Hello everyone,
Looking over Daniel's book, a couple days ago i realized i was in "Mind and Body". I tried to sense everything around me as best as i could. Then i began meditating for several hours at a time.
Over this period, i felt i achieved many insights but i will describe the most important ones. Yesterday as i was sitting, i was observing a moving bug. The bugs movements started to flicker and i realized this was impermanence. Every movement seemed like a new frame. As i continued meditating, i felt the same thing with sounds and touch. Every sensation was a new one and they happened repeatedly. I really concentrated on this and after a while the frames were "flickering" extremely fast. It was as if every time i moved my eyes, it was another view. This is my journal post when i was still in this state after i had finished my meditation.
"What the fuck is going on. Everything looks like another scene. Each moment is a another scene. Everything is moving so fast. I feel sporatic. Sounds I hear instant by instant. Each thing I notice then I notice something else. Each thing I see then I see something else. It like each thing is another sound and each sight is another view. It is all different paintings I see one after another. Touch too. When I touch myself, I feel each sensation as it moves up and down my arm. This is not as intense as the seeing or hearing but it is no longer one sensation but rather a multitude of sensations."
This feeling began to fade with sometimes seeing the frames with less intensity and sometimes not at all. Next when i went to bed i began meditating again and the same thing happened. It was mostly sound and touch. Then something really strange happened. I became very nauseas to the point of throwing up. Stuff looked and felt impermenent and i was sensing my surroundings this way but i was extremely nauseas. Today when i started meditating, the same thing happened and the more i felt one sensation after another with this nausea the more nauseas i became. It got extremely intense but then it faded and i was split into two feelings. One of pressure and one of bliss. I was mindful with the one of bliss and it felt amazing as a smile slowly and naturally came across my face. This lasted about 15 seconds and i was back to feeling pressure (not bad though) in my head. Now whenever i become increasingly mindful i feel an undercurrent of nausea and sometimes it intensifies. I would really appreciate it if someone can give me their opinion to whats happening as i haven't had much meditation practice?
One other important thing to note. Sometimes when i am meditating, i feel as if my body blends in with the space around me. its as if my body is stretching to meet the space around me and i am part of the space. It is not really the body but my "consciousness". Also, i often feel when meditating that sensations are out of my control and appear no matter what. I am more and more just sitting back and letting them occur. I think this is egolessness.
Also, when i stop meditating most things definitely decrease in intensity.
