Brandon W Practice Log #2 - Discussion
I read your old thread and this one.
You seem very unstable. Your personality seems like it's fidgeting a lot.
If you are having psychological difficulties please consider seeking professional help. Therapy and meditation (also certain medication) can work well together.
In case you have only read books in the past and not actually meditated until your DhO logs then I feel you might benefit from Backing Off from
attainment seeking urge, away from POI and focus on something else instead;
I think you first need to make peace with the actual moment by moment and Calming the entire body with each inbreathing and each outbreathing.
Commit to this practice active of Calm-abiding in the present moment for 6 months of daily practice. 45 minutes is good in case you are psychologically stable. If not stable than 7-10 minutes spread through the day is better (but also seek professional help if this the case)
Calm-abiding Shamatha is simple yet profound.
"I know I'm breathing in calming the whole body, I know I'm breathing out calming the whole body".
This is the practice. Thoughts come and go, feelings come and go you just recognize and come back to your primary practice. THIS Moment is your Home
Nothing to attain, nowhere to go. Just this in or outbreathing and calming the WHOLE body with breathing.
Best wishes to you.
You seem very unstable. Your personality seems like it's fidgeting a lot.
If you are having psychological difficulties please consider seeking professional help. Therapy and meditation (also certain medication) can work well together.
In case you have only read books in the past and not actually meditated until your DhO logs then I feel you might benefit from Backing Off from
attainment seeking urge, away from POI and focus on something else instead;
I think you first need to make peace with the actual moment by moment and Calming the entire body with each inbreathing and each outbreathing.
Commit to this practice active of Calm-abiding in the present moment for 6 months of daily practice. 45 minutes is good in case you are psychologically stable. If not stable than 7-10 minutes spread through the day is better (but also seek professional help if this the case)
Calm-abiding Shamatha is simple yet profound.
"I know I'm breathing in calming the whole body, I know I'm breathing out calming the whole body".
This is the practice. Thoughts come and go, feelings come and go you just recognize and come back to your primary practice. THIS Moment is your Home
Nothing to attain, nowhere to go. Just this in or outbreathing and calming the WHOLE body with breathing. Best wishes to you.
MY advice :
Stick to one practice and do it daily but dont overdo it . Set a clear goal but dont be too much future oriented. If you feel any disturbances consult a doctor or therapist . They would help a lot. As Papa Che said do calm abiding meditation. If youre worried about your practice you can see posts about teachers who can help with your practice. Life is hard as it is and always be kind to yourself Lastly I will quote Daniel :
Stick to one practice and do it daily but dont overdo it . Set a clear goal but dont be too much future oriented. If you feel any disturbances consult a doctor or therapist . They would help a lot. As Papa Che said do calm abiding meditation. If youre worried about your practice you can see posts about teachers who can help with your practice. Life is hard as it is and always be kind to yourself
Lastly I will quote Daniel :For instance, we could wish to become awakened. This is a purely future-oriented goal. We could also wish to understand the true nature of the sensations that make up our world so clearly that we become awakened. This adds a present component and makes the whole enterprise much more reasonable and workable. We could simply wish to understand deeply the true nature of the sensations that make up our world as they naturally arise and vanish in that practice session or throughout that day. This is a very immediate and present-oriented goal, and a very fine one indeed. It is also method-oriented rather than result-oriented. This is the mark of a good goal.
Similarly, we could try to be kind, honest, or generous that hour or that day, try to appreciate interdependence that day, or try to stay very concentrated on some object for that practice session. These present and method-oriented goals are the foundation upon which great practice is based. Purely future-oriented goals are at best mostly worthless and at worst very dangerous.
Wishing to become awakened or more awakened is only helpful if it leads us to live in the present as it is. The same goes for training in morality and concentration, as articulated in Part One. An old dharma friend of mine once forgot these basic rules of goal-oriented practice and strived with great energy for months to attain a goal that had nothing to do with the reality that he was experiencing at that time. The results were disastrous, and decades later the dark consequences of his error ring on, the best consequence of which was providing a striking example of why purely future-oriented practice is a terrible idea. Don’t get burned by the shadow side of goal-oriented practice. Avoid competition and comparing your practice to others. Stay present-oriented whenever possible, and always avoid purely future-oriented or results-oriented goals!
Similarly, we could try to be kind, honest, or generous that hour or that day, try to appreciate interdependence that day, or try to stay very concentrated on some object for that practice session. These present and method-oriented goals are the foundation upon which great practice is based. Purely future-oriented goals are at best mostly worthless and at worst very dangerous.
Wishing to become awakened or more awakened is only helpful if it leads us to live in the present as it is. The same goes for training in morality and concentration, as articulated in Part One. An old dharma friend of mine once forgot these basic rules of goal-oriented practice and strived with great energy for months to attain a goal that had nothing to do with the reality that he was experiencing at that time. The results were disastrous, and decades later the dark consequences of his error ring on, the best consequence of which was providing a striking example of why purely future-oriented practice is a terrible idea. Don’t get burned by the shadow side of goal-oriented practice. Avoid competition and comparing your practice to others. Stay present-oriented whenever possible, and always avoid purely future-oriented or results-oriented goals!
Brandon Whited
I started the last log because I wanted to be enlightened. But I don't even know what the hell that is, what the hell that means.
I started the last log because I wanted to be enlightened. But I don't even know what the hell that is, what the hell that means.
Good, that is a sign of increasing spiritual maturity!
Right now I'm still very cerebral... I've neglected sensory clarity my entire life...
We all do that. Good that you recognize it and intend to do something about it.
For 120 days I'll put my best god forsaken foot foward towards doing whatever the hell practice I'm doing.
That's all any of us are doing.
