re:
Laurel Carrington (5/11/16 12:23 AM as a reply to shargrol)
"Ignorance + misogyny + incomprehensible nonsense aplenty in this brief thread. How about regarding the female half of the species as human…"Seconding this (and
Noah's note -- 5/11/16 1:16). AND remember that these days the issue of "lust" is by no means limited to men towards women, nor vice-versa.
re:
Chris Chris Chris (5/11/16 12:52 AM as a reply to LaurelCarrington)
"
That's not proven method of celibacy. Please stay on the topic."
Worth trying (dictating to the other posters), but this is a
discussion forum.
But
apropos the topic: Check-out the method described by Thanissaro Bhikkhu, found throughout his teachings, but perhaps most accessibly, and in terms of his own experience, in an interview in "
Oberlin Alumni Magazine :: Spring 2004; Feature: Being A Monk" (available on-line at:
http://www.oberlin.edu/alummag/spring2004/feat_monk.html) See the frame "page 4", about 2/3 down the 1st page there.
Admittedly a special case, as he's devoted his life to
dhamma and renunciation, but he is also a Westerner (and in fact interesting this whole interview, as very much a chat among old college buddies). But he described a "proven method", he's credible, and what he describes is quite pragmatic.
Actually, here's the relevant part of the interview, to save the trouble of searching for it (though the whole thing is quite interesting as revealing personal aspects of being a monk):
Q: Did it take a long time to adjust to a celibate lifestyle?
A: The first hurdle you face is not wanting to take care of it, the attractiveness of lust itself. But after a while I began to realize that I was suffering because of this. But if I focused on the lust itself, rather than the object of the lust, I began to realize lust was not that good a thing to have in my mind.
Q: Do you ever feel lustful?
A: No.
Q: Never?
A: You have meditation to take care of it. As soon as lust comes into the mind, you've got to take care of it.
Q: You sound so pragmatic.
A: It's very pragmatic. That was one of the lessons I got from Ajaan Fuang: Get over the drama and sit down and do the work. I remember the first time he said to me, "Okay, we're going to meditate all night." I said, "My God, I can't do that! I've been working hard all day!" He said, "Is it going to kill you?" No. "Then you can do it."
Q: What about the simple desire for touch? Can non-monks touch you?
A: Women can't. With men, it depends on how they're going to touch me. No lustful touching.