Numbness or dullness after meditation

Ankur Singh, modified 6 Years ago at 4/26/17 9:05 PM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/26/17 9:04 PM

Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 5 Join Date: 4/25/17 Recent Posts
Hello,

I am new here. Brief Introduction about myself, I am from India but live in sydney. I have started doing mindfulness meditaton from Jan 2017. I was doing half an hour daily 5 or 6 days a week. foucsing on breath and becoming aware of the sensations and thoughts and letting them go. After a month I started having involuntary jerks or body movements during meditation and later on lots of emotions started coming to the surface during the day. It was very overwhelming. And i also suffer from panic and anxiety since last 10 yrs and dont take any medication. I stopped meditation for one month and got busy in work. But i developed some sleeping problems so i started meditating again a month back. This time I was doing 10 to 15 mins daily for 4 or 5 days a week. Involuntary body movements came down as well.

Last week I experienced dullness or numbness after mediation. It felt like inner voice or mind was very far away. Although felt pleasant sometimes. It was like ego was gone. Both feelings were there little fear and calmness. But I am little apprehensive about doing mediation again as since last 4 days , I have stopped it.
Inner voice is back but its jumping around and looking for ""what ifs"".

Any advice or suggestion would be appreciated.
Regards
Ankur
Causes & Conditions, modified 6 Years ago at 4/26/17 10:07 PM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/26/17 10:07 PM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 48 Join Date: 2/27/15 Recent Posts
Hey! I have had these kinds of experiences while meditating. They are fairly common and not necessarily something to worry about. But they do illustrate a truth about meditation that is well known on this forum but is not necessarily common knowledge anywhere else: meditation is NOT a linear path toward happiness. Meditators can and do experience all sorts of challenging experiences. AND the very purpose of mindfulness meditation is to understand three rather painful truths: life is transitory, life is painful and our sense of an inner doer or "self" is a misconception about how our minds work.

This is not to say that meditation isn't worth doing or that it isn't incredibly beneficial and enjoyable. But it can also bring up difficult physical and emotional experiences. 

As far as the shaking goes. It happens. It happens to me. And I'm sure countless others. Why does it happen? I don't think anyone knows that one quite yet.

For extra credit check out: Mastering the core teaching of the Buddha by Daniel Ingram (the founder of this site actually) and the work of Willoughby Britton, a neuroscientist who researches challenging experiences in meditation. 

Happy meditating!
Causes & Conditions, modified 6 Years ago at 4/26/17 10:10 PM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/26/17 10:10 PM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 48 Join Date: 2/27/15 Recent Posts
One trick. If your body starts moving, just observe the sensations that make up the feeling of the movement. That can sometimes sort of diffuse them. Though it's not a magic bullet and sometimes might have the opposite effect.
Ankur Singh, modified 6 Years ago at 4/27/17 6:58 AM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/27/17 6:58 AM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 5 Join Date: 4/25/17 Recent Posts
Hi,

Thanks for the replies. The numbness and empty feeling is there. My mind is searching to regain control. 
I can feel that. And i have a strange feeling how mind is working when its empty and inner voice seems to be very far or missing.
And little forgetfulness is there
I have suffered from panic and anxiety all these years. May be my  mind finding it difficult to handle the peace.

Its a mixed feeling of calmness and fear. And little worried to start meditating again. Fearing mental state will be gone. 
I am trying to accept this fear and let it go. I think my kundalini got activated when i started meditating thats why jerks or sensation in the spine. 
Although i didnt do any specific kundalini yoga or meditation just normal mindfulness meditation for panic and anxiety.

Anyways i really want to start meditating again but looking for reassurance.

Regards
Ankur 
Ankur Singh, modified 6 Years ago at 4/27/17 7:34 AM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/27/17 7:34 AM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 5 Join Date: 4/25/17 Recent Posts
Hi,

Thanks for the replies. The numbness and empty feeling is there. My mind is searching to regain control. 
I can feel that. And i have a strange feeling how mind is working when its empty and inner voice seems to be very far or missing.
And little forgetfulness is there
I have suffered from panic and anxiety all these years. May be my  mind finding it difficult to handle the peace.

Its a mixed feeling of calmness and fear. And little worried to start meditating again. Fearing mental state will be gone. 
I am trying to accept this fear and let it go. I think my kundalini got activated when i started meditating thats why jerks or sensation in the spine. 
Although i didnt do any specific kundalini yoga or meditation just normal mindfulness meditation for panic and anxiety.

Anyways i really want to start meditating again but looking for reassurance.

Regards
Ankur 
world inside, modified 6 Years ago at 4/27/17 2:14 PM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/27/17 1:41 PM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 15 Join Date: 6/4/13 Recent Posts
I recently have been through a phase like this & almost been meditating 3-5 hours a day atleast for the past 2-3 months. Uncovered a lot of little tips and tricks and have been helped by numerous volunteers of dhamma. Lets see if some of my experience can help here:

Ankur Singh
The numbness and empty feeling is there. My mind is searching to regain control. I can feel that. And i have a strange feeling how mind is working when its empty and inner voice seems to be very far or missing. And little forgetfulness is there I have suffered from
panic and anxiety all these years. May be my  mind finding it difficult to handle the peace


- The numbness of the empty "feeling" in itself suggest a "thought attack" as I call it. Some people call it a corruption in equanimity (EQ).

Ankur Singh
My mind is searching to regain control.

 - The goal of meditation to me is to ensure that nothing remains in an un-conscious or a sub-conscious state. The automation component should be completely shut-off in your system & everything should on manual control. Manual Control = Liberation to me. If mind is doing that without your knowledge/consent - there it is (NOT ME, NOT ME, NOT ME). Coming on its own, doing its own things and passing away. This is a great object for observation. The more closely you observe it, the sooner you would get back to Equanimity. Which though is not a joyful state but a great place to be in. It’s a land wherein you realize when the times are happy and when they are 'not', you know nothing lasts forever. 

Ankur Singh
"I can feel that. And i have a strange feeling how mind is working when its empty and inner voice seems to be very far or missing. And little forgetfulness is there I have suffered from panic and anxiety all these years. May be my mind finding it difficult to handle the peace"

- I'm almost close to certain, from my experience, this is what they call uprootment of impurities. I decided to stop using the term: dark night as its misleading to me (terms is too serious & unique, wherein I keep cycling throughout, maybe my limitation) & some of my past experiences. If you read MCTB, you'll learn more.
- In simple terms to me its like - when you stop reacting and stay equanimous & focused mind calms down. Hence, some thought/reaction from the past comes to surface. Even when you are not doing meditation & you get a moment of success/happiness/etc, your mind immediately likes to remember something from the past which not quite peaceful. This is the true nature of mind, which automatically brings backlog from the past up to surface when things on the foreground are calm.

Ankur Singh
"Its a mixed feeling of calmness and fear. And little worried to start meditating again. Fearing mental state will be gone. I am trying to accept this fear and let it go. I think my kundalini got activated when i started meditating thats why jerks or sensation in the spine. Although i didnt do any specific kundalini yoga or meditation just normal mindfulness meditation for panic and anxiety. Anyways i really want to start meditating again but looking for reassurance"

- Whether you like it or not my friend. You've entered the path; the great tunnel of dhamma now. Going back is possible but something in you would not let you, telling you that that the best/wisest choice is to sail through. Most people here decide to turn on all engines, even though initially they show some backing-off symptoms. I'd suggest read MCTB if you've not. Do you have any formal training into this? Do you have preferences towards noting vs. body scanning, etc. This would help plan your path forward on this exciting journey.
Ankur Singh, modified 6 Years ago at 4/28/17 5:33 AM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/28/17 5:33 AM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 5 Join Date: 4/25/17 Recent Posts
Hi,

Thanks for the relevant information. I haven't read MCTB, how do i get the information about it.
I have been doing mindfulness meditation i.e. observing the thoughts and sensation and breath being the focus point.
I think I need to go through the information regarding challenges or stages in meditation. I will be starting meditating again from tomorrow after 5 days break. 
Please help me in finding information abt MCTB. 
I will keep updating abt my experiences.

Thanks for the help.
Regards
Ankur
world inside, modified 6 Years ago at 4/28/17 8:15 AM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/28/17 7:30 AM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 15 Join Date: 6/4/13 Recent Posts
Ankur Singh
I haven't read MCTB, how do i get the information about it

Take a look at the e-books section of this forum:
https://www.dharmaoverground.org/dharma-wiki/-/wiki/Main/MCTB+

I have been doing mindfulness meditation i.e. observing the thoughts and sensation and breath being the focus point.

I'm not an expert by any means, however (as mentioned even in the MCTB about the pillars required for meditation) feel robust technique is a crucial component along with access concentration, faith & right amount of energy in practise. There are some practise logs on the forum which details the preciseness of practise. Hence decide what works for you the best. Figuring it out all by yourself is going to be difficult but if that is the only option available, other aveneues of seeking help without taking a time-off of some sort might also be available in/around your area. Some of us here practise the 'noting' technique primarily while some do the 'body scanning' technique. Though at some point, I've been forced to believe that, these are simply different types of starters to the same engine/car. But getting a good start matters to me.


Ankur Singh
I think my kundalini got activated when i started meditating thats why jerks or sensation in the spine.

Missed out on my previous reply: about kundalini and jerks. My take on that is that, this happens from time to time during practise. In your spare time, search on youtube for the 10 Day Vipassana Course Discourses by S. N. Goenka. I'm not totally sure whether its the videos for 'day' 6,7, 8 or 9 but somewhere Mr. Goenka mentions his experience when he was a student of the great teacher Saya Gyi U Ba Khin & they had seen someone with shaking so strong that he would get displaced/lifted several feet (even 5-6 feet high) apart/away/high. Novice students even believed that this particular student was under possession of some spirit/etc emoticon. But in the end, it went away too with the person (student) feeling much lighter at the end of the course. Guess Kundalini is one explaination however when I personally look into it closely without trying to name/term it - feel its simply the energy locked into one of the major nerve centers (which most people call chakras) due to blockages. Once bloackages are suddenly but partially removed, jerks and movements are experienced. Maybe you're old enough and have driven a car with carburetors. Especially when the jet used to be half filled with carbon/dirt/etc. misfiring (anxiety) & jerks used to be common.

All the best!
Ankur Singh, modified 6 Years ago at 4/29/17 9:49 PM
Created 6 Years ago at 4/29/17 9:49 PM

RE: Numbness or dullness after meditation

Posts: 5 Join Date: 4/25/17 Recent Posts
Hi, I appreciate for the guidance and information. I am still apprehensive to start the meditation practice again or not. Since last 1 day I am feeling much better and I think I am in the dilemma. Anyways I like to watch how I feel in the next couple of days. Will keep updated. Ankur

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