The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/25/22 8:53 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Chris M 4/25/22 3:04 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/25/22 4:53 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Chris M 4/26/22 7:59 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/26/22 12:06 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Chris M 4/26/22 1:02 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/26/22 4:28 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Sigma Tropic 4/28/22 3:10 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/28/22 6:05 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind George S 4/28/22 9:37 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/29/22 8:31 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind George S 5/1/22 9:55 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/3/22 6:35 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind George S 5/4/22 3:01 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/6/22 5:59 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind George S 5/7/22 8:18 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/8/22 2:53 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind George S 5/9/22 12:20 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö 4/29/22 12:10 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/30/22 6:55 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind terry 4/29/22 2:44 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Ni Nurta 4/30/22 1:51 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 4/30/22 6:10 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind terry 4/30/22 2:20 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind terry 4/30/22 2:40 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind terry 4/30/22 2:43 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö 5/1/22 8:22 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Smiling Stone 4/30/22 11:25 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/1/22 9:46 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö 5/1/22 10:41 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind finding-oneself * 4/30/22 11:43 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/1/22 10:05 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Smiling Stone 5/7/22 5:11 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/7/22 11:30 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/7/22 4:37 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/7/22 5:03 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö 5/9/22 3:42 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö 5/24/22 2:53 AM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Arena Heidi 5/26/22 4:07 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Martin 5/26/22 5:36 PM
RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind Chris M 5/26/22 4:20 PM
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Arena Heidi, modified 2 Months ago at 4/25/22 8:53 AM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/25/22 8:42 AM

The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
I am starting this thread to share details about my meditation practice and life. In future posts I will elaborate more about processes that I engage in and explain how those processes are simultaneously the goal. I also will explain about how kindness and compassion are intimately woven into my practice and everything that I do, and also how helpful and healing it is to emphasize those qualities in your practice. However, as a way of introducing myself, I thought I would share a few links that may be of interest to some folks here.

An article of mine was recently reposted on The Association for Spiritual Integrity website: https://www.spiritual-integrity.org/reclaiming-humility-and-humanness-in-art-spirituality-awakening-and-life/ I had been hoping to connect with a few people interested in discussing the things that I wrote about in that article, but that didn’t happen there. Perhaps there may be a few of you here, who will be interested in discussing some aspects of what I wrote? A major theme that I discuss in the article, is that of teaching and living from a space of equality. In my experience unity and equality go together. One of the things that I most appreciate about DhO, is the equality of people freely helping each other here.

In my article I mention “radiant beings, who roamed too far over an edge of mental illness or addiction, and passed beyond without enough time to share their more sensitive light.” One such person was John Brodie, a physicist and spiritual seeker who died tragically in 2006. I wrote a piece about him immediately after he passed for the local newspaper. https://www.kindground.org/presence/remembering-john-h-brodie I only found out after he died that he struggled with mental illness and had been diagnosed as bipolar. I met him at a meditation center that I was involved with at that time. He imparted a kind of spiritual transmission to me before he passed. I intend to write a more in depth sequel to his story. The edge between awakening and mental health issues is more delicate than people realize. I hope to write more about that, too.

I also mention in my article on Reclaiming Humility and Humanness that “expansive beings often incarnate into handicapped bodies and difficult lives because of the extraordinary opportunity and potential those lives offer.” Heather Quaine, is one example of someone who I was referring to when I wrote that sentence. I composed an introductory article about Heather: https://www.kindground.org/presence/the-challenge-of-living-what-you-see I plan to write a sequel that will explain how I've come to know how expansive Heather is. In this particular article, I also write about following a thread. I have been following a thread for a very long time. I did not realize that it was something that others also did, until I stumbled upon two different people who wrote about it. I elaborate more about those folks and what it means to follow a thread in the article. Following a thread explains how I ended up posting here on this forum. The thread pulled me here and has insisted that I post, even though it has been somewhat uncomfortable for me to do so. I would be interested if others of you also feel this sense of following a thread?

​​​​​​​Thank you in advance to anyone who takes the time to check out any of these links and discuss anything that I’ve mentioned. Blessings to you all on your path. May you find yourself in a place of goodness.
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Chris M, modified 2 Months ago at 4/25/22 3:04 PM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/25/22 3:04 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 4417 Join Date: 1/26/13 Recent Posts
Welcome to DhO, Arena. Glad you're here and that you're willing to share your practice with us.

- Chris
Dho Moderator
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Arena Heidi, modified 2 Months ago at 4/25/22 4:53 PM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/25/22 4:53 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Thanks Chris. I feel grateful for your warm welcome and also for Linda's warm welcome on a few other threads. Thank you to both of you for all the work that you do moderating this forum. Even though my path has been quite different from others here, I feel some commonality and also am hopeful that I may be able to bridge to folks here. We'll see how it goes.
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Chris M, modified 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 7:59 AM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 7:59 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 4417 Join Date: 1/26/13 Recent Posts
I read your article and visited your website, Heidi. That process generated a lot of questions, but I'll start first with a comment. It seems that your life has been devoted to the pursuit of equality in interpersonal relationships which in tu8rn hinges on honesty, understanding, and compassion (please correct me if I got that wrong).

Your message seems to me to be on point for this age and where we find ourselves as a species, as a global community, and even as pockets of local societies (nations, communities, etc.). While we have a massively improved capacity to interact thanks to technology, we haven't been able to leverage communications technology to make things better. In fact, we could make a good argument that technologies like Meta and Twitter serve on balance to make things worse. They push us into communications silos where we have, over time, less and less shared experience. We are faster to dismiss what we perceive as "other," and slower to attempt effective communication.

Question: Why? Is our current situation a result of human nature, of politics, of economics, or ?

Second Question: How can spirituality help us overcome this challenge? We seem to be closer to each other in some ways but ever farther apart in other ways.
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Arena Heidi, modified 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 12:06 PM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 12:03 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

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Thanks Chris for taking the time to read my article, see where I am coming from, and being interested in discussing these things. I feel grateful for your response and your questions. I hope that you will answer your own questions, too! I am more interested in discussing these collectively vital topics than I am in sharing my practice, but sharing my practice may happen, too. My practice might be especially useful to those who have experienced a lot of trauma.

It has been my experience that people following a spiritual path tend to just remain in the cul-de-sac of their own group, even after awakening or becoming an advanced practitioner. Also, those on paths that are more similar than different, tend to judge each other and feel superior to one another, which is one reason why I think promoting equality is beneficial. Tibetan Buddhism and Zen can be seen as different but equal to Vipassana.

When I feel a sense of judgment, superiority or inferiority, I find it is a good opportunity to self-reflect and go deeper into these issues both psychologically and through meditation. My practice then leads me towards more openness, receptivity, and compassion. It is puzzling to me as to why people on very dedicated spiritual paths have a hard time bridging to others who are different. One would hope that the spiritual teaching would help people to deal with this very human and common predicament. Ideally, awakening leads to an ability to be vulnerable and the courage to take risks outside of one's comfort zone.

For me, spiritual awakening needs to coincide with political and economic awakening, otherwise one remains asleep in those other domains and is not really awake. Revered spiritual leaders tend to be awake to the political and economic situations of their time periods. Unfortunately, many folks who are awake spiritually, don't seem to make economic and political connections. I think that the spiritual materialism and new age thinking of our time period has tended to promote greed and an obsessive need to acquire wealth and material possessions. I think that a return to simplicity of connection to ourselves, each other, diverse groups, and the earth and nature is beneficial. We don't have to give up technology, but instead find ways to have it enhance communication and connection instead of increasing separatism among groups.

I think change starts with ourselves and every conversation. It sounds corny, but literally each moment is an opportunity to reach out and bridge and enhance connection. I feel grateful Chris, for this opportunity that you are providing. Our conversation thus becomes a small attainment of what we are endeavoring to create here. I hope that others may be inspired to respond as well. I also think that it's helpful to weave thinking about these issues into the beginning stages of spiritual development. So that progress and work on the path is not just for oneself, and that wisdom and compassion may develop and arise together. Wishing you and others reading this all the best.
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Chris M, modified 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 1:02 PM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 1:00 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 4417 Join Date: 1/26/13 Recent Posts
Heidi --

I also think that it's helpful to weave thinking about these issues into the beginning stages of spiritual development. So that progress and work on the path is not just for oneself, and that wisdom and compassion may develop and arise together. Wishing you and others reading this all the best.

This sounds like a good idea - how do we make that happen?

One comment about the various spiritual paths and exclusion vs openness: I don't think proper due is given to the inter-related nature of being human. We're not just singular individuals. What we're comprised of is at least as much social as it is personal. I am the product of the sum of my history and its overlaps with everything in my experience. I can't live without relationships with other beings and to other objects. They are in part me and I am in part them. It's impossible to be otherwise.  Maybe that partially answers my "How do we make that happen" question. 
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Arena Heidi, modified 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 4:28 PM
Created 2 Months ago at 4/26/22 4:28 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
One comment about the various spiritual paths and exclusion vs openness: I don't think proper due is given to the inter-related nature of being human. We're not just singular individuals. What we're comprised of is at least as much social as it is personal. I am the product of the sum of my history and its overlaps with everything in my experience. I can't live without relationships with other beings and to other objects. They are in part me and I am in part them. It's impossible to be otherwise.  

I completely relate to this. These days I tend to feel more like a collective, both internally and externally. Like we all are nestled layers of collective. Talking to others feels the same as talking to myself. I try to remember to be kind in all places and directions. 

(Note to others about my name: Heidi is my first name. Arena is a religious name given to me when I was born. It's pronounced with a soft 'e' similar to 'sand' in Spanish. Most people call me Arena, but it's tricky to use online. So I let people choose which name to call me.)
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Sigma Tropic, modified 1 Month ago at 4/28/22 3:10 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/28/22 2:55 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 326 Join Date: 6/27/17 Recent Posts
Heidi, I really enjoy wandering around on your site. I also feel a sense of collective awakening is where things are going and I think your site is fantastic and the experience of your site transmits emptiness really well, and I think moves in the direction of that collective goal. I really like how you seem so intutitive with yourself, never asking if you're doing it the right way, so intuitive. I think it's really interesting how the dreamworld and the waking world communicate with each other and how your awakening and creativity all seemed to just arise from the dream state. Really cool. I am glad we have you here emoticon  

I like how genuinely you relate to others. I feel expansive when I step into your mind. Your site has pages for the people in your life and it's just cool. I like you. 
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 4/28/22 6:05 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/28/22 6:05 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

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Thank you Sigma Tropic. I feel especially touched by the generosity of your comment. Last year I joined Instagram and made a lot of good connections there. A lot of what I've written has been for that audience, simply because that was the only audience that I had. I connected with a few very dedicated practitioners there, but mostly with folks who feel a sense of collective awakening. It's especially hopeful to meet young people who effortlessly get, feel, and emanate a sense of deeper wisdom. Even when awakening is not grounded in practice, it's refreshing and good. I also have connected with some whose awakening is through the heart, not through understanding. I've been looking for a forum where those kinds of heart centered openings can be valued and welcomed too. I'm scouting out if this forum will be a good place to bring in some of these friends. So far it's been great for me. But ideally, I will also be able to bring in friends who are not as skilled with words.

I have some old friends who are very dedicated Tibetan Buddhist practitioners, and also there is a local Vipassana community where I I live. I have hard a hard time bridging to those friends and that Insight community. So in coming to DhO, I wasn't sure if it would be similar here. So your taking the time to read what I've written and see where I'm coming from, means a lot to me. It offers some kind of balance for all the friends in my life who have not done that. Up until this past year, I have lived my life without being seen. I've come to realize how important it is to be able to see another human being. To recognize on a deep level what their life path is about. Much of my work now revolves around this seeing of another and offering them support. In many ways I feel myself to be a collective now. There are a lot of friends that I want to raise up with me, to whatever degree that is possible.

I am sorry that I haven't yet read enough of your posts to see or know you, but I respect the wisdom and advice of the few posts of yours that I have read so far. I feel like I have some deep questions that some of you here might be able to help me with. But it's hard to even formulate my questions into words. I've been allowing that feeling of having wordless questions to percolate.

I am glad that some sense of emptiness is transmitted from my site. A few months ago, I wrote a long challenging article directly about emptiness and was not happy with how it turned out. I hope to revise it. I've been feeling like I haven't written directly enough about the unknown. I think that writing for folks here may help me to do that. 

Your comment about me never asking if I am doing something the right way makes me smile. I spent most of my life failing and doing things the wrong way, or half right and half wrong, which ends up feeling all wrong. When you spend decades of your life steeped in struggle and failure, it's easy to embrace the right path once you finally stumble into it. But also a lot of self correcting mechanism are built into my path and perhaps any true path. Deeper truth holds up and needs no justification. Lots of little corrections happen all the time. If I sleep on something, I wake up with slightly more clarity around it. I am willing to be wrong on all kinds of levels and admit that and fix that. I am willing to be vulnerable and make mistakes. I also work hard to have words, actions, feelings all line up and match. That's a big work in progress. Also, my husband is very skillful at calling me on things in humorous ways. He relentlessly helps me to keep it real. It's such a benefit to have someone in your life like that. Perhaps he will be inspired to post here, too. He is older than I am, and did Vipassana retreats way back before I met him.

Throughout my life I have had an extreme lack of self-confidence. As a child, the only low marks on my report card were for self-esteem and self-confidence. I remember wanting to know what those things were so that I could do them better! I repeatedly test things out in my own experience. I have tested out some things that I have recently picked up on this forum, and will write some future comments about those things. But most importantly, when something is deeply and genuinely right from within, you just feel it. Those are the things to stay with. I stay with those same deep things day after day, over and over. The right process for oneself is the right way. We each are different. (I know you know all this, but thank you for giving me a platform to articulate it for those here who are struggling to find their way.)

Thanks for seeing how the dream world and waking life communicate and work together. I am being led in a direction of the collapse of boundaries between them. This is terrifying. Much more terrifying than a collapse of the "I" or "me", and that is scary enough! 

Thank you for your kind and generous comment that evoked all these words. I feel badly that I do not know you enough to respond in kind. However, I feel a sense of immediate friendship with you. Thanks for breaking through all those conventional barriers so fast. I look forward to getting to know you more. I like the optimism and openness that you radiate. I was going to wish you blessings, but you feel like you already have ample blessings. (Correct me if I am wrong about that.) Much love to you. 
George S, modified 1 Month ago at 4/28/22 9:37 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/28/22 9:37 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2458 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
Arena Heidi
Thanks for seeing how the dream world and waking life communicate and work together. I am being led in a direction of the collapse of boundaries between them. This is terrifying. Much more terrifying than a collapse of the "I" or "me", and that is scary enough! 

​​​​​​​I can resonate with that. Life becomes quite strange when all experiences are recognized as being "equally real" qua experience, with no persistent self tying them together in a straight line through time.
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 4/29/22 8:31 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/29/22 8:31 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

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Thanks George. I have resonated with the posts of yours that I have read. I am winding my way into writing more specifically about this subject (when I have more time) because this is where my practice is at now. I welcome advice from others around this topic. My deepest most intense trauma from childhood revolves around an experience that does not fit into socially accepted waking life reality. (The experience was internalized as rape and led to other experiences, such as invasive medical exams, which were also internalized as rape.) I do not have full memory of the trauma, just an intuitive fragmented sense of it that I have circled around my entire life. But I wonder if most of the terror is from unresolved trauma? The terror from this experience is much stronger than the terror from fully remembered events that fit with consensual reality. I suspect that others may have trauma that surfaces when one's meditation bridges to different states of consciousness. 

There are experiences that feel more real than consensually agreed upon reality when I had them. And also as you said, experiences become equally real and also equally dreamlike. When I was in my late 20s, I had a recognition that consensual reality was actually quite flimsy, like a house of cards that could easily collapse on itself when one stopped buying into the kind of rational restrictive thinking that held it all together. I was very sick when I had that insight and felt like reality and life were collapsing and leading me toward death. But the insight stayed with me and I am working with it now.

Wishing you all the best with your practice. I look forward to discussing things with you more. 
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Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö, modified 1 Month ago at 4/29/22 12:10 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/29/22 12:10 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 6428 Join Date: 12/8/18 Recent Posts
I have so been looking forward to having the time and energy to read this thread and your links properly. Now I have, and I love it! 

I also love the notion that consensual reality is quite flimsy. I often say that normality is overrated, but your wording has an anything-is-possible ring to it that makes me smile. 

I visited your website. You look so genuinely happy and happily genuine. That's beautiful! 

I do feel like I'm following a thread, too. It has led me through many big life changes that I would never had expected beforehand, but they have all made sense and been healing. 

I see sadhus where others see some weird loser, so I know what you are talking about. There's probably lots of things that I do not see, though, and one of the practice aims closest to my heart is opening up to recognize that which is now filtered out. 
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terry, modified 1 Month ago at 4/29/22 2:44 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/29/22 2:44 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2185 Join Date: 8/7/17 Recent Posts
aloha ah,

   You said:

I think that the spiritual materialism and new age thinking of our time period has tended to promote greed and an obsessive need to acquire wealth and material possessions. I think that a return to simplicity of connection to ourselves, each other, diverse groups, and the earth and nature is beneficial. We don't have to give up technology, but instead find ways to have it enhance communication and connection instead of increasing separatism among groups.


   
Perhaps it is greed and avarice that give rise to spiritual materialism and trippy hippy claptrap rather than the reverse.

   Separatism is being forced and coerced upon us, and the species has an insanely brief period of time to turn the titanic aside. Basically, our cooperation amounts to singing nearer my god to thee as the deck slants. Probably time for kumbayah and we shall overcome. Cue the horns.

   Thich nhat hanh likens the ideal of nonviolence to navigating by the north star: the idea is to head north, not to arrive at the star. What is north for us as a species, given the climate emergency and the success of late capitalism in keeping the ship on course for the iceberg?

  The very people who demand freedom have so abused free speech and the right to bear arms that they need to be silenced and have their guns taken away. By, as you say, political action.

   A communist revolution along the chinese model. With capitalists who go overboard, kill a few of them and the rest will fall into line. State owned corporations to put amazon google and facebook out of business, and att and verizon and twitter. Confiscatory taxes for all oligarchs, and prison for climate criminals.

   Planet's climate already past tipping points, clearly billions will die from melting planetary ice alone in decades if not sooner.

   The sky is falling, eh? What do we do?
​​​​​​​

(welcome to the club....wink)

terry

   

   
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Ni Nurta, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 1:51 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 1:51 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 930 Join Date: 2/22/20 Recent Posts
terry
   A communist revolution along the chinese model. With capitalists who go overboard, kill a few of them and the rest will fall into line. State owned corporations to put amazon google and facebook out of business, and att and verizon and twitter. Confiscatory taxes for all oligarchs, and prison for climate criminals.

@DhO moderation team
Please ban this wanna be comrade for encouraging violent behavior

Planet's climate already past tipping points, clearly billions will die from melting planetary ice alone in decades if not sooner.

Planet's climate is definitely in better condition than you it seems
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 6:10 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 6:09 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Hi Terry. The main point I was tying to make is that it's helpful to inquire into political situations in ways that are similar to self inquiry. I notice that I tend to resonate with people who are doing that. Similar perspectives tend to emerge from deeper inquiry. For me listening to mainstream news is like paying attention to wounded egos desperately grasping for control. I do my best to hold a space of compassion for what I witness. Fortunately, the internet allows for a wide range of sources. There are people who articulate balanced and intelligent political and economic perspectives that are equivalent to some of the spiritual perspectives offered here.
​​​​​​​
Forgive me, but I didn't understand your post, though I could appreciate the poetic feel of it. There are a lot of posts here (not just yours) that I feel like I need a translator or someone to explain them to me. It wasn't clear to me what your perspective was and if we had any sort of alignment. I also try to feel into emotions and tone underlying the words even if I don't understand the meaning, and when I did that with your post I just felt sad. Wishing you the best with your words and intentions.
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 6:55 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 6:55 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

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Linda, thank you. I had a hard day yesterday with a string of disappointments. Your comment was like a bright light shining in a dark space. I appreciate how much you give back to me and others here. It's a joy to witness how you help new folks and how you make intimidating spaces warm and welcoming. You gave me the initial encouragement that I needed to continue posting here. (So far today feels much better. With some things falling through in my life, I have more time to post here.)

With the following of the thread, it isn't always clear why it is leading in a certain direction. But then in retrospect like you said, it all makes sense and is healing. That kind of positive unexpectedness reinforces the goodness of the path, and encourages one to keep following subtle threads, dreams, and hazy amorphous things.

Grateful for your seeing into the essential goodness of those who have been unfairly judged. I also have felt mostly blind and like I'm trying to feel my way through dark places. There's a sense like I am just beginning to see in the dark, but am still mostly blind. I hope my practice leads to bigger heart openings. 

Grateful to be on this journey with you and getting to know you more. I hope things are going well enough for you in all aspects of your life.
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Smiling Stone, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 11:25 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 11:25 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 260 Join Date: 5/10/16 Recent Posts
Hello Arena,

I will renew the welcome to the forum, I hope you find here the kind of community you're looking for... I've been browsing through your site and enjoyed putting a face on your internet personae, and getting introduced to your loved ones. I only read the John Brodie piece so far, and enjoyed the deeply respectful / loving portray you did of him... as an obituary that says something I share about our societies... As a practicioner, I use to think "small is beautiful" but respect your wider ambition to make the world a better place, I might well learn something from it !

Re this comment on another thread :
(On a technical note about the DhO forum, why do some people's other posts (like Julieta's) not show up? Were they from long ago and not recent enough? Is there a way to find them?)
Since the "big shift" (to a newer version of Liferay), when we click on "recent posts" to check somebody's posting history here, we only have access to the last year's threads where the person was active. So, if the user was not active in the last year, the "recent posts" will stay blank, too bad... I miss that option as well, but there is no solution it seems...

with metta
smiling stone
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terry, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 2:20 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 2:20 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2185 Join Date: 8/7/17 Recent Posts
there is a balance between reason and feeling

poetry and prose

action and inquiry


feelings indeed are information


people hear what they want to hear, see what they want to see...


ease their way into their comfort zones...


mi casa es su casa

e koma mai

make yourself at home

don't worry be happy


I don't avoid sadness


the world is a burning house


aloha
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terry, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 2:40 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 2:40 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2185 Join Date: 8/7/17 Recent Posts
for some people, call them venusians, communication is all about "tone"

for others, call them martians, communication is all about "truth"


for us humans

communication is love


it is love which needs to be recognized

not chopped, parsed, boxed or anal - ized


sadly, we often don't recognize each other's love...

​​​​​​​clinging to our own styles
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terry, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 2:43 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 2:43 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2185 Join Date: 8/7/17 Recent Posts
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Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö, modified 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 8:22 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 3:29 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 6428 Join Date: 12/8/18 Recent Posts
Honestly, terry, your stereotypical platitudes about men and women are getting somewhat tiresome. Please just take responsibility for your own communication instead of implying that women care more about tone than truth and going all martyr about not having your "love" recognized as soon as you don't get the usual bro high-five from someone.

I'm no fan of capitalism myself, but encouraging people to kill some capitalists isn't okay here. 

​​​​​​​Linda Ö,  DhO moderator
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finding-oneself *, modified 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 11:43 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 4/30/22 11:41 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 252 Join Date: 1/7/14 Recent Posts
Hi Heidi. Thanks for sharing on the DhO.
"We each are a vital and equal part of this grand dance of divinity. Our lives and existence depend entirely upon a vast unknown mystery and indwelling spark of God. Some of us consciously surrender to the unknown and rest in the genuine to a greater or lesser degree. But each life may be likened to a spiritual teaching of one kind or another. I hope to reclaim and promote the lives and spiritual qualities of those who have become lost due to the sophistication and intellectual reasoning of our culture. I spend time being with and humbly integrating a full range of diverse human experience that exists within and around me. It is only through being with my own weakness and flaws, that I may be able to grasp and appreciate the humanity of another, with its full capacity for both hatred and love, craziness and sanity. For wherever we fall on the spectrum of light and dark, awakened or asleep, may we retrieve and treat kindly these underappreciated aspects of each other and ourselves. May we learn to live humble lives of integrity. May we discover and live a redemption of the whole."

I just wanted to let you know this is really helping me a lot! C:
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 9:46 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 9:46 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Smiling Stone, I love your user name and feel an affinity with it and you! I looked up some of your posts and was impressed with the positive energy that you radiate to folks and your openness. Looking at some of your posts clued me into a number of things that I appreciated about this community. One thread in particular revealed Chris's skill as a moderator and people's capacity to learn from their mistakes. All good qualities that I value in a community. The degree of kindness that I've received here so far has been moving and caught me by surprise. I've lived a very private hidden life until last year.

I might have joined this community much sooner if I had known the degree to which diverse paths would be welcomed. It felt intimidating to enter, and I feel grateful that Linda smoothed the way on her log and with my first post on the thread concerning tinnitus. But even if I hadn't received this kind of welcome, I felt determined to give it a good try here. I listen to and follow the direction of subtle inner promptings. I knew that I needed to pull my energy back from Instagram and find a place with others on a dedicated spiritual path. Not having a sangha, formal teacher, or much external support required me to develop persistence in a different kind of way.

Diversity of approach is an incredibly good thing when people are open to learning from and respecting differences. Each person needs to find their own way to awakening and more possibilities makes this easier. In my work as a caregiver and teacher, I always tried to find the passion and gifts of each child or elderly person that I cared for. I did a lot of unusual things to inspire and draw out a particular individual. I've always received joy from helping another to shine. On spiritual levels things are even more delicate. The wrong approach for an individual can cause great harm. One size does not fit all and it's perplexing for me why many spiritual teachers just promote one thing for everyone. I'm totally with you in thinking small is beautiful. And I want to make the world a better place through every small encounter and each small action that I take. I witness you doing the same. 

Anyhow, this community is the right place for me for right now. The future is unknown. I pray to be of service to others and trust that I will be shown the way.

Thanks Smiling Stone for your warm welcome. Look forward to engaging more with you. Sending blessings, love and peace to you and others.
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 10:05 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 10:05 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Thanks finding-oneself for posting that quote and letting me know that it's helping you. As a writer (who works way too hard on writing!) all I want is for my words to reach and touch something in another. And also to convey some essence of truth. Thanks for taking the time to tell me this. I don't have time to look up more about you right now, but look forward to getting to know you in the future. I've learned that it's very hard to go wrong with kindness. If I could do my life over, I would have been more kind early on, especially towards myself. Wishing you all the best with everything in your life right now.
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Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö, modified 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 10:41 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 10:41 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 6428 Join Date: 12/8/18 Recent Posts
I'm so glad to see that you have decided to stay! Yay! DhO is at its finest when we manage to do the kind of bridging that you are looking for, in my opinion. Sometimes we seem to forget about it, so positive reminders are always welcome. 

I totally agree with your assessment of Smiling Stone, by the way. 
George S, modified 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 9:55 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/1/22 8:35 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2458 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
Yeah trauma recall is notoriously tricky. Even with the events I remember well, the memories are constantly being modified as I revisit them in different contexts with different levels of understanding. Then there are the things I may never remember, as well as the intergenerational trauma which gets unconsciously passed on, not to mention the cultural and social trauma which surrounds us. And they all feed into each other!

I also have this sense of unknown (and possibly unknowable) traumas beyond those that I know about. When the pain is strong, the question arises – maybe something even worse happened that I don’t remember? Or maybe I’m discounting the impact of the experiences that I do remember? Or maybe a bit of both?

I’ve had some instances where I was experiencing an unremembered, unrecognized or unknown trauma, which later came to light. For most of my life I’ve experienced intense surface headaches and I never felt much of an emotional bond with my mother. When I was around 30 she told me that my birth was very traumatic and I had to be delivered using forceps, and was then separated from her for several days.

When I was 8 I was sent away from home to live at a boarding school. For most of my life I bought the story that this was a GOOD THING, since it was a prestigious school and it’s a common practice among certain classes in England. A few years ago I came across the work of a therapist called Nick Duffel, who observed that many ex-boarders suffer mental health problems in later life, since the child feels deeply abandoned by their parents in a loveless institution (rife with bullying and sexual abuse). I’m inclined to think there’s an karmic angle to this particular kind of trauma, since these boarding schools were designed as the training grounds for empire and parents are purchasing social and educational advantages for their children not just with money but also their child’s emotional wellbeing and psychological health.

I had a great granduncle who perpetrated a significant amount of sexual trauma within his family and community about 100 years ago. It also happens that he was a well known artist and kept a diary, which came to light when a new biography of him was published about 30 years ago. I recently re-read it and was amazed by how accurately some of those traumas appear to have been recreated in subsequent generations, albeit with lesser severity. Outright sexual abuse morphed into emotional abuse, but still fitting the same template and affecting me deeply (alcoholism, depression and suicide/attempts are common coping mechanisms in my family). Had he not been well known then I might never have known about the origin of this particular form of suffering. When I read the book as a teenager the traumatic aspect completely passed me by, and most of my family still seem to be proud of their association with him.

You probably know this already if you’ve done trauma work – however much of the story someone may know about their trauma, the body (subconscious mind) keeps an accurate record of all the trauma they have suffered. The body also knows how to release the trauma when the time is right. And it also seems to have a way of releasing the memories we need to know, as well as suggesting other images and narratives (often from the collective unconscious memory), which provide a mental framing for the physical experience in the body. I think the bottom line in this kind of work is that if it’s felt in the body and the story matches the felt experience, then it’s “true for you”, which is to say it’s true period.

It seems that most trauma will slowly be released in deep meditation, but I’ve also found having an experienced guide helpful in accessing unconscious material to help the process along. I’ve also read that psychedelics with the right setting and intention can be very effective, though I haven’t tried those recently except for cannabis (these days there are such strong THC concentrations that it can generate some pretty intense and deep trips!) 
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/3/22 6:35 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/3/22 6:34 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Thanks George for your detailed response about trauma. I could totally relate to and felt a resonance with everything that you wrote. You articulated things well. I agree with the trickiness and I have been amazed by my body's intelligent process with unraveling things.

I also had birth trauma and ancestral trauma come to light. For example, I was named after someone who died suddenly at a relatively young age. For most of the earlier part of my life I had this feeling that I was going to die young. It was a relief when I realized that this idea of early death had been unconsciously passed down to me along with the name. It fell away once I made the connection, but other ancestral issues have been more challenging.

I also see how positive things are passed down. For example, an uncle of mine works with studying and promoting shared leadership in the workspace, which feels very related to the nonhierarchical approach I promote with spiritual teaching. Last year I helped my dad to write a sermon. Although my religious and political views are completely different from his, helping him with his sermon showed me the commonalities in our composition process and morality. I could see how my thinking evolved from his.

​​​​​​​I would be curious to hear who your Great Grand Uncle is, if you felt comfortable sharing that, but I understand if you don’t. What kind of guides have you had that were helpful in accessing unconscious material? I spent a lot of years in therapy with mixed results. These days I have become too sensitive to mind altering drugs to use them. I can “trip” on CBD. But I think the therapeutic use of psychedelics has a lot of potential.
George S, modified 1 Month ago at 5/4/22 3:01 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/4/22 3:01 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2458 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
 That's great that you've worked through some ancestral issues. It's fascinating how things get passed down.

My great granduncle was called Eric Gill. He sexually abused his sisters and daughters, all the while preaching the virtues of “integrated catholic family life”. He was a kind of dodgy guru in a way.

I've worked with a healer/guide called Francesa Oldani. She helped me to go straight to the root of certain issues and release/transform them much more effectively than in conventional talking therapy.

I am definitely more sensitive to mind altering drugs since becoming a meditator. It doesn't take much to get me trippin!
 
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/6/22 5:59 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/6/22 5:59 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Thanks George for telling me your Great Granduncle's name. It's so fascinating to look at his artwork and to see how my perspective of his work changes when I look at it through the lens of sexual abuse. I like his work a lot, but then when I bring in the thought of sexual abuse his sexualized work creeps me out.

From the Wikipedia page: "Since these revelations became public in 1989, there have been a number of calls for works by Gill to be removed from public buildings and art collections." What do you think about this? Do you think his work should be removed? 

Thanks for mentioning the healer that you saw. She seems like someone that I would relate to. I like her baskets. I have fleeting memories of Native American lives that I seem to draw upon in this life. 

I've been resonating with the advice that you have been giving to people here. Your approach to things feels similar to my own. A good friend of mine who visited DhO said that there were a few things that you touched on that he found illuminating of his own personal experiences.

​​​​​​​Do you have a log here or place where you have written about your journey/experiences? 
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Smiling Stone, modified 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 5:11 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 5:11 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 260 Join Date: 5/10/16 Recent Posts
Hey Arena,
I wanted to thank you and Linda for your kind words, that made me blush really, and I hope I will meet your expectations in the future.

I wanted to wait to answer until I read more of your blogposts, but I'm lagging behind (mainly thanks to Dreamwalker's trick site:www.dharmaoverground.org name of subject to find old threads, I got lost in the past again...) and was on Dho this morning, so here I am...

I can see that you quickly find a central place here, so keep on the good work. I'm sure we'll bump into each other again around here (I plan to be more active, we'll see...)

love and metta to all
smiling stone
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 11:30 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 11:30 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
I wanted to thank you and Linda for your kind words, that made me blush really, and I hope I will meet your expectations in the future.

I think it would be quite difficult (impossible?) for you to change who you are that drastically that Linda and I would not appreciate you. I would even guess that others here and in your life feel the same way, too. It’s too bad that collective appreciation of someone tends to happen most reliably at their funeral.

For anyone reading this: Imagining what folks might say at your funeral (or what you would like them to say) might be a useful practice to reveal success in life and good directions to move in. At formal funerals people tend not to bring up the difficult parts. But funerals where lots of people openly and honestly share, tend to reveal the weakness and flaws of an individual in loving and often humorous light. Those kinds of funerals are incredibly moving.
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 4:37 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 4:37 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
I have been grateful for all the positive response to my introduction. It was much more than I expected. I am returning now to the theme of this thread. My plan is to write first about dreams and how they guide my life. Sometime later, I will describe my primary meditation and how it emerged from dreams. Then after that, I will illustrate how particular dreams have helped me to deepen my meditation practice.

My waking life and dream life are very tightly integrated and have been for a long time. I could also say that my conscious and subconscious are tightly integrated as well. (I have dreams that describe this relationship that I may share and discuss in a later post.) Waking and dream life integration brings forth feelings of wholeness and unity.

I hope that by revealing my path, it will shine a light upon and aid someone else’s journey. We learn from and inspire each other. I appreciate differences and the uniqueness of each person. That’s why I’m posting on a forum where most people are following a very different path than I am. Everyone on DhO has something to teach me. I’ve been learning a lot by reading your posts. I think that it is useful to drop hierarchy in terms of egoic feelings of being more evolved than someone else or other life forms, such as plants and animals. However, hierarchy in terms of developmental stages may be pragmatically useful. For example, a child is obviously at a different developmental stage than an elderly person, but both child and elder may offer wisdom and benefit from different kinds of structure and guidance.

In 2002, I began to have an ongoing series of related dreams. These dreams have actively guided my life and spiritual awakening. There were probably earlier dreams that were quite relevant, but I’ve lost most of those records. Also, in 2002, I experimented a handful of times with Salvia divinorum. It opened a pathway into an underlying 3D reality that felt more vivid, alive and real than this reality. After those experiences, I began to occasionally fall back into that colorful geometric reality right before falling asleep. Over the years, it became more regular and normal to experience this alive 3D kaleidoscopic reality. I don’t know if my experimentation with Salvia was instrumental in helping to usher in this dream series. The plant spirit of Salvia came to me as an alive intelligent entity that felt feminine and profound. D. M. Turner described the Salvia entity or Goddess in his last two paragraphs here: https://www.erowid.org/library//books_online/salvinorin/j4.shtml  His description fit my experience.

This dream from December 18, 2001 is the one that I always think of as the beginning of the series. It marks a shift in waking life of taking full responsibility for all parts of myself and life.

I am floating in and down a river while holding onto a piece of very thin board that has about eight animals lying on it. I am taking care of them. One of the animals keeps falling halfway off the board and I tenderly lift it back on. The animals are limp, passive, and amorphous as to the type. They are long, stretched out, and brown colored. I have no idea if they are limp because they are newborn, near death, sick, or sleeping. I don't think about why they are passive. I just accept and care for them as they are. They are vulnerable. I protect and take care of them. I am responsible for them. I am also somewhat repulsed and fearful of handling them (much as I would be afraid to handle rats in waking life). The river we are in is swollen and the current is carrying us much more forcefully than I realize. There have recently been very heavy rains and the river is still flooded and raging from the storms. We come to a curve in the river where there is a small rounded beach embankment on the right. We gently beach there. I tell the animals that it is best if we stop here, because I don't know what is up ahead and the river current is stronger and more unpredictable than I thought. There are some animals chained up here (like fierce bulldogs). I worry about them getting loose and harming my animals.

Rereading this dream now, I realize that it encapsulates much of my spiritual approach to healing and life. Over many years and many dreams, the animals evolve and become quite advanced in what they are capable of. I hope to publish the entire series someday.

It generally takes one of these dreams about 6 to 9 months play out in waking life. Some of the more advanced dreams have taken longer. Often, it’s a surprise when the dreams manifest in waking life. Even though I know what’s coming, the dreams show up differently from what I think or expect. There are many profound “aha” kinds of moments, once a dream begins to manifest in waking life. I hope that by hearing my experiences, it will further your own dream and waking life communication.
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 5:03 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 5:03 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
In addition to the ongoing series of dreams that I described above, I have also have had several “big” dreams that take a dozen or more years to play out. The first one in 2008, laid out the entire path that my awakening would take. I called it Wandering in the Spiritual Bardo and have published it on my website. When I had the dream, I was suffering a lot, so I did not expect it to manifest in my life. It felt too big and too out of my reach. But the idea that my life might somehow leave a light on for others gave me hope. The dream portended that I would make a decision to go a new way and that everything on my path would be easy and effortless once I made that decision. The new way turned out to be about listening to inner guidance and dreams, instead of following traditional teachers or teachings.

In 2020, I had a very realistic dream about an Exhibit of Dreams. That dream told me to look for a bookend dream to my first one. It also told me that reading the most powerful dreams that others have had would be very healing. If anyone is inspired to share their two most powerful dreams with me, I would be grateful. It would reinforce the dream’s manifestation into waking life. (If enough people are interested in doing this, I would start a thread here for it.) After I had this dream that referred to "bookend" dreams, I anticipated dreaming a sequel. It took me quite a few months to realize that I had actually already dreamed the sequel to the Wandering in the Bardo dream.

In March of 2020, days before Covid-19 shut everything down in my area, I dreamed of Rising Black Water subsuming everything. Though the dream itself was frightening, I woke up in the most profound state of peace that I had ever experienced. The dream has compelled me to move in the direction of emptiness and things being pulled out from under me. When I had the dream, I was puzzled as to why I was so fearful of the dark water when I knew how to swim. But now I understand that the dream is not about swimming and maintaining control, but instead it's about allowing emptiness/the unknown to guide everything in my life.

In January of this year, I have had a significant shift in manifesting the Rising Black Water dream, which I described a bit in my first post here

Linda also described a meditation in her log that felt like an a accurate representation of my meditation.

Anyhow, the shift that occurred where I now have very easy access to a deep visceral emptiness has normalized. It doesn’t feel special anymore, which is good. A different kind of 3D visuals seems to be emerging in it, but it’s really too soon to write anything about that. I look forward to it deepening and taking over more of my life! Thank you for sharing in a bit of my journey.
George S, modified 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 8:18 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/7/22 8:18 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2458 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
I would be in favor of his work being removed, at least from Westminster Cathedral (primary Catholic Church in England) and Broadcasting House (BBC headquarters). I think it would send a powerful message. Both institutions have a history of harboring sex abusers. Their commissions enabled Gill to live the life he did and provided him with a cover of moral and social authority. Thanks for asking - I didn’t think I had an opinion, but it turns out I do!

Here is the link to my log:

https://www.dharmaoverground.org/-/message_boards/message/15763667
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/8/22 2:53 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/8/22 2:53 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
Hi George. Your link didn't work. 

Thinking about your great granduncle makes me wonder how many other artists also had an unknown incestuous history. And how it would change our current appreciation of many art forms if those histories came to light. 
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Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö, modified 1 Month ago at 5/9/22 3:42 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/9/22 3:42 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 6428 Join Date: 12/8/18 Recent Posts
This is very interesting. I'll share some experiences of my own when I have the ability to verbalize it.

In the meantime, I sent you a message. 
George S, modified 1 Month ago at 5/9/22 12:20 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/9/22 12:20 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 2458 Join Date: 2/26/19 Recent Posts
Oh woops, here is the correct link:

https://www.dharmaoverground.org/discussion/-/message_boards/message/15763667

Yeah I wonder about that sometimes as well, especially with artists that have "colorful" or "unconventional" personal lives and feed off pushing boundaries and challenging the status quo. I'm not saying that all boundaries are good and the status quo doesn't need challenging at times, but obviously the intention is important and there can be shadow stuff going on even with seemingly positive intentions.
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Linda ”Polly Ester” Ö, modified 1 Month ago at 5/24/22 2:53 AM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/24/22 2:53 AM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 6428 Join Date: 12/8/18 Recent Posts
I feel somewhat overwhelmed by the thought of trying to give justice to how dreams, dream visions and other visions have had importance for me in my journey. So - I won't try to do justice to it, just make some scattered notes. 

As a teenager I had a dream experience with a voice talking to me, saying in Swedish "Det är få förunnat att kunna genomskåda sig själva" (in English something like "It's a grace bestowed on the few to be able to see through themselves") while showing me the image of a ladder leading up to the sky. I took that as a calling, although I didn't know what to do with it. I tried some meditation and had a clear vision of Shiva, which was astonishing since I wasn't a visual person at all. Then some other meditation experiences around that time scared the crap out of me, and so I avoided it entirely for a couple of decades, until Kundalini awakening happened on its own with an incredible force, and then it took another few years before I learned what Kundalini was and started to listen instead of fighting it. 

Throughout my life I have had periods of dreaming stuff that would come true. Mainly small details, but specific and weird enough for it to be more than mere coincidence, and sometimes a whole series of dreams until it came true. There have also been some dreams like that involving bigger stuff, like a collegue of mine going of the grid in a weird way and me being the one who would eventually find her, and another collegue being pregnant and then misscarrying. That was a bit scary. 

In one dream (something inbetween a lucid dream and an OBE?) I got to say farewell to my dad after he had committed suicide. It turned out that my brother had had a very similar experience before me. 

As regular dreams go, a powerful one was somewhat later, still in my teenage years, when I had just started doing some amateur theatre which would turn out to be central to finding myself. In the dream I was in the cellar of the house that was me (typically symbolizing one's subconscious), and it had been frozen and isolated by thick prison walls of ice, but now they had started to melt. On a spring flood there was a canoe approaching me, and in it were my new theatre friends who were coming to get me out of my isolation. 

In my adult life there was a period of reoccuring dreams about boundaries, with missing walls and gaps between walls and floor and stuff like that, until in one dream a hyena came to me, playing in harmony with a lap dog. I knew that the hyeana was there to protect my boundaries. I started to invoke it when I needed. It made my life better and the dreams about missing walls stopped.

I have sometimes had visions (sometimes involving kinesthetics more vividly than the visuals) in my meditations. One was very early in my practice, as I was trying to push through to equanimity. In the vision I was standing on the ground looking up to a glider plane that was effortlessly hovering in the air above me. Then I tried to climb into it, which took a lot of effort and struggle leading me nowhere. Seeing and feeling it like that, so clearly laid it, made the irony clear to me, and so I stopped the struggle and instead embodied the gliding of the plane in my practice. 

In another meditation "vision" (which wasn't very visual at all), I was "God" being newborn at each moment, completely inncocent, completely unconditioned, with no knowledge of anything before each moment. There was just the grat joy of manifesting. 

I have many instances of finding myself meditating while dreaming. Sometimes I have also woken up from sleep being in the midst of jhana (I heard a Theravadan monk claiming that is impossible, when somebody else had shared si similar experience, but I'd say that's too bad for him). There have also been cases of waking up in the experience of being the empty space embracing the aliveness of awareness. 
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Arena Heidi, modified 1 Month ago at 5/26/22 4:07 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/26/22 4:07 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 58 Join Date: 4/16/22 Recent Posts
 Thanks for sharing some about the lifelong influence of your dreams and visions Linda. I relate to so much of what you wrote. Reading powerful dreams and visions of another feels intimate and meaningful. Like I have a sense of some of the deeper under currents of your life. 

For all of you following this thread, I told Linda on her thread that my husband and I have been looking to buy our first house for a number of years now. It seems as if we might have just found our home in a location with spectacular views. I love the land in this area perhaps more than any place I've ever been. However, the home itself comes with lots of quirky and unusual issues, which is why no one else wanted it. I haven't moved in 35 years and the area is far enough away that it will be a total relocation. The place is much more remote than where we live now and borders a mountain of wilderness. It should be wonderful for quiet and meditation. We are just at the beginning of the home buying process and so nothing is sure and definite yet. Unfortunately I will not have time to continue this thread and keep up with folks here. But I intend to return once life is more settled and my time frees up again.

I'm grateful for the connections that I've made during my brief time here. Blessings and love to all of you. May you each fully embody and manifest your deepest visions and dreams.



 
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Chris M, modified 1 Month ago at 5/26/22 4:20 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/26/22 4:20 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 4417 Join Date: 1/26/13 Recent Posts
Best of luck!
Martin, modified 1 Month ago at 5/26/22 5:36 PM
Created 1 Month ago at 5/26/22 5:36 PM

RE: The Process is the Attainment. The Process is Kind

Posts: 443 Join Date: 4/25/20 Recent Posts
I hope you have a great moving adventure (moving is always an adventure). Thanks for taking the time to chat here!

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