Desires and ambition lurking

Saurabh Arvindbhai PARMAR, modified 19 Days ago.

Desires and ambition lurking

Posts: 2 Join Date: 12/14/20 Recent Posts
Hello all.
i am very new here but not be to meditation. Had done so many different style but now i am doing mahasi stye nothing with some other deep breathing technique and the results are great.
What i have found in myself after self observation is that i have lots of desire like to have more money, more power and more sex and more magik power and on the other hand something from inside me holding me back to achieve anything. Its like this spiritual stuff has hit me hard.
I can't let go the feeling of"even though i will get all of those, in the end death will take everything"
But still desire and ambition are lurking day and night though they are not as passionate now as they were before because of the self observation and noting.
But on one hand i feel like i am not living my life fullest by holding me from inside.

Can you sir and mam help me a little.?
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Siavash ', modified 19 Days ago.

RE: Desires and ambition lurking

Posts: 1198 Join Date: 5/5/19 Recent Posts
Hello and welcome.

Hafez says:
"Drink wine, burn altars and pulpits, just don't harm anyone."

One can interpret that differently in each stage of their life of course.
Good luck!​​​​​​​
Saurabh Arvindbhai PARMAR, modified 19 Days ago.

RE: Desires and ambition lurking

Posts: 2 Join Date: 12/14/20 Recent Posts
Thenk you so much for your input.
my main concern is that something inside me holding back to go and earn money to fulfill wish.
May be my mindset or those spiritual teaching that is.
I want to get out of that.
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David Matte, modified 19 Days ago.

RE: Desires and ambition lurking

Posts: 67 Join Date: 8/3/19 Recent Posts
Hello!
Sounds to me like you have started to peek beyond the veil. For at first this entails the startling insight that none of those material objects or pursuits you used to partake in will make you ultimately happy. Sorry to break it to you but this sounds like where things are leading now.
It could have happened that you have crossed into the dark night at some point and now you are sort of "half in and half out" as it were, wistful of your past ways but not quite yet seeing what is more fufilling (the spiritual reality). I definitely recommend reading up on those stages (also called dukkha Nana's) to see if more of what is described resonates with you. 

Also recommend listening to this audio by Adyashanti where he talks about this disorientation as a normal part of the spiritual path.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ttPe1U5T7n0

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