Starting at the beginning

thumbnail
Mike B, modified 8 Years ago at 9/6/15 1:33 PM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/6/15 1:33 PM

Starting at the beginning

Posts: 5 Join Date: 8/31/15 Recent Posts
I'm using my first post on Dharma Overground to start a practise log. I'm 42, live in Oxford, and I've meditated just now for the first time in months - a half hour of Just Sitting - a practise learnt from the Friends of the Western Buddhist Order (now Triratna), with whom I dabbled a few years ago.

My resolve to meditate regularly has been sporadic and almost always short-lived, to my frustration. And this despite what feels like a strong awareness of the treasures that are available to be unlocked.

The hope is that this public declaration within what looks like a friendly and open community of experienced meditators might become that extra encouragement needed to establish a regular practise.
neko, modified 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 2:27 AM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 2:27 AM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 762 Join Date: 11/26/14 Recent Posts
Mike B.:

The hope is that this public declaration within what looks like a friendly and open community of experienced meditators might become that extra encouragement needed to establish a regular practise.
Peer pressure! emoticon
thumbnail
tom moylan, modified 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 5:52 AM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 5:52 AM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 896 Join Date: 3/7/11 Recent Posts
welcome and congratulations on a strong start.  i found that in the beginning of my practice i had to force myself to sit and meditate.  after a while the practice became self-sustaining and i wish you the same.

there is some great info here and great support so log away.

tom
thumbnail
Paul Kinkade, modified 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 1:33 PM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 1:33 PM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 19 Join Date: 8/4/14 Recent Posts
I've been in the same position you are. Don't worry, you know you want it, and you'll keep starting from the beginning until it finally sticks. The simple fact that you've posted this shows that you know what you want. 

It helps to do anything physical you can do to solidify the intention instead of just letting it float around in your head. Write down your resolutions and why you're resolving them, go on a retreat, keep track of the number of days in a row you've sat, and just physically sit down and cross your legs anyway even when your mind tells you "now's not the time". 

Settle in, it's a long path, so learn to love it. 
thumbnail
Mike B, modified 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 1:56 PM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/7/15 1:56 PM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 5 Join Date: 8/31/15 Recent Posts
Hi guys, good to hear from you and thanks for the encouragement. I'll resolve to repay your efforts with effort of my own on the cushions over the next few weeks.

Neko - 'peer pressure' just might be the missing link!

Tom - thanks, and yes, if it became self-sustaining anytime soon then that would be a great place to be. For now I'll be talking myself into it every day.

Paul - all good advice, thanks. I'm keeping a detailed daily log as well as this here, and hope that will help build momentum as I can see the time invested and progress being made.

Mike
thumbnail
Mike B, modified 8 Years ago at 9/12/15 11:40 AM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/12/15 11:39 AM

SUMMARY 1

Posts: 5 Join Date: 8/31/15 Recent Posts
Days meditated - 6 out of 7
Time - 220 minutes - Just Sitting (155) Breath (40) Metta (25)

In summary: Felt very much like the first week of meditating after a long time of not doing so. Mind constantly wandering, but motivated to spot it early and refocus. Increased the length of sits to 45 minutes by the end of the period. Mind certainly calms better toward the end of longer sits. A promising first week but no breakthroughs of any kind. Lost one day to a hangover.

Learnings + Reminders: To constantly keep spotting the wandering mind, broaden awareness at that point and refocus. Having faith that by keeping on doing this, within a few weeks things should start to happen.
thumbnail
katy steger,thru11615 with thanks, modified 8 Years ago at 9/13/15 7:28 PM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/13/15 7:28 PM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 1740 Join Date: 10/1/11 Recent Posts
Neko - 'peer pressure' just might be the missing link!

Neko has a special shirt idea that says:

I'm with 
sotapanna
----> 


So you have a a good mentor in the peer pressure/co-boost department ;)


To your summary: nice. If you do 5-minute sits sincerely versus longer practice, any sincerely attentive, relaxed practice is valuable, too. It is just like 5 good slow sit-ups has an effect even if we don't want to make time for some perfect workout.
thumbnail
Mike B, modified 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 7:38 AM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 7:38 AM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 5 Join Date: 8/31/15 Recent Posts
If you do 5-minute sits sincerely versus longer practice, any sincerely attentive, relaxed practice is valuable, too. It is just like 5 good slow sit-ups has an effect even if we don't want to make time for some perfect workout.

That's a great tip, and actually I've been thinking I'd try breaking my sit up into maybe two shorter sits each with a different focus, at least whilst my ability to concentrate is building.
thumbnail
Richard Zen, modified 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 8:33 AM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 8:33 AM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 1665 Join Date: 5/18/10 Recent Posts
Mike B.:
If you do 5-minute sits sincerely versus longer practice, any sincerely attentive, relaxed practice is valuable, too. It is just like 5 good slow sit-ups has an effect even if we don't want to make time for some perfect workout.

That's a great tip, and actually I've been thinking I'd try breaking my sit up into maybe two shorter sits each with a different focus, at least whilst my ability to concentrate is building.
It's a good tip at the beginning but I would at some point just consistently stay with the breath for a long period of time as this will bring out your psychological baggage. When this happens you can psychologize it by simply challenging it's veracity or you can just continue being with the breath. The latter is good if you want to develop deeper concentration states and the former is good for just decision making in life where you challenge limiting beliefs.

It's important to relax your body and to adjust the breath for more comfort depending on how you are (deep breath for energy, and shallower breath if you have too much energy).

I would add a welcoming practice where you welcome all negative situations so that the brain has less tension over meditation preferences (or any preferences for that matter). It's also a big insight in meditation in general, and the understanding of the conditioning part of the brain. "What you resist persists" - Carl Jung.

When going deeper just avoid any heavy analysis and strategizing and return to the breath no matter what experiences happen (good or bad). You are trying to see their impermanence. If one doesn't indulge or fight with experiences they cessate on their own.

Have fun!
thumbnail
Mike B, modified 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 5:19 PM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 5:19 PM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 5 Join Date: 8/31/15 Recent Posts
Thanks Richard. Just re-reading your post after a very good mindfulness of breathing meditation where my mind wandered very little, and certainly appreciating the potential of keeping that going for longer. I seem to be fine so far at not being too attached to my mind's wanderings once I spot them, and I let go of them easily and re-focus. I'll look out for the baggage you talk about later on.

I plan on mixing things a little for the time being as I find my feet again - a little metta bhavana, some mindfulness of breathing, and some just sitting, and taking the pressure off in terms of trying to work out what is 'best' for me for the time being. It feels most important right now just to make it to the cushions each day and give it some good effort!
thumbnail
Richard Zen, modified 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 7:58 PM
Created 8 Years ago at 9/14/15 7:58 PM

RE: Starting at the beginning

Posts: 1665 Join Date: 5/18/10 Recent Posts
Mike B.:
Thanks Richard. Just re-reading your post after a very good mindfulness of breathing meditation where my mind wandered very little, and certainly appreciating the potential of keeping that going for longer. I seem to be fine so far at not being too attached to my mind's wanderings once I spot them, and I let go of them easily and re-focus. I'll look out for the baggage you talk about later on.

I plan on mixing things a little for the time being as I find my feet again - a little metta bhavana, some mindfulness of breathing, and some just sitting, and taking the pressure off in terms of trying to work out what is 'best' for me for the time being. It feels most important right now just to make it to the cushions each day and give it some good effort!
It is important to do that repetition day in and day out but I can give you some extra pointers to save you some time.

Be careful when you say "good effort". A lot of this effort is too much effort (a fight or flight response). Since preferences and a lack of welcoming unpleasant experiences is a root cause of dukkha, then meditation sessions that aren't to your preference will also irritate. It's more about hanging in there as the impulses arise and pass away. If the mind is wandering and you finally are aware of it then there will be no need to push or pull to get back, because you are already back. The impulses cessate on their own if you just watch them and not indulge or fight with them.

To me from what I've gauged from many people who've dabbled in meditation and it didn't stick is that when they got good at concentration and got off the cushion they often complained that their habits hadn't changed. The cure for this is to use your consistency of awareness to do activities one at a time with as little futurizing or past reminicing as possible. This will get you into a flow state and will make your days much, much better. That "hanging in there" and continuing awareness of the breath while in daily life and using it to let go of temptations and to let go of stress is extremely practical. It's the attitude to treat it like a game (as Daniel puts it in his book) and pursue your wordly goals with the same consistent, gapless, return to the breath ASAP attitude.

It's fun precisely because when you are about your day it's like "I'm just going to enjoy this breath regardless of what happens today." Welcoming helps to smooth out the difficult aversions that appear in a regular day or even a tough day but during most days you can see a momentum where there is little idleness and you're powered by a rocketship of inertia moving from task to task. Ruminating over future or past is like wind-drag.

It may sound out there but I assure you after years of daily life practice it gets that much better.

Have fun and experiment but don't just leave it on the mat, because the new conditioning you'll gain will only be on the mat.

Breadcrumb