless, the sight I was able to see was restricted to what the eyes on what was my body could reach.Due to this it still subsist a possibility that it was only a trick of my brain. To fully validate that the self is fake, I'd have to astral project to a place ive never seen, and then check in the physical world if it is actually the same thing

In a very real sense, all experience is a "trick of the brain" ... that's all we can ever experience! But it sounds like you still have some doubt, like you think there might be something else you need to experience that your eyes can't reach. This might be why you are looking for an opinion (or a confirmation?) I don't know ... what do you think?

Another common trap is to think that the self is a complete fake. It's not that it doesn't exist at all - it's just that it's not the stable identity we commonly mistake it for.
shalomdukvpsiyaniyna yiklaknauikpo, modified 14 Days ago.

RE: ego death and waking up out of the dream

Posts: 12 Join Date: 4/28/21 Recent Posts
I don't think consciousness emanates from the brain. I think brains emanate from consciousness. I don't see any other logical way to explain verified extra corporal sight experienced by astral projectors. Although there are many report of these occurrences, including by near death experiences, I haven't verified it by myself, which makes it not 100% proved, at my personal level.

after my ego death experience, I can't see the self as anything but an illusion. just as if you'd be watching a movie and get attached to a character, so much that you'd be absorbed to the point of thinking it is yourself.

​​​​​​​thanks for your input emoticon
Derek2, modified 14 Days ago.

RE: ego death and waking up out of the dream

Posts: 187 Join Date: 9/21/16 Recent Posts
what is your opinion on "my" experience?

You reconnected with the prepersonal layers of consciousness. These layers are there all the time. It's just that most people don't notice them due to the noisy activity in the more developed parts of the mind.

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