Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 7/15/12 2:23 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/15/12 2:22 PM

Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
July 15, 2012:

[So, I'm starting a new log, partly in order to be under the proper heading of "Practice Logs" at the Dharma Overground, and partly due to not posting any updates in a while, and feeling as though I need a fresh start (with my practice, and with keeping track of it).]

Sat for 50 minutes. I'm going to try to stick to sitting for this duration indefinitely (on a daily basis).

I think I experienced 1st jhana, but can't be sure. It was very easy for me to dismiss enticing thought-trains, begging me to get lost in them and engage in "contemplation." I kept returning my attention to the kasina, and toward the end of my sit, began experiencing a subtle enjoyment/pleasure from being with the kasina, and not thoughts (this is the reason I think I experienced 1st jhana -- the "pleasure/bliss" factor).

I think I also did some "noting." By this I mean whenever I caught myself thinking about what to do after the sit, or with the rest of my day, I just mentally called out/labeled that "planning," and simply returned all my attention to the kasina. Is this an example of noting?

I've been very good with sitting every day lately -- basically, I make sure to sit as soon as I wake up. "Get it out of the way," so to speak.

[Edited to acknowledge the question I asked on this post.]
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 7/15/12 11:47 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/15/12 11:47 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
2nd 50-minute sit of the day (July 15):

Got to a point where the mind felt really settled. I could really see what is meant by "me" not being my thoughts. Thoughts came and went, but they didn't distract me from my central focus on the kasina. The experience was almost effortless, but not entirely so. I believe I was reasonably well-established in the 1st jhana, although the pleasure factor wasn't intense, and neither were there any hard jhanic qualities.

At one point I struggled pretty hard to stay concentrated on my object because it felt as though I must've been sitting for longer than 50 minutes (that somehow the alarm hadn't gone off). However, I reminded myself that I had had this experience of restlessness before, and just stayed with the kasina.

I think I have a better understanding of what a 50-minute sit "feels" like, and I am thinking that the particular form of restlessness described above will occur less and less in the future.
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 7/22/12 10:40 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/22/12 10:40 AM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
July 22, 2012 (50-minute morning sit):

I was able to successfully stay with the kasina pretty much for the entire duration. The desire arose to analyze the sit, during the sit (e.g. "Am I in 1st jhana?"), and I chose instead to concentrate on my object. I'm continuously trying to work on building my concentration during samatha sits.

I'm using an essay called Progressive Stages of Meditation in Plain English as the template for my daily practice. One of the suggestions in that essay is to determine to practice well throughout the entire practice period, regardless of how the sit goes. Keeping this suggestion in mind has been making it fairly easy for me to stick with my object, as opposed to getting lost in thoughts, or emotions.
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Brian Eleven, modified 11 Years ago at 7/22/12 9:53 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/22/12 9:53 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 221 Join Date: 9/14/10 Recent Posts
Rashed,
Thanks for the link! Seems like a very good and simple explanation/description.
Best of luck with your practice.

Metta,

Brian.
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Zyndo Zyhion, modified 11 Years ago at 7/23/12 1:11 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/23/12 1:11 AM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 168 Join Date: 8/6/10 Recent Posts
Here is a Jhana thread. G' Luck. Neem
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 7/23/12 4:09 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/23/12 4:09 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
No problem guys, and thanks (especially for the link to the thread on jhanas)!

July 23 (50-minute sit):

Think I briefly experienced 1st jhana. I'm unclear on exactly what is meant by "applied thought," but I think I experienced it. Basically, at one point I found myself having thoughts about the kasina (a flame), about how it was more important for me to just "stay with it" as opposed to think about other important, ongoing issues in my life. For example, at certain points during the sit, I noticed that I'd begun thinking about a special someone, and instead of letting that continue, I brought my attention back to the kasina. However, thoughts did not entirely stop after I did so. It was as though I was using all of my attention to notice the features of the kasina (the depth of concentration I was experiencing allowed the experience to not be boring), and thoughts related to that activity of paying exclusive attention to the kasina popped up now and then (this is what I'm thinking was "applied thought").

I apparently still have a fairly large amount of expectations as far how intense and "altered" the experience of jhanas may be. So I'd say when I ended my sit, I felt a little disappointed at not having gotten to experience rapture/piti, or very potent bliss.

However, I'm satisfied with how I was able to sit for 50 minutes, largely unperturbed by inner (and outer) distractions. In my mind, I'm doing everything I "should" do when it comes to a samatha sit -- and this includes turning my attention away from the frustration that arises at "cool jhanic stuff" not happening yet, and placing it on the kasina (which paradoxically is supposed to lead to the jhanas).

I've decided to have a conservative approach with regard to how I view my sits. For instance, I think I may have entered 1st jhana fairly early on in the sit, but since I'm not sure, I'm just calling it Access Concentration instead.

I don't know if it's smart to think of it like this, but basically when anxiety/restlessness is largely absent, and my mind is "getting into" just observing the kasina -- that's when I think I've arrived to the 1st jhana.
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 7/30/12 11:44 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 7/30/12 11:44 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
July 31 (35-minute sit):

Felt rather "settled" toward the end of my sit after paying exclusive attention to the kasina, trying my best to use full-minded awareness as I did so.

There was a point during the sit when I felt stored tensions in different parts of my body -- the area of my arm around the elbow, for instance -- dissipate as a result of concentrating on the kasina. My arm just went "limp" in a manner of speaking, which made me realize that effort was being put into keeping it in a certain position -- effort that I wasn't even aware of.

I also felt as though I went pretty "deep" into a state of concentration, without it becoming a hard jhana. I was aware of the fear I associate with being fully responsible for my actions in an existential sense -- even simple actions such as having to get up early, clearing my mind, and starting my day -- and I simply sat with that feeling of fear (it lessened).
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 8/3/12 12:29 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/3/12 12:29 AM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
August 3 (35-minute sit):

I was unhappy with how my sits were turning out for approximately the last month. I closely analyzed every aspect of my samatha sits, and have decided that the only thing that it makes sense to alter is what I define as my "kasina." Up till now, it had been a flame + an area of the oil lamp illuminated by the flame. Now I am focusing just on the flame, and nothing else.

Having made this switch, my sit felt noticeably "clearer" and a bit more "intense"/focused. It felt as though something was happening whereas for a while I had been feeling as though I was just sitting perfunctorily.

I am going to stay on this train for a while (at least a month) and see what happens.
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 8/5/12 1:26 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/5/12 1:26 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
August 5 (50-minute sit):

At one point (somewhere after 35 minutes), staying centered on the kasina felt effortless. I wonder if that meant I was in the 2nd jhana. However, my focus didn't widen like it's supposed to in the 2nd jhana (according to MCTB ), so I just continued to apply a subtle amount of effort to pay exclusive attention to my chosen kasina, and nothing else. I did not let the experience of relative effortlessness "bait" me into trying to move to the 2nd jhana.

I felt as though not much effort at all was required to stay in that state, and that I could really just "get into it" and sustain it for a long time, if I wanted. Instead of feeling as though I was having to put effort into doing something that wasn't very interesting, it felt as though I was glad to be doing it. I was appreciating (and enjoying) the calmness and the almost "imperturbable" quality of my mind.
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 8/13/12 11:41 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/13/12 11:41 AM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
August 13 (55-minute sit):

Since I've been a little frustrated with the depth of concentration that I've been achieving in my sits -- as well as the fact that I can't seem to be getting to 2nd jhana -- I've been open to trying out new things in my samatha sits. One of these things is playing meditative, calming background music while I sit. This was suggested in a book called How God Changes Your Brain by Andrew Newberg.

So far, so good. I do not perceive a noticeable difference, but the music does allow me to shut out more distracting noises (for instance, I live in a basement, and if someone is upstairs I can clearly hear them "stomping" around, which is annoying when I'm trying to meditate).

During this sit, I achieved a very deep and stable state of calmness. I was so focused on the kasina toward the end of the sit that when the alarm went off, it didn't jar me at all.

I've been wondering if I'm "supposed" to close my eyes and focus on the "after-image" of the flame at some point. As it is, I keep my eyes open the whole time. To be honest, I think I tried closing my eyes in the past, but never got to see an after-image (and that's why I've stuck to keeping my eyes open, focusing on the physical kasina that I start out with).
End in Sight, modified 11 Years ago at 8/13/12 12:14 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/13/12 12:14 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

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Rashed Arafat:
Since I've been a little frustrated with the depth of concentration that I've been achieving in my sits


How much mindfulness do you currently practice in everyday life?

If I recall, that's somewhere you didn't want to bring your practice in the past, but maybe things have changed (or maybe I'm misremembering, or misunderstood the first time around).
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 8/13/12 8:57 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/13/12 8:57 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
You remembered correctly, End in Sight. I will have to look into your suggestion. The reason I never tried it out is because of a concept from psychology that made sense to me, which basically says that when you are working on something, work really hard at it. However, once you're done with it, put it behind yourself and go forth and enjoy your day/allow yourself to have fun.

That's the basic conceptual framework that I've been bringing to my spiritual seeking, I would say. While practicing, I focus 100% on the actual act of practicing. However, once I'm done, I try to not hang on to that attitude of being mindful as I'm going about my daily activities.

I find that I get discouraged very easily if I do not have a very concrete plan for my day. For instance, if my day looks something like this:

meditate --> work --> do yoga --> eat dinner --> play guitar/work on music --> watch a movie --> meditate



then I can be very mindful during each activity (and not so mindful in between). And I guess maybe that's what you mean by being mindful during my daily activities. However, there are days/times when I do not plan out my day as I just showed above (aside from making sure to practice), and it's very hard for me to be mindful of "bare existence" like that. I guess I need to feel as though I am being very productive in order to be mindful.

So, I'm going to try and plan out my days better with "meaningful" activities to encourage mindfulness.
End in Sight, modified 11 Years ago at 8/14/12 11:09 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/14/12 11:09 AM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 1251 Join Date: 7/6/11 Recent Posts
Rashed Arafat:
However, there are days/times when I do not plan out my day as I just showed above (aside from making sure to practice), and it's very hard for me to be mindful of "bare existence" like that. I guess I need to feel as though I am being very productive in order to be mindful.


Is it because, if you feel unproductive, then you feel unhappy, and you don't really enjoy mindfulness of unhappiness?

While practicing, I focus 100% on the actual act of practicing. However, once I'm done, I try to not hang on to that attitude of being mindful as I'm going about my daily activities.


If you found that the attitude of being mindful helped your daily activities be more pleasant (in addition to whatever good effects it might have on your concentration), would that change things for you?
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Rashed Arafat, modified 11 Years ago at 8/14/12 8:37 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 8/14/12 1:30 PM

RE: Rashed's (New) Training in Concentration Log

Posts: 155 Join Date: 7/13/11 Recent Posts
End in Sight:
Is it because, if you feel unproductive, then you feel unhappy, and you don't really enjoy mindfulness of unhappiness?

Bingo. To be precise: I feel as though I don't know what to do with myself. I feel "useless," listless, and bored. Fidgety. Being mindful of unhappiness -- or the feeling of uselessness -- is the last thing on my mind during such times.

End in Sight:
If you found that the attitude of being mindful helped your daily activities be more pleasant (in addition to whatever good effects it might have on your concentration), would that change things for you?

I believe it would. I suppose I'm resistant to being mindful after I've already put in very focused effort into being that way for a predefined period of time. It's as though I expect the results of my effort to spread out like a wave throughout the rest of my day. Having to constantly put in effort at being mindful -- especially after I've already done so "formally" -- makes even fun not seem like fun. It's as though I have to be alert on some small level 100% of the time, and can never allow myself to take a break (which I think is necessary every now and then for healthy functioning of the psyche, and the body).

I suppose you might say why can't I be mindful of "taking a break" -- and I guess I'd say that mindfulness to me by definition is a form of work, and the very point of taking a break is taking a break from working.

[Edited for clarity/effective communication]

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