How to make more progress towards awakening? (longish post)

Tai An Zhou Zhou, modified 1 Year ago at 7/4/23 4:32 PM
Created 1 Year ago at 7/4/23 4:32 PM

How to make more progress towards awakening? (longish post)

Posts: 36 Join Date: 6/24/23 Recent Posts
Blessings to all as usual. I am still practicing, mainly with self-enquiry with meditation as a foundation. I figure I've written enough about my background and practice at this point emoticon

I've tried out some suggestions like noticing senses (sound, touch) and Mahasi noting with interesting results but I tend to stick with what seems to be working best. 

I've been having more experiences during my practice, some of which seem to correspond to the Maps of Insight, and some of which do not. (same goes for xabir's models) From what I can see, there are some commonalities to the path of progress (if not, why have a map?) but in my experience it has not been a linear progression. Some things that I experience are :

(I actually have spoken to xabir on multiple occasions, he thinks that these are just glimpses but not the "I AM")

Among things I experience are : 

a) Bright lights, colors, vivid sensations
b) A sense of reality "thinning" and alternatively getting closer
c) Everything becoming more real and luminous 
d) A kind and gentle voice speaking to me, usually at milestones in my practice, where it ushers me through mental gates
e) Moments of intense clarity in the now, accompanied by awareness of energy in my body, and usually joy (like "wow, just existing is so fun!")
f) Able to more and more realize when the mind is just chattering and pull myself back 
g) This sense that I am present everywhere, as in the same "me" that is writing this is also the lamppost, the air etc. It's hard to put into words, the sense feels "in-between" and conceptual. 
h) Everything is occurring, and I am simply the holding space, or the observer of it all. 

Some of these seem to correspond to the A&P...I'm not sure if I have had several A&Ps in my life, since I can recall therapy sessions in which I also experienced similar things. 

My sense of "I" is now bigger than myself, and I sort of regret that language is limited in this regard. In my current understanding, small "I" is ego/mind (normal language I) and Higher Self/God is the real "I" There's not really an "I" to begin with, because if I ask myself "who is writing" the answer comes back as "the ego/mind part of bigger consciousness"

On a conceptual level, I believe in anatta and nirvana (i.e, everything is inherently empty, time, distance etc do not exist, there is not even an I) 
but I can't make the jump there yet as I don't experience it experientially. That's the whole point of me doing this, to get there emoticon I'm concerned that I don't jump too far - should I get used to "I" being consciousness first? Like before I could get to the level where I am writing this, I had to believe it was possible. So there are "stages" in a way. 

(This is where I can see the benefit of models, so that one doesn't completely get lost and can direct practice)

In general always open about how to progress and grateful for all insights and assistance. 
Tao Te Kat, modified 1 Year ago at 7/5/23 2:30 AM
Created 1 Year ago at 7/5/23 2:30 AM

RE: How to make more progress towards awakening? (longish post)

Posts: 8 Join Date: 5/24/22 Recent Posts
 Your path is not my path, so take it as you wish:

a) Bright lights, colors, vivid sensations
b) A sense of reality "thinning" and alternatively getting closer
c) Everything becoming more real and luminous 

That three go together and are a consequence of the focus on qualia instead of though. It's right.

d) A kind and gentle voice speaking to me, usually at milestones in my practice, where it ushers me through mental gates

Some people hear voices near A&P, but not my case.

e) Moments of intense clarity in the now, accompanied by awareness of energy in my body, and usually joy (like "wow, just existing is so fun!")

Pointing to IAM

f) Able to more and more realize when the mind is just chattering and pull myself back 

Good. That's the right practice now I think... Even better than meditating.

g) This sense that I am present everywhere, as in the same "me" that is writing this is also the lamppost, the air etc. It's hard to put into words, the sense feels "in-between" and conceptual. 

All qualia is mind, that's the feeling.

h) Everything is occurring, and I am simply the holding space, or the observer of it all. 

Road towards IAM. When you retire the observer of it all, you will go towards Anatta. But the usual progession is first IAM

It looks like you're going towards IAM quite right. I wont talk about A&P because is not my path and I havent estudied it.

The focus for IAM is E, F and H. Live on them. 

E -> Just be, it's the main practice when possible. IAM
F -> Be an observer of the chatter, a "space-being" will be created or recognized beyond the chatter
H -> Two different things -> 1st Causality as Anatta, 2on Space as the watcher, but both are ok.

When E is strong enought there will be a Kensho... You will have no doubt about what it is.

The relation between IAM and the non-doer watcher is suble, by now we can say they are equivalent. The main diffference is a certain risk of pasivity if we focus too much on the "only watching-not doing" thing.

Causality doesnt implies passivity, implies absence of autonomous subject, but it can be quite active. You should find the sweet point.

​​​​​​​http://blogdetao.org
 

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