Day 2
1st EQ w/ anapana

Day 3
Cycling from start to EQ. A&P bit more bouncy with better concentration.
Cycling through touch/sight/sound walking. After 1/2hr the garden becomes the "magic garden"! RO dominant later in day as I get tired.

Day 4
Further into EQ with anapana. RO taking 10mins. Sometimes scanning. Leaning to breath tho. Exploring self in head made me very uncomfy. Heart started to race. Felt scared. Not sure in high enough EQ. Could not perceive any watcher at one point. Just sensations. Did front/back of head trick. Very effective!

In anapana EQ bearing down upon the spot for all ur worth just gives headache. Loose, light and wide is a winner though. Expand to breathe thru whole body.
Moving to scanning just seems to make me fall back toward RO. Quiet sure I have experienced a kind of DN loop within low EQ.

I take it back. Jury still out. Problem is I don't know what else to do when breath seems to tight an object.
Headaches get stronger as day progresses. Certain not a nana symptom tho. Hangover form RO or concentration or both. May have to take it easier tomorrow. By 5pm I'm wiped!

Day 5
Noticed cause/effect first time ever while walking after breakfast. Oh, sound,image,story! Etc. explains why sat in weak 1st jhana in first sit before breakfast. Seems I start from scratch each morning.

A/P first group sit. Quickly thru DN into low EQ. Low EQ is my current base it seems.
Experimented with just watching the Jhanic like state after lunch. A kind of 3rd maybe. Seems real stable in a sensationfest unstable way. It does change eventually but this is the slow route. Scanning moves me forward. Still in low EQ. Next sit they will teach vipassana hehe...

Concentration headache dominates even low EQ (no, I'm certain it's not RO). Dry vipassana is unpleasant to say the least. Probably to late today, I've made no real progress. Let's hope a good sleep and a focus on jhana tomorrow will help. And do les sits! This is always my problem: trying to hard and burning out!

In break did jhana sweeping per kayagatasati Sutta. Bingo. First taste of EQ proper, almost no headache, very easy. Sweeping entire body in a breath.
No more dry work period! It's tiring and unprofitable. If cant get into jhana for some reason go for a walk.

Day 6
Couldn't sleep for vibrations last night. When I finally let them do there thing I had one of my classic "blip" moments complete with zooming magnification then a lump/lozenge of energy come up back of neck and gently explode. Then I could sleep. Not had one of these in weeks.

Cycling between RO and high eq today. Anapana sent me so high I was sure this was it. Noted mind states, decision, intention etc.
Playing it by ear.
Felt very happy/satisfied last couple days. Like all is well with world. Started to have funny thoughts aswell. Like the Buddha doing the told you so dance!
Teacher says the blips are impermanent!...

Day 7
4:30 sit: 0-EQ = 15mins. Unbelievable. Anapana in the mornings, scanning after lunch works best. Tight focus to spin up the mind then wide focuss to not get over concentrated.
Very strong, clean 3rd jhana. The strand of experience to kick into is located in the third eye region (doing by pure feeling rather than breath). Need to confirm.

Is 4th what is left when this pleasure disappears? It would seem so. Sweeping from this vantage point was very good. Particularly for pre-lunch!

Good sweeping within jhana before break. Lot of investigation of where self is but maybe my "high eq" is not as high as I'd Like to think? No spontaneous formless realms for eg.

Kayagatasati is sick.

I'm not familiar with body-scanning, but in the past I had tried the 31 body parts meditation, an asubha-sanna, essentially.

Good luck with that.

Very strong, clean 3rd jhana. The strand of experience to kick into is located in the third eye region (doing by pure feeling rather than breath). Need to confirm.

I've also noticed that I can move my focus to other chakras, especially the throat area, after I'm in this state and the experience takes on a different character.

Better mindfulness during daily life - though I rather imagine it may be as hard to remember to note as it is to remain with sensations...

Baggy Old Saggy Old Cat:

- Start off with mindfulness only of mental activity. You'll be used to bare awareness of the body so the contrast might help.

On the other hand, play the 'six sense doors' game and intentionally hit each. What are you touching? Then... what are you smelling? Then... what are you thinking... etc.

Hi Eric, thanks for that. Good stuff.

Im right with you on returning to the anapana spot from time to time. I completely missed that in my notes, but have been doing it for quite a while. I also lightly body scan from time to time as per the instructions in the kayagatasati sutta. Returning to the spot will deepen the absorption as you say, but it's also a very good way to "unstick" -- by unstick, I mean that sometimes it seems I am kind of fixed in a particular state and it is not "moving" --this kind of dynamic jhana practice means that the factors are constantly changing, are impermanent. Returning to the spot can get things moving again.

The close similarity between the vipassanā meditation taught in the tradition of U Ba Khin and the instructions given in the Dhyānasamādhi Sūtra finds further corroboration in the simile given in the Chinese discourse, which compares the pervasion of the whole body with awareness to water that enters into sand. This imagery fits well with a stage reached after sustained practice of the U Ba Khin method, when awareness has been refined to the point of enabling the meditator to experience sensations throughout the body during a single act of scanning the body. The tradition refers to this as “sweeping” the body in a “free flow”, expressions that reflect how awareness passes in a “sweeping” or “flowing” manner through the whole body within the time period it takes to breath in or to breath out.

The feeling of "no one home" isn't entirely new but its the strongest I've ever felt it. I would presume this is a good sign. I hope so. It felt like I was doing this right last night. I don't think I have really concentrated on the 3C's this well until I read Nick's recent explanation. It still seems to simple but it certainly seems to be doing something...

This would seem to indicate that Im not spinning my wheels but I'd welcome any thoughts on whether the "boredom" in equanimity sounds right from any with experience of the territory.

My practice has been dominated by an extended period in Equanimity. I often go through the DN to get there but it is mostly quick and done in one sit. Sometimes when I'm sick / tired I stay in Reobservation.

So, through knowledge of equanimity about formations, which is endowed with many virtues, blessings, and powers, he notices the formations as they occur.

Again, this is to me a very useful indicator. If there is no dissatisfaction in equanimity, there is no going further. But because equanimity has nothing permanent nor permanently satisfactory in it a person is driven by this dissatisfaction to renew practice. While there can be a mad dash to try something new, to try a new practice, to try a new job, whatever, the knowledge of equanimity gets very clear in becoming naturally impartial to this stage, its extended period, its boredom, it's "what next?", its how to break through.

From a meditative angle (to set this post apart from the one above talking about daily sati) I think this is the area of equanimity wherein one can start to sit -- set a timer -- and just sit. I think an hour is useful Sitting past one's normal stopping point by 15-20 minutes I think is also useful. Stop the sit for no reason (but for you know, family, emergency). I am hearing routinely from friends that they are hitting a wall at 45 minutes and it seems to correspond with the stage of starting high equanimity.

-- 15-30 initial minutes of dedicated anapanasati focus - more rigorous, the focus is helping all these sparrows of thought settle, stop flying up.Herein, there's the likehood of a few narratives really collecting the mind's attention (aka: daydreaming)
-- 30-45 minutes: here the little sparrows of many thoughts have calmed and either a) the mind will grow bright*** because calm abiding and relaxed attention is happening or b) the body may start to ache because all thoughts are organizing onto some singular resistance/attraction: Where is that brightness?/what can I do here? If there's too much looseness, then sleepiness gets intense here.

-45-70 minutes: for a person developing high equanimity, here's where the mind really is willing to let go, no worries about nimitta, jhana, whatever. If there was sleepiness, there is suddenly bolt awakeness. Images/thoughts may fly up like sparrows, but they are phenomena the mind can witness, there is no ability to be pulled in, so the speed of them may become rapid-fire. Anything can arise here, mind is very loose [and attentive, but another skhanda may be more prominent so there may not be the feeling of volition directing of attention -- to me in fact, the volition aspect is quite reduced---once sleepiness is overcome (through volition) then the mind has a relaxed state, but loose, wherein other skhanda can rise, and consciousness can attend, while the sankhara aspect is naturally now placid]. If one is practicing satipatthana of the senses, here is where the senses can go unrecognized by the mind: the skhanda of recognition settles quite a bit ("What that smell or taste that just happened?" the arising mind may ask before dissolving back down). If the mind enters open awareness, then the mind may start experience stuff for which there's just really no vocabulary, but can be viewed like just so many brands of jam--here too the mind develops equanimity to this: not trying to catch anything; if at anapanasati, the breathing channel, the stomach rising, the nostrils, the windpipe may all become like cosmos-size pure machinery...whatever. If holding this stuff, it's rubbish, but natural to enjoy it/run after it for the first few times. The point is not what I am writing as example, the point is this stage of sitting to sit, letting go, is useful, fun, and comes because one only sits. I think this area you may be entering is... well, I don't want to set up expectation. So, yes, it's just sitting despite that/because sitting is 'boring'.

This is from The Progress of Insight and knowledge of emergeance. I put it here for inspiration about the value of the boredom of this area, that it provokes just sitting, *sigh* sitting, sitting. In your experience 'boredom' and willingness to just sit, the mind shows here how it is endowed as Venerable Mahasi Sayadaw wrote. Oh, one morning passes? Totally boring, good. Oh, two weeks, pass totally boring, yet one is getting up for the alarm and just sitting, good. Very useful.

Is paying attention to the 3C's in Equanimity enough to do it?

Is paying attention to the 3C's in Equanimity enough to do it?

Yes, of course it is... don't worry,

Is that your own experience Mario?

Interesting stuff. What kind of practice were you doing? Can you describe what you were focusing on in EQ when this happened Mario?

taking the 2nd through 4th foundations of mindfulness and seeing them as "Not I, not mine, not myself"

First of all, may the aggregates coventionally known as BTG have a fruitful retreat.

So I've been having all sorts of weird pressure and energy surges (for the lack of better labels) that past few days, but nothing that hasn't happened before. I'd been to a teaching recently by the Ven Sayalay Susila, who is a student of Ven. Pa Auk Sayadaw, where she advocated taking the 2nd through 4th foundations of mindfulness and seeing them as "Not I, not mine, not myself". I've found this more effective than just trying to note (noting has never worked for me). Taking this perspective to the pressure/surges/whatever, I've been more able to catch the aversion to what's going on, which normally i get carried off by it. I think it may be a good general purpose anatta shovel to take to whatever comes up. Annyhoo, I hope this may of some use.

Eric

How did you do this?
I mean, I think that with these instructions many people could come up with many different practices...

How did you do this?
I mean, I think that with these instructions many people could come up with many different practices...

The best way imho to do this is to try n remain focussed on one particular object...and then whatever else arises will be
directly and automatically known to be impermanent and not-self. You never willed it to arise because your whole
intention was to remain focussed on one particular object and yet it did arise and thus making it not-self..the added
advantage of this method is that it builds concentration along the way (which inevitably leads to waves of
piti , sukkha , passidhi)

Day 3
Delicious bounciness as I walked. A kind of jhana-lite. Odd pleasurable sensations in bum/tops of thighs and when sitting, centre of this pleasure is just below belly button. Spent most of today in a third jhana like state. Probably in low EQ now. Certainly beats the DN of yesterday
Started jhana/sweeping on day 2. Felt like the right move. And proved correct today. I am basically playing it by eat every sit. Sometimes anapana. Sometimes sweeping. Sometimes falling through layers and layers of vedana/jhanic stuff.

Day 4
Rode out DN in 3rd during 1st group sit. Easy.
4th jhana next. Long slow contraction after a while. Anicca and anatta both easy to see at same time.

Regressed once or twice but mostly in low EQ today with a couple of "spurts" into higher territory.
Felt like pineal gland was flickering for a while today as I tried to get a nap. Focusing on it sped it up to vanishing point. Could be my imagination though. Will watch for it again. Crown still has light pressure. Doesn't seem to move much. Maybe I just bumped my head! Hehe.
..
More sleep pills today. I am not letting myself burn up by day 5 as usual. So far taking one every other day seems to be keeping me on an even keel.

Day 5
Holding it together headache wise. Not burning out early this time. Breaks, not pushing it, sleeping pills...
Went through to EQ smoothly in first sit. No DN today at all.
Couple of really cutting edge spurts which were interesting. Mostly consisting of vastly speeding up of vibrations. So much so that it seemed hard to notice 3C's so fell back to just anicca which is fine.
Uneventful really though. I suppose that fits with this stage of EQ.
Most interesting thing was watching the mind while walking. I'd not really done this seriously before but when I kept drifting away from sensations and sounds to thoughts of an idea for work I decided to work with it. Very cool stuff. Could feel various small perceptual shifts as I did this. I was just noting "gone" whenever I noticed a thought and it vanished. This adding of mind as well as sensations / sounds to my walk seemed to have moments of really clear anatta. More tomorrow.
Sweeping has been good when I've done it. Really good penetration of spine.
Looking forward to breakfast already!

Spoke to soon! DN kicked my arse in the final group sit. Tiredness. Will have to start leaving that sit early starting tomorrow.

Day 6
Much of the same. When in EQ which was most of the time, quite uneventful. Walking was outstanding though. Noting talk, image, feel. Amazed that with almost every "talk" there was an accompanying image. I didn't think I ever much saw images. Almost not at all in fact. Turns out I just don't notice them, which is not the same thing at all.
Progress (or at least shifts of some kind) seem easily gained. Every time I catch a thought/image there is a sense if motion as my perspective pulls back from the thought to observe it (from being the thought to being the observer?) "I" seem to then be just behind my own head, or perhaps just right at the top/back and this is often accompanied by a sinking feeling and/or a "clearing", like reality's spectacles just got a huff and a wipe.
This does not really work when not walking though. Tried it when eating and having a shower and at best it just put a guard on the mind. Deliberate mindful actions and attention to sensations still seems best there. Wonder what that's all about?

Day 7
Much if the same.
Had one spurt into higher EQ but was still reactive so can't have been high EQ proper
Asked the teacher about watching the characteristic of anicca in the long slow expansions and contractions I experience. He said to stay with the body sensations. That following the expansions was an upakkalisa. One of the ten corruptions of insight. This makes sense to me. I will have to learn a bit more, but essentially the advice seems sound.
At the higher points of the day I've been very aware that where the body is almost air-like in its insubstantiality, there is this not unpleasant tension/solidity in/around the top forehead. When I rest my attention gently upon it it will move about a bit or even diffuse across the whole skull. But it will never entirely break up like the rest if the body. I'll bet that will go in high EQ. I'll further bet that it is "me". AND it is absolutely the same sensation that in the DN would be my "splitting headache"! No real surprise. I have noted this before. DN and EQ are the same thing viewed through different lenses.
Attention had begun to wander this afternoon. This is probably as far as ill get. Hopefully further learning EQ nana and leaving DN behind. I've spent over a year in the DN. it wouldn't be too dreadful spending the next year in EQ!

Hi Eric,

Fluttering would be the more accurate word, but it almost felt like an extremely rapid pulse (like a vein) and it was pretty much where that gland is supposed to be: about an inch inside the skull from around the third eye region.

I've not had it since though. Is this something you have more often?

Which sutta? That sounds most intriguing...

Having developed a mind of good will for seven years, then for seven aeons of contraction & expansion I didn't return to this world. Whenever the aeon was contracting, I went to the realm of Streaming Radiance. Whenever the aeon was expanding, I reappeared in an empty Brahma-abode.

Its like the feeling of motion as the body expands, but the perception of the body is still where it is (most of the time). I just get the sensation of expansion. It can go on for minutes on end. I get a similar thing with jhana factors. Sometimes they just increase and increase and increase.. with the expansions they reach a point where it is so intense I feel it cant possibly go any further, but it just continues. The "unbearable" becomes normal and it just keeps going.

I get this to a far lesser degree just sitting quietly in my living room, or at the computer. There is this kind of "wavering" very much like if you were lying on an inflatable in a slightly uncalm body of water. Just a gentle bobbing of "experience". Another way to describe it might be to say I am wavering in and out of "phase". I feel like im in startreck trying to materialise but can't for some reason.. heh!

This gentle bobbing experience often precedes some nana shift. I bob a bit, then things change...

Those are not great explanations. They're probably the best I can do though.

Which sutta? That sounds most intriguing...