anything and everything

emily keegan, modified 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 4:11 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 4:04 AM

anything and everything

Posts: 3 Join Date: 1/14/21 Recent Posts
a vast, billowing profusion of gnarled shape and biological form.
filling your whole body, vast space, feeling wonder that you do not explode.³
a body which is obese and thin as a skeleton, thin as twigs at the same time.
a field of rot and screaming which is the same phenomenon as a still field of calm blankness.¹
this being present makes it clear that all words i use, all specific thoughts, are violent bindings of ignoring this underlying nature of mind.
when i go about my day and feel my lips, my hands, my eyes, i cut off almost everything which exists.
the words i know are a tragedy, or even a betrayal of reality.

the suddenness of this - i did not mean for this to happen when i lay down tonight - of course, i mean, of course, i grieve to have said anything at all.
i've always wanted to study mathematics but i haven't any idea how i could find my way to mathematics from this and if it was math in the normal way what would be the point? ²

¹ a warm smoothness. feeling this perspective alongside that rapidly churning infinity and feeling like they are representing something which is the same
² rhetorical question
³ only relatively mildly distracted by such fearful thoughts due to a series of experiences with not exploding

what- experience? what? please what, i could use some what. i mean it feels obviously vile and depraved to go about trying to use, ugh, abstraction to do anything but in light of this i could still use some what, please. yall have these lingual frameworks and i have familiarity with some of them, a handful of years meditating with mctb in context, etc
Zarbook !, modified 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 3:06 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 3:05 PM

RE: anything and everything

Posts: 49 Join Date: 3/17/21 Recent Posts
This post is brought to you by

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Order now at www.ineffabilities.gov, and remember, not being able to put it into words is one of the defining characteristics of ________. 

"The words I know are a tragedy, or even a betrayal of reality"

Gosh golly that's gorgeous. Ineffability is rough for poets, or maybe what makes them! 

"when i go about my day and feel my lips, my hands, my eyes, i cut off almost everything which exists."

​​​​​​​Do you know about "exteroception"?

 

 
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J W, modified 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 5:30 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 5:30 PM

RE: anything and everything

Posts: 694 Join Date: 2/11/20 Recent Posts
Ineffabiliteas - the teas that leave you speechless!

Pairs nicely with Cooldude XRay glasses, which allows one to magically see-through/ignore any posts which may trigger or offend them for whatever reason no matter how silly or strange... so that they can enjoy their ineffabilitea undisturbed! emoticon

Seriously tho, sounds like fun stuff whatever it is emily, hope you enjoy browsing the forum here and if you do have questions just remember more detail is always better! emoticon 

​​​​​​​Peace
Zarbook !, modified 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 6:06 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 6:06 PM

RE: anything and everything

Posts: 49 Join Date: 3/17/21 Recent Posts
Maybe that had more spice than I intended... that was all meant in fun and commiseration. Not trolling or triggered! Exteroception was especially sincere.
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J W, modified 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 8:56 PM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/9/22 8:56 PM

RE: anything and everything

Posts: 694 Join Date: 2/11/20 Recent Posts
I know emoticon
emily keegan, modified 2 Years ago at 1/10/22 12:09 AM
Created 2 Years ago at 1/10/22 12:09 AM

RE: anything and everything

Posts: 3 Join Date: 1/14/21 Recent Posts
i keep reading this and cackling, you got me right in the rofl