A Confession

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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
My pain is great, therefore I must confess my faults.

In 2009 I joined this community, however, I was not ready for such spiritual development, and so, I split this once great community with my mind. In essence I caused a schism in the Sangha.

I confess too this fault, but not only that, even though the Buddha claimed that it is not possible for a layman to split the Sangha, I still did, and the aryan-Sangha at that!

In essence: I split the Sangha, with my mind.

This is my confession.
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
The fault was smoldering in my chest, it feels good to get it off.
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
Also, I appreciate anyone taking the time to read my confession. As that alone is sufficient. I don't expect anyone to reply, this something that I had to get off my chest.

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Nikolai ., modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 1650 Join Date: 1/23/10 Recent Posts
Not Important:
Also, I appreciate anyone taking the time to read my confession. As that alone is sufficient. I don't expect anyone to reply, this something that I had to get off my chest.

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Is that you, james?
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
Hi, yes, it's me.

I'm currently working on this whole remorse thing, as it's bugging me. It's kind of taking its toll actually. Anyways how are you? Don't let me bother you though, if you feel it is your duty to ban me, then please do, otherwise I'll continue to post here. However I would ask that you leave any posts made by me, be. As I don't want them deleted.

Actually I'm trying really hard right now to be sincere, so I would be glad if you can appreciate that.

Thanks Nikolai.
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Fitter Stoke, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 487 Join Date: 1/23/12 Recent Posts
Not Important:
I'm currently working on this whole remorse thing.


Why not work on the whole finding-something-else-to-do thing instead? My guess is that you're probably not as bad as you come across here, that interacting with people here prompts you to access less mature parts of your personality than would other activities, like bike-riding, playing a sport, finding a boyfriend/girlfriend, learning a language, or playing an instrument. Seriously. I'm guessing getting high and listening to music in the dark would probably be a more rewarding use of your time than hanging out here.
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
Hi Fitter,

Yes you're right, I'm not as bad as I come across here. However I enjoy posting here, I'm actually addicted come to think of it. So, I mean, I don't know. I mean at first I found it helpful to outlet all my stuff on the DhO, because then other parts of my life wouldn't suffer, now I'm just scared that it's possible that if I let other parts of my life suffer, then my DhO experience would be fine.

Sounds weird huh? That's honestly what I think though. I mean you can't win them all, you know.
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Nikolai ., modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 1650 Join Date: 1/23/10 Recent Posts
Not Important:
Hi Fitter,

Yes you're right, I'm not as bad as I come across here. However I enjoy posting here, I'm actually addicted come to think of it. So, I mean, I don't know. I mean at first I found it helpful to outlet all my stuff on the DhO, because then other parts of my life wouldn't suffer, now I'm just scared that it's possible that if I let other parts of my life suffer, then my DhO experience would be fine.

Sounds weird huh? That's honestly what I think though. I mean you can't win them all, you know.


I dont speak for all the other moderators and they may well decide to simply avoid any possibility of you repeating your past behaviour by banning this handle, but if that supposed sincerity suddenly is replaced by nonsense posts as we are used to from you now, banning again will be no questions asked and any attempt at sincerity will be the boy who cried wolf scenario (which is probably already the case). The dho forum seems to allow past banned handles to have their banning time out after some time and they can then change their handle and post again. For This reason and the fact that i dont see you spamming yet and the other moderators have yet to decide on what to do with you is why you can still post. I'd try my best to keep sincere.

Nick
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
Ok, no problem.
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Fitter Stoke, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 487 Join Date: 1/23/12 Recent Posts
Not Important:
Hi Fitter,

Yes you're right, I'm not as bad as I come across here. However I enjoy posting here, I'm actually addicted come to think of it. So, I mean, I don't know. I mean at first I found it helpful to outlet all my stuff on the DhO, because then other parts of my life wouldn't suffer, now I'm just scared that it's possible that if I let other parts of my life suffer, then my DhO experience would be fine.

Sounds weird huh? That's honestly what I think though. I mean you can't win them all, you know.


I still think the best thing for you would be to find something better to do with your time. If you're having that much trouble with your personal life, it would be better to seek professional help rather than inflict your stuff on a bunch of people you don't know, right?
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
No, my personal life is fine. I'm happy, I don't need professional help. My DhO life is not fine because people keep harassing me. That's what I mean.

Edit: What makes you think I'm inflicting suffering?
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Not Important, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 34 Join Date: 12/30/12 Recent Posts
Ok fine I'll leave.
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Daniel M. Ingram, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 3183 Join Date: 4/20/09 Recent Posts
The community split in the First Great DhO Schism when a number of those who founded it needed more space to do their own thing, combined with a number of other traditions coming in, actualism being only one of them, and this, combined with the rapid influx of chaos that happened after my Buddhist Geeks interview about this place, all together split the DhO.

It is actually more complicated than that, and there is much backstory that I don't want to get into, but I really don't think it was you, James, unless you somehow acted in ways that are totally beyond my understanding, so don't worry about it.

When the sister forums were founded, nearly all of the chaos vanished, and the whole community has been vastly healthier for it, I feel. There is still the occasional small thing, but nothing like what happened then.
Robin Woods, modified 8 Years ago.

RE: A Confession

Posts: 163 Join Date: 5/28/12 Recent Posts
Daniel M. Ingram:
The community split in the First Great DhO Schism when a number of those who founded it needed more space to do their own thing, combined with a number of other traditions coming in, actualism being only one of them, and this, combined with the rapid influx of chaos that happened after my Buddhist Geeks interview about this place, all together split the DhO.

It is actually more complicated than that, and there is much backstory that I don't want to get into, but I really don't think it was you, James, unless you somehow acted in ways that are totally beyond my understanding, so don't worry about it.

When the sister forums were founded, nearly all of the chaos vanished, and the whole community has been vastly healthier for it, I feel. There is still the occasional small thing, but nothing like what happened then.


What were the 'sister forums'? KFD and....?