On Girlfriends and Relationships

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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:41 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:32 AM

On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
So even if you don't think so, I actually think quite highly of you guys, so I was wondering what your opinions were on relationships, girlfriends etc.

Are you straight up Buddhist? (avoid all desire), do you think it's worth pursuing, do you not care etc?

I used pull a lot of girls, but nowadays they don't seem to like me. I complain to myself a lot about this. Mainly because I think I'm a great guy (extroverted, popular, have been said to be good looking, I write or wrote psychonautic fiction, I dance pretty well (bboy), unique, knowledgeable about philosophy and religion, responsible, have a bright future).

But then they don't seem to care, which seems to bug me.

Anyways what doo you think? Should I avoid it? Is it a distraction?

I have relatively no complaints about my life actually, this is just a minor thing. I don't worry about the future any more and i feel as if I have a job in the pocket, so to speak.

What are your personal experiences with this, spiritually speaking?
m m a, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:46 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:46 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 153 Join Date: 6/9/11 Recent Posts
girls don't like the things you listed about yourself

they like people

it seems like you want some internet forum to say, 'No james, its okay that you don't have a GF, even though you want one. Its all for a greater purpose that you are single.'


cmon bro. nut up. live your life. with or without a girl.

-max
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:49 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:49 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
I don't see how being single would be for the greater purpose, so I'll decline commenting on that. I only listed those things for the sake of comprehensiveness, plus I didn't want to regret leaving anything out. I mean I feel relatively good about myself.

True story.

Lulz
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:52 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:52 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
they like people


Ha you know I just thought of something funny

I must not be a person then.

Unless if by people you mean ordinary, neurotic, stressed people with low self esteem.

Other than that it's a good quote, I actually agree with you.
m m a, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:56 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:53 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 153 Join Date: 6/9/11 Recent Posts
its just that you referred to it as a possible distraction. Distraction from what?


edited:

didn't see your second post

I'm a little thrown by you, dude. First you say you feel good about yourself, then you say you have low self-esteem.

you've said both 'i see why girls dont like me' and 'why wouldnt they like me'?

all girls don't like all people, find your own
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:58 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:56 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
Sorry I was being disingenuous, I'm not on spiritual quest, therefore there is no possibility of a distraction.
m m a, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:57 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:57 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 153 Join Date: 6/9/11 Recent Posts
okay, then why this thread?
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:59 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:59 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
Conversational purposes I suppose, people here hate me, so I thought I would extend myself and show that I can talk.

Plus talking on the internet is a pastime for me (or trolling), although, I'm not trolling right now in the sense of lying.

lawl

Thanks for responding though.

:-D
m m a, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:06 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:06 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 153 Join Date: 6/9/11 Recent Posts
james. bro. james.


I'm very sure nobody here hates you and I can say this with great confidence.

Not because I remember any forum interactions from the past; I don't.
Not because I know any of these people personally; I don't.

I say it because

1) nobody gives a crap about you enough to invest energy hating you
2) people here tend to be a lot less hateful than the average person
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:10 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:10 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
That is only slightly comforting.

=p

But if you don't remember any past interactions I'll fill you in,

I'm supposed to be the forum troll.

LOL

Or not really, Nikolai and another member Celery Head seem to think so (that I am a troll).
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:21 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:21 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
m m a:
its just that you referred to it as a possible distraction. Distraction from what?


edited:

didn't see your second post

I'm a little thrown by you, dude. First you say you feel good about yourself, then you say you have low self-esteem.

you've said both 'i see why girls dont like me' and 'why wouldnt they like me'?

all girls don't like all people, find your own



Oh, what I thought you meant was that girls llke people that are "fully human":

that have cares and worries and emotions and all that.

Hence all the adjectives that I threw in.

Like:

"Oh I want a guy that has a heart, that gets angry and sad sometimes, that worries so that I can take care of him."

That's what I thought you meant. =p I wasn't describing myself. If you can't already tell I more or less think such a notion is ridiculous, a person should be as happy as possible.
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josh r s, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:47 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 10:47 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 337 Join Date: 9/16/11 Recent Posts
James go meditate, if you feel some ego-tension stuff that makes you want to post absurd stuff, or do whatever else it is you do that when you look at it doesn't lead to your long-term happiness and welfare, just sit down be mindful of your breathing and relax. this is basically straight from the suttas which you seem to hold in high regard.
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 11:09 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 11:09 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
I honestly feel pretty good, so uh, yeah.

Even though my stuff may seem nonsensical. But then Richard's stuff seem full of hatred but you guys still listen to him.

Anyways I don't experience this ego tension or whatever.

Also following the suttas requires a radical revision in attitude, revamping your whole life, something I'm not really willing to do, not just following some off hand advice.
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josh r s, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 1:18 PM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 1:18 PM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 337 Join Date: 9/16/11 Recent Posts
you guys

no i dont really listen to any of Richards stuff, were you addressing me? I think Jake already has pointed out to you that "The DhO" isnt a single entity that practices all in the exact same way or thinks the same things.
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Yadid dee, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 1:50 PM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 1:46 PM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 258 Join Date: 9/11/09 Recent Posts
It seems that the only skillful way to participate in discussions with people such as James Yen and others who post lots of criticism and negativity, and seem to have little insight, is to try to steer the conversation into something productive and helpful, the rest just seems like a waste of time.

Yes, when I read James' posts I also think 'wow this dude has no idea and is overly deluded', but trying to preach the gospel to the dude doesn't seem to have any effect what so ever.. in fact, it seems to only make the silly conversations continue.

So.. here's my attempt at something fruitful:

James. You claim that you are happy and thats all that you need, and do not think some sort of spiritual practice towards enlightenment would help you.
Though you do seem to have a very strong emotional response towards these issues (spiritual practice and enlightenment). Could it be that deep down, you actually do want to gain some sort of insight or enlightenment?

When Nikolai calls your posts 'trolling', in my opinion, he means that you write lies and jokes which stem from your own negative emotions, masked by a sense of humour, in order to evoke some emotional response and posts from the readers, so that in turn you will get some satisfaction or whatever.. Could it be?
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 6:09 PM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 6:03 PM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
Hi yadid,

Ok one second.

Edit:

Ok, let me make it clear, I don't believe, that there is any GENUINE INSIGHT HERE.

This is why I fail to take this place seriously, and thus post whatever the hell I want.

I may be crazy (actually I'm not crazy at all), but so are ALL OF YOU GUYS.

But I am actually happy though. Consequently I have no deep-seated emotional problems, I have no delusions, no repressions no whatever. Period.

My only complaint is the girlfriend thing, which I have voiced, but then again, that doesn't make me UNhappy.

That's just it, if I really thought there was a sincere interaction with the Dhamma here, I would probably be scared shitless about posting, but since I don't think anyone is for real. I consequently, post whatever, kind of.
m m a, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 6:57 PM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 6:57 PM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 153 Join Date: 6/9/11 Recent Posts
i've yet to have a interaction devoid of dharma, here or anywhere.
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 7:54 PM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 7:54 PM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
So, if I understand you correctly, everyone here is following the Dharma?

aight

Also, it seems in your daily life everyone follows the dharma? Cool that.

*sigh*

=p
m m a, modified 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:10 PM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/28/11 9:10 PM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 153 Join Date: 6/9/11 Recent Posts
What is the difference between dharma and not-dharma
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Yadid dee, modified 10 Years ago at 12/29/11 1:48 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/29/11 1:22 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 258 Join Date: 9/11/09 Recent Posts
James Yen:
Hi yadid,

Ok one second.

Edit:

Ok, let me make it clear, I don't believe, that there is any GENUINE INSIGHT HERE.

This is why I fail to take this place seriously, and thus post whatever the hell I want.

I may be crazy (actually I'm not crazy at all), but so are ALL OF YOU GUYS.

But I am actually happy though. Consequently I have no deep-seated emotional problems, I have no delusions, no repressions no whatever. Period.

My only complaint is the girlfriend thing, which I have voiced, but then again, that doesn't make me UNhappy.

That's just it, if I really thought there was a sincere interaction with the Dhamma here, I would probably be scared shitless about posting, but since I don't think anyone is for real. I consequently, post whatever, kind of.




Hi James,


You didn't answer any of my questions..

How did you first come in contact with Buddhism?
Do you feel strongly about Buddhism / Enlightenment?
Do you wish to gain insight / enlightenment / meditate?

And in regards to you having no delusions, please see the definition of delusion:
Wikipedia:
A delusion is a false belief held with absolute conviction despite superior evidence

You may be absolutely convicted that you have no delusions, but the superior evidence (Your strange posts on this forum) say otherwise.

One further example of your strange shenanigans is that you have posted (until you got banned, it seems) on Satanic forums..
A quick Google search for your nickname (bBoyYen):
bboyyen site:satansarmy.4rumer.net
Reveals quite a bit.. so basically you just argue with people on the Internet on various forums, eh?
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James Yen, modified 10 Years ago at 12/29/11 1:59 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/29/11 1:59 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 270 Join Date: 9/6/09 Recent Posts
Please feel free to search my other usernames: creekutsu and creekist

Blah and blahblahbleoh

I have argued quite a bit I believe on an astrology forum.

Anyways I will answer your questions.

I came into contact with Buddhism likely in 2004 through the book liberating insight by Frits koster.

I feel very strongly that certain people do not practice Buddhism at all.

I would like, sort of, to attain enlightenment, but then again, who cares?
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Yadid dee, modified 10 Years ago at 12/29/11 2:01 AM
Created 10 Years ago at 12/29/11 2:01 AM

RE: On Girlfriends and Relationships

Posts: 258 Join Date: 9/11/09 Recent Posts
James Yen:
Please feel free to search my other usernames: creekutsu and creekist

Blah and blahblahbleoh

I have argued quite a bit I believe on an astrology forum.

Anyways I will answer your questions.

I came into contact with Buddhism likely in 2004 through the book liberating insight by Frits koster.

I feel very strongly that certain people do not practice Buddhism at all.

I would like, sort of, to attain enlightenment, but then again, who cares?


Hi James,

You care, presumably, and I care, too.

I understand that you feel strongly that certain people do not practice Buddhism at all, thats ok.
Do you practice Buddhism, or do you wish to do so sometime in the future?

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