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Where am I ?
Answer
1/5/15 8:13 PM
Hi Dear all, I hope you can help me to know where am I and go to keep going


For almost 9 years ago I´ve been searching to the awakeness of my inner, I opened the eyes to see the world totally different, all the concepts, the words, even the language has lost the literal meaning, I see the world like it is, some things has also changed with my body, and in this point I´m confused for many things, I would like to know if you can guide me to know where am I.


All it starts before I came to Taiwan, one number followed me everywhere, tickets, telephone number, id, in everywhere I looked, I saw the same number, I tried to search the meaning without answer, when I arrive to taiwan I saw it again, I knew someone wants to tell me something, so after few weeks finally understood the meaning, "coincidence doesn't exist by itself, it's just destiny hidden"

The number was 33 and 69 It symbolizes the human virtue of acquiring transcendental wisdom beyond the limits of the physical world and that are created by the conscious mind thru harmony. There was the answer of many questions.

During few days  I have felt changes on me, discovering the new no reality, without any physical or material ambition, many things changes, when we forget our desires, the mind starts to understand, and when we bring peace to our mind without thoughts is when the knowledge comes to us, thru this I've been seen myself, the time and space for some moments are distorted, without meaning, like if one day becomes in one second, and the space like if doesnt move, only the things around me are moving, like watching a movie, no feelings, no needs, even hungry or desires.

Something very interesting about language was the inability to recognice some words, like if I was writing something I had to stop and look for the meaning of the word, they loose the sense. 

 At night when dreaming, also being aware of the dream, memory for some reason has increased, I start to remember very detail places, that maybe before I could not remember, sense are more sensitive, but there is one thing that has happened and I dont know the meaning, for maybe three days I start to felt some pression in the middle of my chest like in the plexus solar I felt for few hours, after it become to go up to the middle of heart, and it keep moving up until my throat, since then for few moments I heard my own voice like an echo, like double voice, but I didnt want to ask to the other persons if thery heard like me, a sound like I didnt heard before. On my mouth its always with more saliva than I used to felt before. Also I have been feeling a small presion on the middle of my eyes and some times on the top of my head, when I feel the presion on the top of my head I feel also something pushing, like a big weight on my head, on my ears a very high tone all time, sharp, like the high tone of a violin.


After that I start to get more confused about life, I was in depression about giving up all my material goals, and to discover the real life and all has been hidden and we have been manipulated from many years.

For some days I felt like robot, acting without controling my body and feeling like another person was doing the phsysical things, and in my mind the dialogue was very interesting, full of wisdom and reason, like talking with another person, and in many moments during day I felt an energy coming up from me feets to all my body vibrating


For maybe one or two months ago also I have seen shimmering small dots  moving in circles and other bigger dots more transparent with two circles inside, if I focus more in that I start to see some colors in clouds like rainbow,  just for few instants, and all vibrating.  And after that some kind of tunnel with black things moving to the midle of the tunnel, a little bit difficult to explain, but I remember when I was very young I used to see that tunnel in the sky.
Also I have been noticing some of other white dots or something when some positive people is around me, like small clouds around, just for few seconds passing in front of them.

Since the other physical changes the sharp sound still there and recently in some moments I start to hear another sound like if it was a tibetan bowl, really different from the other sound.


This is in general all the "sympthons"

Thanks in advance emoticon

RE: Where am I ?
Answer
1/8/16 4:25 AM as a reply to Sebastian Rocha.
Sebastian Rocha:

After that I start to get more confused about life, I was in depression about giving up all my material goals, and to discover the real life and all has been hidden and we have been manipulated from many years.

Hello Sebastian,

I am sorry to hear that you are going through a difficult stage. Whatever you do, do rush decisions during transitory, difficult phases in your development!

I think your questions need to be answered from two points of view:
  1. The everyday-life, psychological, first teaching, virtue, morality point of view. This is probably the most important one, the one that comes first, but this forum might not be the best place to come to for advice. Friends, family, girlfriends/boyfriends, possibly a therapist are better options. But do try to get your life sorted out!
  2. The meditative point of view: I think we will need more information about your practice. What techniques you use, how frequently you practice, and so on.
Best of luck emoticon

neko

RE: Where am I ?
Answer
1/8/16 10:00 AM as a reply to Sebastian Rocha.
Sebastian Rocha:
For maybe one or two months ago also I have seen shimmering small dots  moving in circles and other bigger dots more transparent with two circles inside, if I focus more in that I start to see some colors in clouds like rainbow,  just for few instants, and all vibrating.  And after that some kind of tunnel with black things moving to the midle of the tunnel, a little bit difficult to explain, but I remember when I was very young I used to see that tunnel in the sky.  Also I have been noticing some of other white dots or something when some positive people is around me, like small clouds around, just for few seconds passing in front of them.

I found this (extremely incomplete and likely inaccurate) diagram this morning.  Maybe you're familiar with some of these and can use them as talking points.  I don't want to derail this thread or anything, but enumarating entoptic phenomenon is something I've wanted to do on here.  Here's a short list of my experieinces in that area:

- Blue dots (easy to induce when straining the eyes outside their normal range; probably not a good idea)
- Stringy and circular eye dark floaters
- White dots moving on blue sky (pretty obvious that they are live blood cells to me)
- After images from looking at bright lights, then looking aside, or closing the eyes.  The colors cycle and dissipate.
- Purkinje Tree (anyone who has been to an eye doctor can confirm this one)
- Visual snow on closed eyelids, open eyes at night.
- Normal focusing blur
- The way intent messes with binocular vision: holding eyes unfocused (cross-eyed) and then creating composites, addition/subtraction from left/right eyes.
- Going deep into bright lights while unfocused.
- Minimal light exposure to "see" a distinct scene briefly through closed eyes.
- Differences in color between the two eyes.
- Night-vision adjustment (due to holding one eye closed for about forty minutes), then experiencing that eye not being actively used and having a different brightness level than the other.
- Ability to focus at a certain distance without a visual object present.
- Persistence of vision on lights flickering above the usual level of perception (such as dragging a clock by flicking an eye around and having it stamp the time in a smear dozens of times).
- etc.

I list these to point out that none of it is important to spiritual development.  These are distractions to be understood so that they will no longer be so distacting.  Yes, it's interesting to see how the eyes work, but they work just fine without all this extra attention.