Metta tips ?

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Stick Man, modified 7 Years ago at 3/6/17 3:01 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 3/6/17 3:01 PM

Metta tips ?

Posts: 396 Join Date: 9/23/14 Recent Posts
Going to start a metta practice (I plop this into ye magicke categorye ), got any tips ?
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tom moylan, modified 7 Years ago at 3/6/17 3:27 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 3/6/17 3:27 PM

RE: Metta tips ?

Posts: 896 Join Date: 3/7/11 Recent Posts
start with the personality you most cherish in the world or already out of it.

focus on the feelings of love, soak in those, soak some more.

apply those feelings to those you like, then those you like less, find your compassion for them and turn that compassion toward that same deep love as before, soak in that feeling.

apply those same feelings to someone you actively dislike until.   think of them as innocent children who have been damaged and who can only be healed by your love, even if they are undeserving.  soak in that until it is true.  work past your resistance as that is all that is standing in the way.

apply all of the aforementioned to yourself, your inner child, your damage.  forgive everyone and then yourself.

soak in that love until it is all there is.

rinse and repeat and take your time.  its a muscle that needs excercise.
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Stick Man, modified 7 Years ago at 3/7/17 3:15 AM
Created 7 Years ago at 3/7/17 3:03 AM

RE: Metta tips ?

Posts: 396 Join Date: 9/23/14 Recent Posts
tom moylan:
start with the personality you most cherish in the world or already out of it.

focus on the feelings of love, soak in those, soak some more.

apply those feelings to those you like, then those you like less, find your compassion for them and turn that compassion toward that same deep love as before, soak in that feeling.

apply those same feelings to someone you actively dislike until.   think of them as innocent children who have been damaged and who can only be healed by your love, even if they are undeserving.  soak in that until it is true.  work past your resistance as that is all that is standing in the way.

apply all of the aforementioned to yourself, your inner child, your damage.  forgive everyone and then yourself.

soak in that love until it is all there is.

rinse and repeat and take your time.  its a muscle that needs excercise.

I tried just tuning into someone and found that what I get is a kaleidoscope of other people that I really like thinking about - monkey mind, hard to maintain one meditation object. So should I think of a person as a meditation object, as I tend to do ? Thing about people is they have all these different qualities to look at, they're not simple like breath or a candle, they're as complicated as you are.
I'm used to jhana meditation in which I try to avoid thoughts of anyone else, and place myself in a good feeling, or an state of equanimity, and just let that carry over into how I regard people - and the rest can sort itself out based on how my state is after practice.
If your intention is to alter someone else's life rather than you're own, then you're doing something like energy work or prayer. But I think metta is about your own attitudes and how you relate to others, rather than someone else's life, would you agree ?
I found that when tuning in to someone I aim to go into my heart/chest, or am drawn there. I feel what I feel about them in there, aspects of what I know about them arise, like I open myself inside as a container of my perceptions of them. I get thoughts and acceptance of their beauty and mortality - and that's pretty cool.
I'm someone who can easily be laying in bed and spontaneously shout profanities when I think of someone I don't like or who has treated me badly, and that's just when I'm under little stress. So some of this practice might be interesting but I don't know if I can even be bothered to try on people I'm averse to yet because I might stress myself too much. But for people I like it might work well, and as a starting point.

What do you think of Sam Harris's metta style here ?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2tEQPNG198
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Don Merchant, modified 7 Years ago at 3/11/17 12:57 AM
Created 7 Years ago at 3/11/17 12:56 AM

RE: Metta tips ?

Posts: 202 Join Date: 6/9/15 Recent Posts
Stick Man,
Indeed, metta meditation does seem to be better when the object is someone that you have good thoughts about, when starting this kind of practice. After awhile though, it should be possible to move to those you are 'averse' to in life. Just don't start with someone you would like to scream expletives at emoticon because the aversion is that strong. In time, it should be possible to move through the entire world population with metta. Practice makes perfect, they say.