Has anyone else ever had the experience of becoming suddenly moody after a good meditation?

I've had this experience a few times before over the years.  I always figured it was the result of trying too hard at not trying .

This wasn't the case the day before yesterday.   I was using Ajahn Brahm's meditation method.  Just sitting and doing nothing.  I used the thought of what I do when I relax a muscle that I consciously contracted, then doing that with my mind.  In other words "letting go".

I got very relaxed.  My mind was crystal clear.   I felt "sparkly", if that makes any sense.  I felt really good.

My meditation ended, I got up and I visited the bathroom.  I got on the computer after that.

I read a mildly  inflammatory and harmless message on the web before I got severely and suddenly irritated completely out of proportion by what I read.  The irritation stayed with me for a long time.  Even my sleeping that night was fitfull.

Has anyone ever had a similar experience before?

Anyone have any idea what it might have been about?

Thanks for any clues

Steve

If you're letting go, you're lowering your guard and defences.  The good feelings you were having are probably just how you are naturally without this constant check on your personality and feelings we all have.  Consider how we are as children, emotions rage, then they go away quickly.  The problem you encountered, I think, was that you noticed your irritation and decided it shouldn't be there.  This happens to me too after having some success in letting go.  I might think, "why can't I just let go of this irritation?!"  The problem is, though, that this is holding on to the emotion, not letting it go.  Next time, just realize it's fine to be irritated, and let it go when it leaves.

This could also be caused by a lack of concentration.  With good concentration, you can dismiss the hinderances (like irritation/aversion) and just forget about them.  Maybe start your meditation sessions with 10 minutes of breath counting, then try letting go and see if it's easier.  I've noticed a huge difference in my own practice recently because I did this.

This isn't always easy, though, I can relate to your situation here.   I think the main thing that helps me is realizing I don't need to "fix" myself - I don't need to work through the irritation - I can just forget the whole thing.  Later, if I come back to the thought or situation that caused the irritation, the reaction doesn't really happen a second time.  Sitting with a problem and trying to solve it just feeds it.  It's better just to get a calm bearing and then come back with a clear head.

Not Tao,

Thanks for the interesting answer.  I honesty wasn't expecting anyone to write that they had that happen to them, let along having an idea what it might be about.

I don't think it was a lack of concentration.  When I finished with the meditation my mind was very settled, nearly blank.  It was only about 10 minutes after I stopped that the blissy mood broke like glass with irritation taking its place.

In terms of your suggestion for breath watching, maybe I need to do that after my meditation is done when that happens to me again ( as well as staying away fron possibly disturbing input for a little time if I can ).

I also found what you said about children going from one emotion to the next interesting.  They DO.

I will try "letting myself be irritated" when it happens again.  Like I wrote, it stayed with me into a fitful sleep so I have nothing to lose by trying.

Again, I found your answer interesting, as it is very different from my old abandoned theory back when I used to "try" to concentrate.  I always thought I put too much force into it and used up some sort of brain chemical, which explained the grouchiness.   Sort of like if you have a good cafffeinated drink, it wears off, you feel great one minute, then you get cranky.

Like I wrote, that theory didn't fit this time around.  It is very intriguing that it might be a matter of the flood gates staying open, or maybe just being extra sensitive,after the meditation.

Thank you.

With anger related things, it is helpful to actually realize you are justified in feeling the anger.  Whatever made you irritated SEEMED like a valid reason to be irritated.  I get stuck in anxiety somtimes, and it's the same way - my anxiety seems justified, and I feel like I can trust it.  So it's a dilemma, isn't it?  We trust this emotion we're feeling, but we're also trying to get rid of it.  This can really become an endless process if we try to work everything out this way.

This is where I found I needed a "unifying philisophy" - or an across the board approach to emotional response. Buddhism actually has one built in - the brahma viharas. There are four appropriate ways to deal with any interpersonal relationship. Kindness, compassion, vicarious happiness, and equanimity. They are appropriate because they don't make you feel bad, but they still allow you to express those opinions you feel are justified.

So in the case of your irritation, by first accepting it's justified you can remove any attempt to suppress the emotion, then by transforming it into compassion, you can open yourself to the messy reality of conflicting opinions and other people's emotional baggage. I've found that it's the suppression that causes most of my anger. Once I let go of the idea that I shouldn't feel something, the negativity dies down a lot.

I hope this relates to you. I don't know the cause of your irritation, so I can only speak from my own experiences.

A&P territory to Dark Night territory: the classic pattern.

Standard, normal, even expected in some ways.

Happy New Year,

Daniel

Daniel,
Coinicidence has it that I just happened to read a review of your book on Amazon yesterday, so I have some idea of what "dark night" means.    Beyond that I don't understand your comment?   What is A&P?   Is it possible to give me a 1 - 3 liner explaining what you wrote?

Standard,normal, even expected?   If so, what is the cure?  Repeated exposure and time?

Happy New Year

Steve

I don't think that this is necessarily connected to the vipassana nanas. Here is an easier explanation:

Opening up to one thing leads to opening up to all things. This is to be expected. Listen to talks about vulnerability by Brene Brown on youtube if you need more evidence.

this happens very often.  on the aypsite.org it is reccommended to always make a slow transition between your sits and your active life.  take time after each session to simply ruminate.  it helps me.

bon chance and a greaat 2015!