As a formal introdution: I understand nothing - Discussion
As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Sarah Li, modificat fa 7 mesos at 24/09/23 08:44
Created 7 mesos ago at 23/09/23 15:39
As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 4 Data d'incorporació: 31/05/23 Publicacions recents
Since my first (slightly controversial) post I learned enough and made enough progress to give me enough confidence to come back. When I asked if someone can reproduce the unusual experience I had given the instructions, I assumed that most experienced meditators can just sit down and do it. However, after reading and understanding more, I now think that I naturally have unusual strong concentration skills and they get better so fast that I am surprised at what is possible week by week. But for now, let's start at the beginning.
As a teenager I vaguely knew what meditation is, but had no good instruction and didn't practice. At one point I found out that I can pay attention to things in the periphery of my vision, and further that I can relax my attention such that the senses flow in me with reduced filters. I then made this my meditation, practicing while sitting in the bus or walking. It seems to work better when the world is moving or when there are several frames of reference. At one point I sat down at the slope of a small hill. I did this unfocused meditation I discovered, eyes open, relaxed and enjoyed the sunny day.
Then there is a gap and I don't know how long it lasted. Reality reappeared, building up step by step with colors, identifying bushes and the sky, time and knowing that I am a person with memories and the narrative of a life. I was flooded with immense gratitude for being placed in this world, in this body. Coming from a realm of timeless perfection into this fun and messy thing called life. Then I stood up and went home. By the time I didn't think much about that experience. It was just an odd thing that happened.
Around the same age I developed some health problems, with extreme pain in all joints and tiredness that often made me sleep 12 hours a day which also caused depression. I felt dissociated from reality and my body.
To make it short, let's say I had my fair share of suffering and I wanted it to end. I managed to get better and started to work on my self to improve the quality of life. Therapy and psychedelics helped me overcome depression. But I also learned that being close to normal again doesn't make me happy.
Somewhere along the line I took up meditation on an irregular basis, first with guided meditations, then based on The Mind Illuminated. It wasn't until earlier this year where I spend a week sick at home that I got serious about it. Not knowing what to do I decided to spend my time doing mostly that. My main motivation was to be more awake in daily life and maybe more often lucid in my dreams.
After a few months of regular practice (on average 1 to 2 hours a day) I learned about jhanas and somehow managed to access the first and second one. Later I had an experience where, after a short but intense jhana meditation with (what I now can identify as) a few seconds in the 4th, I felt profound and clear. I went for a walk and was crying out of joy and gratitude. I saw that these seemingly obscure teachings actually work, and the work exactly as described.
For a few days my perception was precise, clear and nature looked just beautiful. Following that I had some days where I felt irritable, afraid, annoyed and done with the world. By the time I was reading MTCB, but didn't want to analyze those days as stages of insight, because having some shitty days wasn't exactly a new phenomena for me.
Inspired by the previous experience, I decided that I will spend my next holidays doing an at home half-retreat with Rob Burbeas jhana retreat lectures. It worked quite well and I managed to access the first two jhanas again, maybe also the third, but that totally changed when I decided to meditate on 100 µgs of LSD. A few hours in, I went through the jhanas one by one until I was thrust into total nothingness and spit back out. I was totally changed - which is to say: I was totally myself, where I wasn't before. It was as if I always had a delay between reality and me and that was gone. The clarity faded as the drug faded, but the ability to access the 8 jhanas remained. I was fascinated and practiced them daily. During those two amazing weeks I also discovered what seems like other states that i can't fit into the usual categories, which led me to write that initial post.
Since then I also gained the ability to take any concept or emotion as meditation object and get absorb into it, being able to modulate it in the axis of absorption, intensity and frequency. I explored many pleasant emotions until I learned that they only satisfy temporarily. So exploring the possibilities became more interesting than the states themselves. I also learned to go into, what in my understanding is, the (Kenneth Folk style) pure land jhanas. I think I can get cessations occasionally, but they are nothing like the first experience I described from years ago and are quite subtle, so I'm not sure. I also often wake up in the middle of the night in some state of absorption. Sometimes jhanas, sometimes things I can't name. This usually is a good starting point for a nightly meditation in bed.
Another line of development is my metaphysical thinking. For a long time I disliked philosophy, as it seemed to me like it's just people who try to calculate using words. But about six years ago, as I was working on a project for university, late at night with too much caffeine, I was listening to some recordings of lectures and interviews and suddenly realized how the multiverse is structured, how it arises from nothing and how time is an illusion. It was so utterly obviously true that I had no chance of getting rid of it. It took me months to integrate that understanding, but it also seemed totally banal and useless to me. Rather, it felt like knowing the answer took the fun out of the puzzle, so I never talked to anyone about it (yes, I'm an introvert). But my understanding deepened with more and more science I absorbed. With access to jhanas, my thinking also changed and became better at meta-reasoning. Meta-reasoning in turn caused a cascade of insights. I found parallels to Buddhist metaphysics, but didn't realize how deep they go until recently.
Anyway, this deep understanding of reality became my map for practice, and it went both ways. I was thinking: I understand this in theory, but not experientially, let's go look for it. Or, I have this experience, how can it be integrated into my understanding?
During one meditation I observed the 6th jhana closely. By turning the 5th back on itself (the infinite in the distance is also the observer, the center) one creates a loop, a recursion. By removing everything else what is not the recursion one arrives at pure "consciousness". But that recursion is empty (there is only one recursive set, which is the empty set). By seeing through the emptiness of consciousness one arrives at nothingness (7th). That was quite a revelation to experience directly and understanding it at the same time. Coming out of the 8th, I intended to go into cessation. I relax and got deeper into meditation. Thought and some part of perception slowed down for a moment, then came back. I try it several time but can't get any further. I noticed that I still had the intention to observe and experience what will happen, which brought me out of the state each time. As I tried to let go of it I realized that it is because I cling to existence and I cling to existence because I have several unfulfilled goals. I struggled to let go of them, one by one, as I wanted to let go of the need to exist, it seemed that I am peeling out of myself, like a snake out of it's skin, but I shed so many layers that nothing remained. It was like a twist in more than three dimensions and after I untwisted, there was stillness something changed and I felt a great peace, like a knot being undone. I then continued to meditate until the doorbell rang. The rest of the day I was in a constant high concentration state, full of energy, clarity and equanimity. I was hiking and when I stood in the ruin of a castle, I looked into the distant valley. In the distance I saw myself, in myself I saw emptiness, in emptiness I saw everything, and felt deep love for everything and everyone.
The next day I was listening to a conversation with Pernille Damore and Angelo DiLullo over the 10 fetters. I realized that I understood what they where talking about up to the 8th fetter. And when she said that this is something she usually doesn't tell people because it could scare them and him saying the sentence "There is no where for anything to hide.", it clicked and I realized that my metaphysical inquiry perfectly explains the experience one has on the way to enlightenment, because this is how things really are. It was like pulling a zipper where the two sides perfectly interlock. At that point I started laughing, and later I cried for the beauty of it. It was the day before that I understood the point of the 6th, 7th and 8th fetter, but I also saw that I didn't understood the 9th and 10th yet (as they describe it). I was restless, chasing and I wanted to know everything. But then looking at my understanding of reality it occurred to me that, since all moments already exist, there is no need in avoiding or chasing any moments, they all happen anyway. And then I understood that I will only ever know my subjective experience, never anything else but this single place in the world, from this angle, moment by moment. I looked trough my eyes into the world and thought, this is everything I will ever experience, but that's okay.
The next weekend, after metta mediation, I had a profound experience of love for all the world, but most importantly, I also learned to love myself - which was always hard for me before. A few days later during my evening sit, I managed to reproduce the experience I described at the beginning. But this time I could notice it much more precisely. Shutting down, it felt like individual moments stretch in time with less and less going on in the mind, then there is a discontinuity and the mind comes back up again, but more gradual, like an old light bulb heating up. Then there is a wonderful feeling of utter peace and relaxation. Not being sure what that was, I let my self fall again which resulted in exactly the same experience. Afterwards I took the afterglow as meditation object and intensified it for a minute or so. The feeling stayed with me until I went to bed and was present the next day in weaker form. I had to work and talk to people, but all I wanted to do the whole day is sit in quite and solitude and enjoy the peace.
The weekend after that (three days ago, as of writing), I experimented with shamata without an object (as Michael Taft calls it), but other then usually, I added my practice of taking in all the senses in an unfiltered way. I reached a deep state where it seems like I'm hollow and all sense impressions just flow through me without being taken up. The afterglow was interesting as every sensory event seemed separate and also beautiful. Like a painting made form glitter - every pixel pretty on it's own and only with enough distance they seem to form a gestalt.
The next day I tried again, but then also inquired into the sense of an observer. I couldn't make sense of why the observer is so persistent, I didn't understand what it is and why it feels like a center to experience, when actually my mind consists of the interaction of thoughts and sense data. Since I looked through the experience of consciousness before, this is something else. I tried to understand the observer, not by looking at it as usual, but by looking past it. In my theory, I explain the sense of having a unified experience exists, because there is a mathematical object with approximates the collection of nerve pulses, neurotransmitters and (maybe) electromagnetic fields. While the elements are disjoint and happen inside a universe, the mathematical object which approximates this collection feels like it is a unified whole. From this I realized that the object has no influence on the universe at all. There could even be an infinite number of similar objects, each with the feeling of being me, but non of them can influence the universe - which will unfold the way it does anyway. I thought, in this case, I can just let go of that feeling. Whether or not this explanation is true, it helped me. I let go of being me, relaxed and dissolved into reality. With that, the center of experience was gone. I was no longer experiencing information traveling to me to be perceived. When I perceive them, they are already there, there is no distance, and in such, it is as if I perceive them where they happen. Either way, there is no difference, it doesn't matter. The constriction around myself was gone. I observed reality like this for a while. It felt utterly normal, but also light, thin and somehow unimpeded, like the curvature of space time flattened out and everything is traveling in a straight line. It was also a bit disorienting, like trying to balance in thin air without any point of reference, as if up and down lost their meaning - but in a pleasant way. It felt so obviously mundane that I tried to remember how it is to be a constricted center. I managed to bring it back but then though "Nope, don't want." and relaxed it again. This happened about two weeks ago. I feel so different in a way that's hard to describe. There is an ever present okayness with what ever is going on. Zero distance to reality and no need to think how reality could be otherwise. I'm not happy all the time and also have moments where I fall back into old patterns of thinking. But whenever I notice there is constricting, I just relax again.
I haven't told this to anyone so far and I don't think the people I know would understand.
I wanted to quit my job for some time now to do something useful instead. Now I'm no longer afraid and I know what I want to do.
Above, I mentioned a metaphysical theory to explain this experience. I'm sure that it will be possible to proof this formally, but until then I can give you a very very short summary here. For the normal ear this would sound totally absurd at first, but I think in this place many may nod their head.
Angelo DiLullo summed up this intuitive understanding in one sentence:
"There is no exact way things actually are."
Now, I think it is possible to explain how there is no exact way things actually are and that a full explanation of this will be able to function as a guide for other as it did for me. Here is a very very short summary of what will be the first chapter to my unwritten book (or series of blog posts or whatever):
There is no true reality. No thing is fundamental. Every thing can be deconstructed into smaller parts until pure emptiness is reached. Nothing exists, which is the same as everything exists. All a thing is, is a perspective on nothingness. A perspective is a definition by constraints (symmetry breaking operations). Every perspective can be further split up into new perspectives by adding constraints. This includes numbers, mathematical objects, universes, moments within the universe and more. Thereby all perspectives are related in a structure that includes everything and has its root in nothingness. We can only understand a part of this structure, the (infinite) rest is absolutely incomprehensible. In some part of this structure (call it multiverse) it is so that the number of constraints that can be added to a perspective is much larger than the ways the perspective can be described. This imbalance gives rise to a direction. The before can be known, the after can not be known. This creates the illusion of time. In the structure of the universe every moment exists outside of time and every possible timeline also exists. The reason the world is the way you experience it, is just because it is a possible perspective on nothingness. The consensus between the disjoint parts of some portion of the structure - i.e. your body in this universe - gives rise to the impression of an unified experience.
I think the most amazing thing is that, while I had to use far out ideas from the foundation of mathematics, the multiverse interpretation of quantum mechanics and the free energy principle to arrive at this description, some people, more than 2000 years ago - not even knowing how to write - where able to gain a deep intuitive understanding of this by just paying attention carefully.
As a teenager I vaguely knew what meditation is, but had no good instruction and didn't practice. At one point I found out that I can pay attention to things in the periphery of my vision, and further that I can relax my attention such that the senses flow in me with reduced filters. I then made this my meditation, practicing while sitting in the bus or walking. It seems to work better when the world is moving or when there are several frames of reference. At one point I sat down at the slope of a small hill. I did this unfocused meditation I discovered, eyes open, relaxed and enjoyed the sunny day.
Then there is a gap and I don't know how long it lasted. Reality reappeared, building up step by step with colors, identifying bushes and the sky, time and knowing that I am a person with memories and the narrative of a life. I was flooded with immense gratitude for being placed in this world, in this body. Coming from a realm of timeless perfection into this fun and messy thing called life. Then I stood up and went home. By the time I didn't think much about that experience. It was just an odd thing that happened.
Around the same age I developed some health problems, with extreme pain in all joints and tiredness that often made me sleep 12 hours a day which also caused depression. I felt dissociated from reality and my body.
To make it short, let's say I had my fair share of suffering and I wanted it to end. I managed to get better and started to work on my self to improve the quality of life. Therapy and psychedelics helped me overcome depression. But I also learned that being close to normal again doesn't make me happy.
Somewhere along the line I took up meditation on an irregular basis, first with guided meditations, then based on The Mind Illuminated. It wasn't until earlier this year where I spend a week sick at home that I got serious about it. Not knowing what to do I decided to spend my time doing mostly that. My main motivation was to be more awake in daily life and maybe more often lucid in my dreams.
After a few months of regular practice (on average 1 to 2 hours a day) I learned about jhanas and somehow managed to access the first and second one. Later I had an experience where, after a short but intense jhana meditation with (what I now can identify as) a few seconds in the 4th, I felt profound and clear. I went for a walk and was crying out of joy and gratitude. I saw that these seemingly obscure teachings actually work, and the work exactly as described.
For a few days my perception was precise, clear and nature looked just beautiful. Following that I had some days where I felt irritable, afraid, annoyed and done with the world. By the time I was reading MTCB, but didn't want to analyze those days as stages of insight, because having some shitty days wasn't exactly a new phenomena for me.
Inspired by the previous experience, I decided that I will spend my next holidays doing an at home half-retreat with Rob Burbeas jhana retreat lectures. It worked quite well and I managed to access the first two jhanas again, maybe also the third, but that totally changed when I decided to meditate on 100 µgs of LSD. A few hours in, I went through the jhanas one by one until I was thrust into total nothingness and spit back out. I was totally changed - which is to say: I was totally myself, where I wasn't before. It was as if I always had a delay between reality and me and that was gone. The clarity faded as the drug faded, but the ability to access the 8 jhanas remained. I was fascinated and practiced them daily. During those two amazing weeks I also discovered what seems like other states that i can't fit into the usual categories, which led me to write that initial post.
Since then I also gained the ability to take any concept or emotion as meditation object and get absorb into it, being able to modulate it in the axis of absorption, intensity and frequency. I explored many pleasant emotions until I learned that they only satisfy temporarily. So exploring the possibilities became more interesting than the states themselves. I also learned to go into, what in my understanding is, the (Kenneth Folk style) pure land jhanas. I think I can get cessations occasionally, but they are nothing like the first experience I described from years ago and are quite subtle, so I'm not sure. I also often wake up in the middle of the night in some state of absorption. Sometimes jhanas, sometimes things I can't name. This usually is a good starting point for a nightly meditation in bed.
Another line of development is my metaphysical thinking. For a long time I disliked philosophy, as it seemed to me like it's just people who try to calculate using words. But about six years ago, as I was working on a project for university, late at night with too much caffeine, I was listening to some recordings of lectures and interviews and suddenly realized how the multiverse is structured, how it arises from nothing and how time is an illusion. It was so utterly obviously true that I had no chance of getting rid of it. It took me months to integrate that understanding, but it also seemed totally banal and useless to me. Rather, it felt like knowing the answer took the fun out of the puzzle, so I never talked to anyone about it (yes, I'm an introvert). But my understanding deepened with more and more science I absorbed. With access to jhanas, my thinking also changed and became better at meta-reasoning. Meta-reasoning in turn caused a cascade of insights. I found parallels to Buddhist metaphysics, but didn't realize how deep they go until recently.
Anyway, this deep understanding of reality became my map for practice, and it went both ways. I was thinking: I understand this in theory, but not experientially, let's go look for it. Or, I have this experience, how can it be integrated into my understanding?
During one meditation I observed the 6th jhana closely. By turning the 5th back on itself (the infinite in the distance is also the observer, the center) one creates a loop, a recursion. By removing everything else what is not the recursion one arrives at pure "consciousness". But that recursion is empty (there is only one recursive set, which is the empty set). By seeing through the emptiness of consciousness one arrives at nothingness (7th). That was quite a revelation to experience directly and understanding it at the same time. Coming out of the 8th, I intended to go into cessation. I relax and got deeper into meditation. Thought and some part of perception slowed down for a moment, then came back. I try it several time but can't get any further. I noticed that I still had the intention to observe and experience what will happen, which brought me out of the state each time. As I tried to let go of it I realized that it is because I cling to existence and I cling to existence because I have several unfulfilled goals. I struggled to let go of them, one by one, as I wanted to let go of the need to exist, it seemed that I am peeling out of myself, like a snake out of it's skin, but I shed so many layers that nothing remained. It was like a twist in more than three dimensions and after I untwisted, there was stillness something changed and I felt a great peace, like a knot being undone. I then continued to meditate until the doorbell rang. The rest of the day I was in a constant high concentration state, full of energy, clarity and equanimity. I was hiking and when I stood in the ruin of a castle, I looked into the distant valley. In the distance I saw myself, in myself I saw emptiness, in emptiness I saw everything, and felt deep love for everything and everyone.
The next day I was listening to a conversation with Pernille Damore and Angelo DiLullo over the 10 fetters. I realized that I understood what they where talking about up to the 8th fetter. And when she said that this is something she usually doesn't tell people because it could scare them and him saying the sentence "There is no where for anything to hide.", it clicked and I realized that my metaphysical inquiry perfectly explains the experience one has on the way to enlightenment, because this is how things really are. It was like pulling a zipper where the two sides perfectly interlock. At that point I started laughing, and later I cried for the beauty of it. It was the day before that I understood the point of the 6th, 7th and 8th fetter, but I also saw that I didn't understood the 9th and 10th yet (as they describe it). I was restless, chasing and I wanted to know everything. But then looking at my understanding of reality it occurred to me that, since all moments already exist, there is no need in avoiding or chasing any moments, they all happen anyway. And then I understood that I will only ever know my subjective experience, never anything else but this single place in the world, from this angle, moment by moment. I looked trough my eyes into the world and thought, this is everything I will ever experience, but that's okay.
The next weekend, after metta mediation, I had a profound experience of love for all the world, but most importantly, I also learned to love myself - which was always hard for me before. A few days later during my evening sit, I managed to reproduce the experience I described at the beginning. But this time I could notice it much more precisely. Shutting down, it felt like individual moments stretch in time with less and less going on in the mind, then there is a discontinuity and the mind comes back up again, but more gradual, like an old light bulb heating up. Then there is a wonderful feeling of utter peace and relaxation. Not being sure what that was, I let my self fall again which resulted in exactly the same experience. Afterwards I took the afterglow as meditation object and intensified it for a minute or so. The feeling stayed with me until I went to bed and was present the next day in weaker form. I had to work and talk to people, but all I wanted to do the whole day is sit in quite and solitude and enjoy the peace.
The weekend after that (three days ago, as of writing), I experimented with shamata without an object (as Michael Taft calls it), but other then usually, I added my practice of taking in all the senses in an unfiltered way. I reached a deep state where it seems like I'm hollow and all sense impressions just flow through me without being taken up. The afterglow was interesting as every sensory event seemed separate and also beautiful. Like a painting made form glitter - every pixel pretty on it's own and only with enough distance they seem to form a gestalt.
The next day I tried again, but then also inquired into the sense of an observer. I couldn't make sense of why the observer is so persistent, I didn't understand what it is and why it feels like a center to experience, when actually my mind consists of the interaction of thoughts and sense data. Since I looked through the experience of consciousness before, this is something else. I tried to understand the observer, not by looking at it as usual, but by looking past it. In my theory, I explain the sense of having a unified experience exists, because there is a mathematical object with approximates the collection of nerve pulses, neurotransmitters and (maybe) electromagnetic fields. While the elements are disjoint and happen inside a universe, the mathematical object which approximates this collection feels like it is a unified whole. From this I realized that the object has no influence on the universe at all. There could even be an infinite number of similar objects, each with the feeling of being me, but non of them can influence the universe - which will unfold the way it does anyway. I thought, in this case, I can just let go of that feeling. Whether or not this explanation is true, it helped me. I let go of being me, relaxed and dissolved into reality. With that, the center of experience was gone. I was no longer experiencing information traveling to me to be perceived. When I perceive them, they are already there, there is no distance, and in such, it is as if I perceive them where they happen. Either way, there is no difference, it doesn't matter. The constriction around myself was gone. I observed reality like this for a while. It felt utterly normal, but also light, thin and somehow unimpeded, like the curvature of space time flattened out and everything is traveling in a straight line. It was also a bit disorienting, like trying to balance in thin air without any point of reference, as if up and down lost their meaning - but in a pleasant way. It felt so obviously mundane that I tried to remember how it is to be a constricted center. I managed to bring it back but then though "Nope, don't want." and relaxed it again. This happened about two weeks ago. I feel so different in a way that's hard to describe. There is an ever present okayness with what ever is going on. Zero distance to reality and no need to think how reality could be otherwise. I'm not happy all the time and also have moments where I fall back into old patterns of thinking. But whenever I notice there is constricting, I just relax again.
I haven't told this to anyone so far and I don't think the people I know would understand.
I wanted to quit my job for some time now to do something useful instead. Now I'm no longer afraid and I know what I want to do.
Above, I mentioned a metaphysical theory to explain this experience. I'm sure that it will be possible to proof this formally, but until then I can give you a very very short summary here. For the normal ear this would sound totally absurd at first, but I think in this place many may nod their head.
Angelo DiLullo summed up this intuitive understanding in one sentence:
"There is no exact way things actually are."
Now, I think it is possible to explain how there is no exact way things actually are and that a full explanation of this will be able to function as a guide for other as it did for me. Here is a very very short summary of what will be the first chapter to my unwritten book (or series of blog posts or whatever):
There is no true reality. No thing is fundamental. Every thing can be deconstructed into smaller parts until pure emptiness is reached. Nothing exists, which is the same as everything exists. All a thing is, is a perspective on nothingness. A perspective is a definition by constraints (symmetry breaking operations). Every perspective can be further split up into new perspectives by adding constraints. This includes numbers, mathematical objects, universes, moments within the universe and more. Thereby all perspectives are related in a structure that includes everything and has its root in nothingness. We can only understand a part of this structure, the (infinite) rest is absolutely incomprehensible. In some part of this structure (call it multiverse) it is so that the number of constraints that can be added to a perspective is much larger than the ways the perspective can be described. This imbalance gives rise to a direction. The before can be known, the after can not be known. This creates the illusion of time. In the structure of the universe every moment exists outside of time and every possible timeline also exists. The reason the world is the way you experience it, is just because it is a possible perspective on nothingness. The consensus between the disjoint parts of some portion of the structure - i.e. your body in this universe - gives rise to the impression of an unified experience.
I think the most amazing thing is that, while I had to use far out ideas from the foundation of mathematics, the multiverse interpretation of quantum mechanics and the free energy principle to arrive at this description, some people, more than 2000 years ago - not even knowing how to write - where able to gain a deep intuitive understanding of this by just paying attention carefully.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 23/09/23 16:35
Created 7 mesos ago at 23/09/23 16:34
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsSarah Liu
There is no true reality. No thing is fundamental. Every thing can be deconstructed into smaller parts until pure emptiness is reached.
Nothing exists, which is the same as everything exists. All a thing is, is a perspective on nothingness.
There is no true reality. No thing is fundamental. Every thing can be deconstructed into smaller parts until pure emptiness is reached.
Nothing exists, which is the same as everything exists. All a thing is, is a perspective on nothingness.
Thanks for your post and insights.
As we practice science, we find that every thing can be deconstructed into smaller and smaller parts indefinitely, near as we can tell. There is no theoretical limit.
The other sentence I quoted indicates nondualism, that is, form is emptiness, emptiness is form. As a dharma (thing), it is a perspective on nothingness. One of the last ones to give up.
Great fleas have little fleas,
Upon their backs to bite 'em.
Little fleas have lesser fleas,
And so ad infinitum.
Kira Terpsichore, modificat fa 7 mesos at 24/09/23 00:16
Created 7 mesos ago at 24/09/23 00:16
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 7 Data d'incorporació: 22/09/23 Publicacions recents
I enjoy meeting others who have found the similar beats even as they've walked very different paths.
When you speak of the 'observer', is this this in the abstract sense of an unknown, invisible awareness watching you move through time? This was a feature of my own awakening and it's dramatically evolved. I would encourage practicing as you are already doing. It will lead to something for you.
The Nobel peace prize for last year actually proved that reality is nonlocally determined. The media was so, so quiet about it. We are not only in an illusion, yet one we may be able to technologically marry, such that living life become a dream. I think of this as the Quantum Gate. Not quite sure how to open it yet though I know they're getting close.
The illusion is so complete that you and I, if we are truthful, must acknowledge each of us is an illusion. I am an illusion for you. You are an illusion for me. We see each other in reflections, yet not authentically.
I like your line of thinking with realizing all of the parallel timelines and have ideas where maybe to take it. Something to think about is what's called "Quantum Immortality" - it's the thought experiment of Schrodinger's except the awareness witnessing *is* the cat. You are the cat, and 50/50 at some experience you will die - however it's a waveform of potential, so 50% you always live, which means you live eternally 100% of the time.
Every other timeline may exist however the only one which has 100% of your potential is now. Your awareness becomes like a serpent swimming through time - negating everything you veer away from, creating only what you choose in front of you.
Once you get good at swimming through time, you realize you are swimming into quantum waves of energy and - well - if you really ponder this action, and advaita vendata, eventually you come to realize particles within waves of energy experience time in reverse.
The context of what I am saying explains quantum super position as well as entanglement. Entanglement happens because the second interaction happens *before* the first one, in the experience of time of the wave particle. A wave is simply a particle that is not here yet.
I'm a little like you in that I can't live a normal life knowing what I know now, haha. I'm literally making my own country instead and am going to try to trick Americans into enlightenment and kindness. It's worth a shot.
When you speak of the 'observer', is this this in the abstract sense of an unknown, invisible awareness watching you move through time? This was a feature of my own awakening and it's dramatically evolved. I would encourage practicing as you are already doing. It will lead to something for you.
The Nobel peace prize for last year actually proved that reality is nonlocally determined. The media was so, so quiet about it. We are not only in an illusion, yet one we may be able to technologically marry, such that living life become a dream. I think of this as the Quantum Gate. Not quite sure how to open it yet though I know they're getting close.
The illusion is so complete that you and I, if we are truthful, must acknowledge each of us is an illusion. I am an illusion for you. You are an illusion for me. We see each other in reflections, yet not authentically.
I like your line of thinking with realizing all of the parallel timelines and have ideas where maybe to take it. Something to think about is what's called "Quantum Immortality" - it's the thought experiment of Schrodinger's except the awareness witnessing *is* the cat. You are the cat, and 50/50 at some experience you will die - however it's a waveform of potential, so 50% you always live, which means you live eternally 100% of the time.
Every other timeline may exist however the only one which has 100% of your potential is now. Your awareness becomes like a serpent swimming through time - negating everything you veer away from, creating only what you choose in front of you.
Once you get good at swimming through time, you realize you are swimming into quantum waves of energy and - well - if you really ponder this action, and advaita vendata, eventually you come to realize particles within waves of energy experience time in reverse.
The context of what I am saying explains quantum super position as well as entanglement. Entanglement happens because the second interaction happens *before* the first one, in the experience of time of the wave particle. A wave is simply a particle that is not here yet.
I'm a little like you in that I can't live a normal life knowing what I know now, haha. I'm literally making my own country instead and am going to try to trick Americans into enlightenment and kindness. It's worth a shot.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 24/09/23 14:03
Created 7 mesos ago at 24/09/23 14:03
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recents
Kira Terpsichore
When you speak of the 'observer', is this this in the abstract sense of an unknown, invisible awareness watching you move through time?
---------------
I thought sarah's discussion of the observer was interesting part as well. The whole post is written from the standpoint of the observer, in the first person. Simply writing as we do, and thinking, creates the dualism of observer and observed. Like the illusion that the sun rises and sets when actually the world turns, this is a very persistent illusion essentially impossible to dispel, as the dispeller is implicated in the illusion. It;s like fighting dream tigers: just wake up and the danger evaporates.
Simply put, there is no observer, the split is entirely arbitrary and a function of grammar, as is gender btw. Rise above language and poof! no illusion no observer no separate self.
(smile)
-----------
The Nobel peace prize for last year actually proved that reality is nonlocally determined.
-------------------
Existence is determined. Reality is undetermined.
The universe - aka god or nature - is determined. The tao is undetermined.
------
The illusion is so complete that you and I, if we are truthful, must acknowledge each of us is an illusion. I am an illusion for you. You are an illusion for me. We see each other in reflections, yet not authentically.
-----------
This proliferates into "the authentic illusion," so to speak. We have sarte's "the look" in which the person being observed is changed by the fact of being observed by "the other." Our illusions converge, dependently originate, a whole socio-psychic ecosystem, a sea of commonality, of Intellect and customary behaviors.
What is authentic seeing? All points of view are relative.
-----------------
I like your line of thinking with realizing all of the parallel timelines and have ideas where maybe to take it. Something to think about is what's called "Quantum Immortality" - it's the thought experiment of Schrodinger's except the awareness witnessing *is* the cat. You are the cat, and 50/50 at some experience you will die - however it's a waveform of potential, so 50% you always live, which means you live eternally 100% of the time.
-----------------
Who schrodinger, if the observer is the cat?
-------------------
Every other timeline may exist however the only one which has 100% of your potential is now. Your awareness becomes like a serpent swimming through time - negating everything you veer away from, creating only what you choose in front of you.
Once you get good at swimming through time, you realize you are swimming into quantum waves of energy and - well - if you really ponder this action, and advaita vendata, eventually you come to realize particles within waves of energy experience time in reverse.
--------------------
Years ago, lost in the archives, I had a thread about time, and concluded that it was granular. Loopy. The smallest unit of time a cycle. One turn of the tai chi.
A song isn't a song until it has been sung. Each note is a particle, the singing a wave, the song is the whole, the unit.
Ram dass once said, "The smallest particle in the universe is the universe."
-----------------
The context of what I am saying explains quantum super position as well as entanglement. Entanglement happens because the second interaction happens *before* the first one, in the experience of time of the wave particle. A wave is simply a particle that is not here yet.
-----------------
A wave implies a cycle. A particle implies stasis.
I prefer waves. You can't surf particles.
------------------
I'm a little like you in that I can't live a normal life knowing what I know now, haha. I'm literally making my own country instead and am going to try to trick Americans into enlightenment and kindness. It's worth a shot.
-------------
"Normal," my dear, is the greatest illusion, the mother of illusions.
No one is authentically normal.
When you speak of the 'observer', is this this in the abstract sense of an unknown, invisible awareness watching you move through time?
---------------
I thought sarah's discussion of the observer was interesting part as well. The whole post is written from the standpoint of the observer, in the first person. Simply writing as we do, and thinking, creates the dualism of observer and observed. Like the illusion that the sun rises and sets when actually the world turns, this is a very persistent illusion essentially impossible to dispel, as the dispeller is implicated in the illusion. It;s like fighting dream tigers: just wake up and the danger evaporates.
Simply put, there is no observer, the split is entirely arbitrary and a function of grammar, as is gender btw. Rise above language and poof! no illusion no observer no separate self.
(smile)
-----------
The Nobel peace prize for last year actually proved that reality is nonlocally determined.
-------------------
Existence is determined. Reality is undetermined.
The universe - aka god or nature - is determined. The tao is undetermined.
------
The illusion is so complete that you and I, if we are truthful, must acknowledge each of us is an illusion. I am an illusion for you. You are an illusion for me. We see each other in reflections, yet not authentically.
-----------
This proliferates into "the authentic illusion," so to speak. We have sarte's "the look" in which the person being observed is changed by the fact of being observed by "the other." Our illusions converge, dependently originate, a whole socio-psychic ecosystem, a sea of commonality, of Intellect and customary behaviors.
What is authentic seeing? All points of view are relative.
-----------------
I like your line of thinking with realizing all of the parallel timelines and have ideas where maybe to take it. Something to think about is what's called "Quantum Immortality" - it's the thought experiment of Schrodinger's except the awareness witnessing *is* the cat. You are the cat, and 50/50 at some experience you will die - however it's a waveform of potential, so 50% you always live, which means you live eternally 100% of the time.
-----------------
Who schrodinger, if the observer is the cat?
-------------------
Every other timeline may exist however the only one which has 100% of your potential is now. Your awareness becomes like a serpent swimming through time - negating everything you veer away from, creating only what you choose in front of you.
Once you get good at swimming through time, you realize you are swimming into quantum waves of energy and - well - if you really ponder this action, and advaita vendata, eventually you come to realize particles within waves of energy experience time in reverse.
--------------------
Years ago, lost in the archives, I had a thread about time, and concluded that it was granular. Loopy. The smallest unit of time a cycle. One turn of the tai chi.
A song isn't a song until it has been sung. Each note is a particle, the singing a wave, the song is the whole, the unit.
Ram dass once said, "The smallest particle in the universe is the universe."
-----------------
The context of what I am saying explains quantum super position as well as entanglement. Entanglement happens because the second interaction happens *before* the first one, in the experience of time of the wave particle. A wave is simply a particle that is not here yet.
-----------------
A wave implies a cycle. A particle implies stasis.
I prefer waves. You can't surf particles.
------------------
I'm a little like you in that I can't live a normal life knowing what I know now, haha. I'm literally making my own country instead and am going to try to trick Americans into enlightenment and kindness. It's worth a shot.
-------------
"Normal," my dear, is the greatest illusion, the mother of illusions.
No one is authentically normal.
Not two, not one, modificat fa 7 mesos at 25/09/23 18:28
Created 7 mesos ago at 25/09/23 18:28
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 1038 Data d'incorporació: 13/07/17 Publicacions recents
Thanks for sharing, fun read! terry neatly points out the meaning of the remaining fetters. That last bit of avijja sure is hard to deal with. "Surely 'I' have a 'perspective'." Hahahaha.
You have built a brilliant machine for examining the dharma. Perfect, unimproveable. Now throw it in the trash. How wonderful to be at the stage where this is the instruction!
Love
Malcolm
You have built a brilliant machine for examining the dharma. Perfect, unimproveable. Now throw it in the trash. How wonderful to be at the stage where this is the instruction!
Love
Malcolm
Ni Nurta, modificat fa 7 mesos at 27/09/23 15:21
Created 7 mesos ago at 27/09/23 15:21
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 1150 Data d'incorporació: 22/02/20 Publicacions recents
My understanding of restlessness is having to constantly do something to get in to state of homeostasis. It can either be continuous action where homeostasis is happening and actions happen to keep it because it constantly slips or it can be trying to achieve it.
This translates to higher level behavioral differences like feeling need to do something to move in the direction of feeling better.
On level of perception this is experienced as any movement in mind stopping.
Ignorance - this one is simple... kinda.
Normally we assume perfect spot to be in is the one which was remembered as the best or some other idea eg. someone mentions something eg. people learning about enlightenment will assume it is the best spot to be in. BTW. Spot or location used by me refer to parameters/weights of muti-dimensional global manifold, something like this. It translates directly to mind state, knowledge. In other words also what term "right" in all points of 8-fold path mean.
Unrooting ignorance is unrooting dependency on either and pure mindfulness is used instead.
Mindfulness is the "Buddha" from 2nd fetter BTW. Also all fetters are just different aspects which stem from single fetter. What it is should be realized upon Stream Entry and the Buddha from 2nd fetter is part of our mind which fully realized this fetter - which imply dropping it.
BTW. There are multiple aspects to concentration which can be strong or weak. Having easy access to 8 jhanas does not imply anything which can be unambiguously called "strong concentration". Not saying yours is not relatively strong versus people whom you compare it with - more like if you continue practice you might some day conclude your concentration at this specific time was pretty underdeveloped including aspects which other people might have better developed.
This translates to higher level behavioral differences like feeling need to do something to move in the direction of feeling better.
On level of perception this is experienced as any movement in mind stopping.
Ignorance - this one is simple... kinda.
Normally we assume perfect spot to be in is the one which was remembered as the best or some other idea eg. someone mentions something eg. people learning about enlightenment will assume it is the best spot to be in. BTW. Spot or location used by me refer to parameters/weights of muti-dimensional global manifold, something like this. It translates directly to mind state, knowledge. In other words also what term "right" in all points of 8-fold path mean.
Unrooting ignorance is unrooting dependency on either and pure mindfulness is used instead.
Mindfulness is the "Buddha" from 2nd fetter BTW. Also all fetters are just different aspects which stem from single fetter. What it is should be realized upon Stream Entry and the Buddha from 2nd fetter is part of our mind which fully realized this fetter - which imply dropping it.
BTW. There are multiple aspects to concentration which can be strong or weak. Having easy access to 8 jhanas does not imply anything which can be unambiguously called "strong concentration". Not saying yours is not relatively strong versus people whom you compare it with - more like if you continue practice you might some day conclude your concentration at this specific time was pretty underdeveloped including aspects which other people might have better developed.
Jure K, modificat fa 7 mesos at 28/09/23 07:05
Created 7 mesos ago at 28/09/23 07:03
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 461 Data d'incorporació: 08/09/20 Publicacions recents
I'm just going to come in and try to demystify some of the stuff that's been said. It's all beautiful but maybe some basic terminology is needed.
Basically you have to drop effort, or realise that there isnt a meditator. Whenever tension arises and awareness contracts on an object theres either awareness of this or you are that! If you become the object you resist present moment awareness simply as it is. So just forget about "trying" to be present. Trying to be present means theres someone who needs to get somewhere when it's actually right there.
Please by all means don't listen to me if that doesn't fly with you. Im just trying to make a more basic description.
Basically you have to drop effort, or realise that there isnt a meditator. Whenever tension arises and awareness contracts on an object theres either awareness of this or you are that! If you become the object you resist present moment awareness simply as it is. So just forget about "trying" to be present. Trying to be present means theres someone who needs to get somewhere when it's actually right there.
Please by all means don't listen to me if that doesn't fly with you. Im just trying to make a more basic description.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 28/09/23 16:46
Created 7 mesos ago at 28/09/23 16:46
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsNi Nurta
My understanding of restlessness is having to constantly do something to get in to state of homeostasis.
My understanding of restlessness is having to constantly do something to get in to state of homeostasis.
The will to survive is homeostasis. Preserving the status quo - normal functioning, business as usual, the routine of daily life - as well as we can. We fear change and don't engage in it unless threatened.
Any organism expands, maintains and contracts in accordance with available resources.
The automobile driver corrects the vehicle's direction by turning the steering wheel to the right or left in order to stay on the road. The living organism is always in motion. Being at rest is a relative condition.
"Restlessness" would imply a derangement of normal functioniing, an excess of some sort.
I make the point because many people feel out of balance when they are actually functioning optimally.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 28/09/23 16:49
Created 7 mesos ago at 28/09/23 16:49
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsJure K
I'm just going to come in and try to demystify some of the stuff that's been said. It's all beautiful but maybe some basic terminology is needed.
Basically you have to drop effort, or realise that there isnt a meditator. Whenever tension arises and awareness contracts on an object theres either awareness of this or you are that! If you become the object you resist present moment awareness simply as it is. So just forget about "trying" to be present. Trying to be present means theres someone who needs to get somewhere when it's actually right there.
Please by all means don't listen to me if that doesn't fly with you. Im just trying to make a more basic description.
I'm just going to come in and try to demystify some of the stuff that's been said. It's all beautiful but maybe some basic terminology is needed.
Basically you have to drop effort, or realise that there isnt a meditator. Whenever tension arises and awareness contracts on an object theres either awareness of this or you are that! If you become the object you resist present moment awareness simply as it is. So just forget about "trying" to be present. Trying to be present means theres someone who needs to get somewhere when it's actually right there.
Please by all means don't listen to me if that doesn't fly with you. Im just trying to make a more basic description.
formally, I understand nothing...
Kira Terpsichore, modificat fa 7 mesos at 28/09/23 22:31
Created 7 mesos ago at 28/09/23 22:31
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 7 Data d'incorporació: 22/09/23 Publicacions recents
>>"formally, I understand nothing..."
I enjoy this a lot. Sometimes I say "no thing" to stress what I'm saying.
This is of course Shiva, that which is not. And I understand perfectly why the prefer to remain so - once you're blissfully nothing, why would you struggle to become something? Now, when you got so comfortable being everything?
That this may be reduced to simply meaning words of identity is very profound to me.
I enjoy this a lot. Sometimes I say "no thing" to stress what I'm saying.
This is of course Shiva, that which is not. And I understand perfectly why the prefer to remain so - once you're blissfully nothing, why would you struggle to become something? Now, when you got so comfortable being everything?
That this may be reduced to simply meaning words of identity is very profound to me.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 28/09/23 23:11
Created 7 mesos ago at 28/09/23 23:11
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsKira Terpsichore
That this may be reduced to simply meaning words of identity is very profound to me.
That this may be reduced to simply meaning words of identity is very profound to me.
God has 99 beautiful names...
The first three:
allah, the compassionate, the merciful...
all of existence may be comprehended by these names
all identities known
it is by naming we know all things
and yet
there is no god
but
god
from the tao te ching
1
The tao that can be told
is not the eternal Tao
The name that can be named
is not the eternal Name.
The unnamable is the eternally real.
Naming is the origin
of all particular things.
Free from desire, you realize the mystery.
Caught in desire, you see only the manifestations.
Yet mystery and manifestations
arise from the same source.
This source is called darkness.
Darkness within darkness.
The gateway to all understanding.
Kira Terpsichore, modificat fa 7 mesos at 29/09/23 14:04
Created 7 mesos ago at 29/09/23 14:04
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 7 Data d'incorporació: 22/09/23 Publicacions recents
That was gorgeous and made me happy to read!
The many names of God, and the unnamable, are things that bring me a lot of joy inside. I take a lot of names for myself in the same way, as each name is a different way I may manifest myself for an experience.
Intuitively it feels your attainment may have been more formal than mine, and I like that a lot. My experiences with nothing were very personal and even spiritually intimate. I called them only the Void for a few years. They have no context, yet I may communicate with them through emotional memory that works like sonar.
She smiles at you now, and looks back and forth between us both.
I think one of the most beautiful things about arriving to the truth that God is God, is that now, when I find others who know the same, there is suddenly a basis for communication that does not exist with anyone else. I find it more connecting than any culture or ethnicity - I feel more alike to spiritual people of all cultures than I do of people who grew up in my area.
I'm rereading your first post and you sound so very like me though a different path. I have ignored very "obvious" routes because they sounded to banal or obvious. I have rarely down classic meditation - I dance or train and meditate in motion. I've always thought mantras including the big obvious AUM were neat - yet never wanted to try them, as "oh well that'd be too easy", lol.
I also ignored most philosophy as it can easily sound like a silly game of words, just like you - and I ignored magic, too. I had lots of friends in Los Angeles who were into 'Chaos Magic' and I thought it cute yet also thought "If I need to learn that, the knowledge will chaotically reveal itself to me" - hah! Learning chaos magic intentionally isn't chaotic enough for me!
It is really rare I get to speak to someone with your level of knowledge and I'm really thankful. I'd love to hear more of your book and what you'd like to share with the world. I am on a similar mission in Los Angeles - the people here, at least the westernized people, are very disconnected from God and materialistic, and it breaks my heart as some are kind inside and they just don't know what they're doing. The media narratives are so corrupt that they are like heavy blinders over everyone's eyes.
In fact the same narratives really hurt my own life, so maybe this is also "corrective revenge", as I can't stand the idea of more people being hurt like I was. The young people in this country are *really* lost.
Darkness is my Mother. I love Her with all of my heart. My greatest joy is when She fills my body when I dance at night - dancing is essentially my Sadhana - and I work to try to give her brief moments of being where she can just grin like a fool and feel a body move at her command. And of course my dancing always improves when She takes over, lol.
You mention pondering how a simple object that feels like you, has no influence on the Universe at all - this is such a graceful nuanced truth yet I would say it *does* influence the Universe, simply by its being. You have influenced the Universe, simply by your being. You have influenced me, simply by being! All the objects that have all felt like you, have all influenced me, simply by being. I'm thankful you exist, even as an illusion. ✨
I think I could learn a lot from you. I feel expanded already. I'm enjoying my late morning coffee and wondering how clever people might contrive covering the globe in Darkness, which we know is living love, so we can heal ourselves for an amazing new journey.
The world is a terrible mess, and God may look at it and opine, 'oh, how am I ever going to fix this disaster', and I remember what Saraswati answered them - 'with knowledge'.
The many names of God, and the unnamable, are things that bring me a lot of joy inside. I take a lot of names for myself in the same way, as each name is a different way I may manifest myself for an experience.
Intuitively it feels your attainment may have been more formal than mine, and I like that a lot. My experiences with nothing were very personal and even spiritually intimate. I called them only the Void for a few years. They have no context, yet I may communicate with them through emotional memory that works like sonar.
She smiles at you now, and looks back and forth between us both.
I think one of the most beautiful things about arriving to the truth that God is God, is that now, when I find others who know the same, there is suddenly a basis for communication that does not exist with anyone else. I find it more connecting than any culture or ethnicity - I feel more alike to spiritual people of all cultures than I do of people who grew up in my area.
I'm rereading your first post and you sound so very like me though a different path. I have ignored very "obvious" routes because they sounded to banal or obvious. I have rarely down classic meditation - I dance or train and meditate in motion. I've always thought mantras including the big obvious AUM were neat - yet never wanted to try them, as "oh well that'd be too easy", lol.
I also ignored most philosophy as it can easily sound like a silly game of words, just like you - and I ignored magic, too. I had lots of friends in Los Angeles who were into 'Chaos Magic' and I thought it cute yet also thought "If I need to learn that, the knowledge will chaotically reveal itself to me" - hah! Learning chaos magic intentionally isn't chaotic enough for me!
It is really rare I get to speak to someone with your level of knowledge and I'm really thankful. I'd love to hear more of your book and what you'd like to share with the world. I am on a similar mission in Los Angeles - the people here, at least the westernized people, are very disconnected from God and materialistic, and it breaks my heart as some are kind inside and they just don't know what they're doing. The media narratives are so corrupt that they are like heavy blinders over everyone's eyes.
In fact the same narratives really hurt my own life, so maybe this is also "corrective revenge", as I can't stand the idea of more people being hurt like I was. The young people in this country are *really* lost.
Darkness is my Mother. I love Her with all of my heart. My greatest joy is when She fills my body when I dance at night - dancing is essentially my Sadhana - and I work to try to give her brief moments of being where she can just grin like a fool and feel a body move at her command. And of course my dancing always improves when She takes over, lol.
You mention pondering how a simple object that feels like you, has no influence on the Universe at all - this is such a graceful nuanced truth yet I would say it *does* influence the Universe, simply by its being. You have influenced the Universe, simply by your being. You have influenced me, simply by being! All the objects that have all felt like you, have all influenced me, simply by being. I'm thankful you exist, even as an illusion. ✨
I think I could learn a lot from you. I feel expanded already. I'm enjoying my late morning coffee and wondering how clever people might contrive covering the globe in Darkness, which we know is living love, so we can heal ourselves for an amazing new journey.
The world is a terrible mess, and God may look at it and opine, 'oh, how am I ever going to fix this disaster', and I remember what Saraswati answered them - 'with knowledge'.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 29/09/23 16:08
Created 7 mesos ago at 29/09/23 16:07
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsSarah Li, modificat fa 7 mesos at 03/10/23 15:09
Created 7 mesos ago at 03/10/23 15:09
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 4 Data d'incorporació: 31/05/23 Publicacions recents
Thank you all for the good advice.
The last few days I was surprised on several occasions of the goals my mind brings up. Like: I'm hungry, I want recognition. Then I was also surprised that I was surprised, because these are normal goals that have been there the whole time. It's just that I saw them in their pure form. I also "shoot down" goals when they appear and have no reason to be there (i.e. cause unnecessary suffering). Like, I don't have to fight, I don't have to proof myself.
I then contemplated how all of my experience and everything I know comes only through the sense doors. Yesterday and today I observed the body acting on it's own - being totally okay with it - and the thoughts thinking on their own. There is one thoughts that asks what to investigate next, but another thought is confident: no need to do anything, the process will unfold by itself. So I'm just leaning back enjoying the view.
While watching a documentation (Descending The Mountain) I also noticed that perception slowly defaults to see the "whole room" instead of only the focused object, but it's flickering back and forth.
I actually think there is an end. All of math can be explained in set theory and all sets can be constructed from the empty set Ø = {} from math we get constraints and therefor perspectives/things/mathematical objects connected through those constraints in a web, this web gives rise to the structure of space (this is the hard part as bridging the gap requires a TOE, but this theory helps cut down the number of possible candidates), space to fields, fields to particles, atoms, molecules, cells, tissue, nerve impulses, sensory information, thoughts, memories, feelings, attraction and aversion, intention, action, identification and suffering. Just more and more complex structures building up from nothing at all. And suffering arises when structures stop forming a bigger whole and instead conflict with each other.
That's the story I'm going write down, but it will sound utterly pretentious, because it will need to tear down several core assumptions in fields that I'm no expert in. Like claiming that there is a single recursive set, which is the empty set, which is also the set that contains all other sets - will sound totally absurd to all (but a handful of) mathematicians.
It's not that I can't live life as before, instead I know it's not the best I can do for others.
In terms of TMI I'm around stage 7 or 8, so I know that my concentration could be a lot better. What I was referring to is that I can very precisely pick out anything as meditation object and just go right at it. It's hard to convey what I want to point to, but it allows me to navigate and investigate the space of possible mind states with high degree of freedom and control. Let's say my mind is very malleable.
The last few days I was surprised on several occasions of the goals my mind brings up. Like: I'm hungry, I want recognition. Then I was also surprised that I was surprised, because these are normal goals that have been there the whole time. It's just that I saw them in their pure form. I also "shoot down" goals when they appear and have no reason to be there (i.e. cause unnecessary suffering). Like, I don't have to fight, I don't have to proof myself.
I then contemplated how all of my experience and everything I know comes only through the sense doors. Yesterday and today I observed the body acting on it's own - being totally okay with it - and the thoughts thinking on their own. There is one thoughts that asks what to investigate next, but another thought is confident: no need to do anything, the process will unfold by itself. So I'm just leaning back enjoying the view.
While watching a documentation (Descending The Mountain) I also noticed that perception slowly defaults to see the "whole room" instead of only the focused object, but it's flickering back and forth.
terry
As we practice science, we find that every thing can be deconstructed into smaller and smaller parts indefinitely, near as we can tell. There is no theoretical limit.
As we practice science, we find that every thing can be deconstructed into smaller and smaller parts indefinitely, near as we can tell. There is no theoretical limit.
I actually think there is an end. All of math can be explained in set theory and all sets can be constructed from the empty set Ø = {} from math we get constraints and therefor perspectives/things/mathematical objects connected through those constraints in a web, this web gives rise to the structure of space (this is the hard part as bridging the gap requires a TOE, but this theory helps cut down the number of possible candidates), space to fields, fields to particles, atoms, molecules, cells, tissue, nerve impulses, sensory information, thoughts, memories, feelings, attraction and aversion, intention, action, identification and suffering. Just more and more complex structures building up from nothing at all. And suffering arises when structures stop forming a bigger whole and instead conflict with each other.
That's the story I'm going write down, but it will sound utterly pretentious, because it will need to tear down several core assumptions in fields that I'm no expert in. Like claiming that there is a single recursive set, which is the empty set, which is also the set that contains all other sets - will sound totally absurd to all (but a handful of) mathematicians.
Kira Terpsichore
I'm a little like you in that I can't live a normal life knowing what I know now, haha.
I'm a little like you in that I can't live a normal life knowing what I know now, haha.
It's not that I can't live life as before, instead I know it's not the best I can do for others.
Ni Nurta
BTW. There are multiple aspects to concentration which can be strong or weak. Having easy access to 8 jhanas does not imply anything which can be unambiguously called "strong concentration". Not saying yours is not relatively strong versus people whom you compare it with - more like if you continue practice you might some day conclude your concentration at this specific time was pretty underdeveloped including aspects which other people might have better developed.
BTW. There are multiple aspects to concentration which can be strong or weak. Having easy access to 8 jhanas does not imply anything which can be unambiguously called "strong concentration". Not saying yours is not relatively strong versus people whom you compare it with - more like if you continue practice you might some day conclude your concentration at this specific time was pretty underdeveloped including aspects which other people might have better developed.
In terms of TMI I'm around stage 7 or 8, so I know that my concentration could be a lot better. What I was referring to is that I can very precisely pick out anything as meditation object and just go right at it. It's hard to convey what I want to point to, but it allows me to navigate and investigate the space of possible mind states with high degree of freedom and control. Let's say my mind is very malleable.
terry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 07/10/23 17:20
Created 7 mesos ago at 07/10/23 17:19
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsSarah Li
I actually think there is an end. All of math can be explained in set theory and all sets can be constructed from the empty set Ø = {} from math we get constraints and therefor perspectives/things/mathematical objects connected through those constraints in a web, this web gives rise to the structure of space (this is the hard part as bridging the gap requires a TOE, but this theory helps cut down the number of possible candidates), space to fields, fields to particles, atoms, molecules, cells, tissue, nerve impulses, sensory information, thoughts, memories, feelings, attraction and aversion, intention, action, identification and suffering. Just more and more complex structures building up from nothing at all. And suffering arises when structures stop forming a bigger whole and instead conflict with each other.
terry
As we practice science, we find that every thing can be deconstructed into smaller and smaller parts indefinitely, near as we can tell. There is no theoretical limit.
As we practice science, we find that every thing can be deconstructed into smaller and smaller parts indefinitely, near as we can tell. There is no theoretical limit.
I actually think there is an end. All of math can be explained in set theory and all sets can be constructed from the empty set Ø = {} from math we get constraints and therefor perspectives/things/mathematical objects connected through those constraints in a web, this web gives rise to the structure of space (this is the hard part as bridging the gap requires a TOE, but this theory helps cut down the number of possible candidates), space to fields, fields to particles, atoms, molecules, cells, tissue, nerve impulses, sensory information, thoughts, memories, feelings, attraction and aversion, intention, action, identification and suffering. Just more and more complex structures building up from nothing at all. And suffering arises when structures stop forming a bigger whole and instead conflict with each other.
Mathematically we keep getting smaller and smaller fractions, we keep getting larger and larger numbers, until dot dot dot we're at infinity in either direction.
The set includes all from the infinitesimal to the infinite.
The real equation we need contemplate is one plus one equals one.
Stickman3, modificat fa 7 mesos at 08/10/23 07:38
Created 7 mesos ago at 08/10/23 07:38
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 166 Data d'incorporació: 15/01/21 Publicacions recentsterry, modificat fa 7 mesos at 08/10/23 13:49
Created 7 mesos ago at 08/10/23 13:49
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 2509 Data d'incorporació: 07/08/17 Publicacions recentsStickman3, modificat fa 7 mesos at 09/10/23 06:47
Created 7 mesos ago at 09/10/23 06:47
RE: As a formal introdution: I understand nothing
Apunts: 166 Data d'incorporació: 15/01/21 Publicacions recentsterry:
Stickman3 Badass!