Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 5/25/21 12:54 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 5/25/21 12:54 AM

Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 5/25/21 12:58 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 5/25/21 12:58 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
I started meditating three years ago, my first AP was a couple of days after starting doing fire kasina practice, i had a vivid lucid dream of a rotten old lady looking me directly thru the mirror, i stared at her burning eyes, then i had a energetic rush thru all my body. The next years were followed by a very bad dark night, I quit practicing for 6 months more or less, so a bad practice ( o no practice at all) did make things worse. Right now i am in re-obervation i thing, judging by the weird earworms and very complex second screen patterns.
One Love, modified 2 Years ago at 5/26/21 7:17 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 5/26/21 7:17 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 3 Join Date: 5/23/21 Recent Posts
Good work Jake...just keep observing 3 characteristics  of these "special" experiences as of they were any other experiences. 

Doing anything else with them would just prolong The Suffering.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 5/28/21 2:23 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 5/28/21 2:23 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Thanks for your input bro.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 5/28/21 2:26 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 5/28/21 2:26 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Today i did 4 hours of fire kasina. Lots of energy-kundalini, lot of aversion to the experience at the beginning of the session, that eventually faded away, getting more and more details in the murk, which is a good thing. Planning to up the dose, right now i am finals in my college so im only doing around 3-4 hours a day, but i will be doing 6-8 hours a day once im free. Im really tired of the dark night and i want to get out of this as soon as possible.
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Kaloyan Stefanov, modified 2 Years ago at 5/28/21 7:17 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 5/28/21 7:16 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 83 Join Date: 2/18/21 Recent Posts
Hi Jake, I hope you don't mind me popping in here. You mentioned you are tired of the DN and cannot wait to get out. Keep praticing and keep attending to the 3Cs,as above, that is always sound advice.

One small thing to add maybe would be to soften up a bit on trying to get out of the DN, as in my experience that attitude tends to make DNs more painful. It seems DNs are here to teach us many valuable lessons, one of the key ones being to open up to any kind of sensations, even if they are pretty rough and shitty...the more we stuggle to get out, the bigger the clawmarks emoticon

An attitude of openness to fear, disgust, pain, irritation, anger, dullness, whatever else comes up is something good to cultivate, as, if you are progressing well, you will be having a lot more DNs, and some of these might end up being a bit more rough than others.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 6/3/21 5:10 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 6/3/21 5:10 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
I understand, thank you for your advice.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 6/3/21 5:15 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 6/3/21 5:14 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Did 5 hours of fire kasina today.
Spend most of the time in the black and gray, altho it keeps getting wider and deeper, good thing i guess.
I also had glimpses of this white fluid material which Daniel calls "The Molten Gold".
My mood is way better since i up the doses, benefits of concentration.

Finally, i finished my semester in law school, so from today i will start with my "hardcore" practice of 6-8 hours a day for at least 2 months, i don´t reject the idea of going even harder, but for now, this is all i can do.

May i attain stream entry for the benefit of all sentient beings.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 9/14/21 5:14 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 9/14/21 5:14 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
I think i already got up to equanimity but fell again, right now im doing 4 hour of noting plus 1 hour of fire kasina. 
Planning to go to a 10 day goenka retreat in october, i will be doing only mahasi noting. The reason for this is because i have faith in the technique, and i think that i have a fair chance to land stream entry there.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 10/16/21 9:38 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 10/16/21 9:38 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Practice have been kinda weak lately, maybe 2-3 hours... But today i resolve to attain stream entry before this year ends, so gonna start practicing at least 8 hours before and after the retreat (which starts 1st november). But at the same time trying to no get too clingy.

Doing rapid noting. My practice with fire kasina was great, got into really concentrated states, but i live in a very noisy environment and this is not really conducive to a practice like that. Vipassana gives more freedom in that sense. Also missing a teacher, right now im not in the financial situation to getting
instruction, but once i get to second path i will make an effort to contact one, since i heard that things get more complicated by then.

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Kaloyan Stefanov, modified 2 Years ago at 10/18/21 5:58 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 10/18/21 5:58 AM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 83 Join Date: 2/18/21 Recent Posts
Hey Jake, good to hear from you! Vipassana is indeed more conductive to non-perfect conditions - depending on your predisposition and progress, you might find that you can do vipassana during daily activities as well. You mentioned you don't have a teacher (due to financials amongst others) but you feel you can benefit from one. If you feel like it, maybe we can help - this board is generally a good place to get advice on things.

​​​​​​​What are specifics that you feel you are struggling with or are impeding your progress?
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 10/29/21 5:39 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 10/29/21 5:39 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Thank you Mr Kaloyan for your help and good intentions, is people like you who makes this place so great. Right now i don´t think there is something impeding my progress, i´m feeling my concentration getting better and the sits are getting easier, the aversion and axiey and less predominant until i get to this phase when i feel very calm and i think is probably equanimity but im not sure. My main concern right know is when to stop noting. I´ve read in mctb that there is a moment when you should stop noting and instead go for a more "direct" approach (Maybe hight equanimity?). But so far so good, thank you again for your help.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 10/29/21 5:42 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 10/29/21 5:42 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Did 4 hours of noting plus 2 hours of fire kasina today. 3 days until the retreat starts. If i get stream entry in the retreat, great, if not, doesn´t matter, i have all of november, december and january to meditate intesively until the next semester starts. 
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 1/7/22 9:53 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/7/22 5:33 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Doing a fire kasina retreat right now since 1st January. Sucessfully being able to meditate for 9-10 hours a day with some peltor x5A earmuffs and some earplugs and i can´t hear a single thing. Planning to raise up to 12-13 hours in the following weeks. The retreat will last until 28th of this month.

Why i started doing fire kasina again? because honestly i really like it more than noting, i find it simpler to do, and more enjoyable, noise was the problem, and i already resolved it. 
This decision was motivated also by a discussion i had with Yadid Berman in November when he kindly gave me good advice on my technique. I realized my technique was far from perfect. Shortly after that, my earmuffs arrived and for my surprise i could use then for hours with no noticeable discomfort.

My experience so far:
The screen is really wide most of the time, with lots of flickering, brighter than usual, at some times it gets somewhat 3rd dimensional. But still didnt get 3d images ( Curiously enough, i got some of these photorrealistic images years ago when i was just starting with the practice.) Im trying to just observe the impermanence of the screen instead of working on control, this was the advice of some practitioners in the fire kasina webpage recordings.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 1/17/22 2:38 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/17/22 2:38 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Update on my "retreat":
The last days i lowered the dose from 10 hours to 5-6 hours because i had really bad sleep the past few days and feel really tired. I´ve always had problems with sleep but recently it got worse, also, i had some symptomps of psychosis (maybe) i had the feeling that i was manifesting a bunch of stuff i didn´t want to manifest. This is another problem of doing the practice at home i think. That, and the fact that is really difficult to keep myself away from distractions. Anyways, i still have two weeks left so i plan to up the dose again. 
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 1/17/22 2:41 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/17/22 2:41 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
I plan to do another 2 week retrear in april and maybe doing a month retreat in thailand in june.
Jake Frankfurt Middenhall, modified 2 Years ago at 1/19/22 3:49 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/19/22 3:49 PM

RE: Jake Franfurt Fire kasina log

Posts: 110 Join Date: 9/12/18 Recent Posts
Stopping the fire kasina practice. It was cool, did some progres, passed thru all the dukkha nanas and spending some time in equanimity, and while there, i experienced some weird 3d screen shifts. 
I´m done for now, shifting to some noting and some metta practice.

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